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natheitz's favorite FMLs
by extremereviews / 08/16/2015 at 6:14pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by IceWrath / 08/16/2015 at 4:14am / United Kingdom (York) / Miscellaneous
by fire starter / 08/16/2015 at 12:10am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had to fire an employee due to his staggering incompetence. The moment I said the F-word, he started fake-coughing, then loudly humming, then went to his desk and pretended not to hear anything I was saying. It took 3 of us to drag him out of the building kicking and screaming. FML
by bruised / 08/15/2015 at 11:47am / United States (Florida) / Work
by Anonymous / 08/15/2015 at 5:32am / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/14/2015 at 11:08am / Denmark / Miscellaneous
by johobus28 / 08/05/2015 at 11:31pm / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
Today, I entered a painting I'd worked on for weeks into an art competition. I won nothing. I wouldn't care so much if the guy I lost out to hadn't submitted a blank canvas and called it a "conceptual piece". FML
by thekyledavid / 08/05/2015 at 12:47pm / United Kingdom (Oxfordshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, my roommates decided to do some experimental baking. To be supportive, I tried one of their creations. I've been alternating between vomiting and diarrhea for the past hour. My jaw is sore from vomiting, and I can barely muster the energy to flush between "switching sides" anymore. FML
by sendhelp / 08/03/2015 at 1:31am / United States (Utah) / Health
by LexiD19 / 07/31/2015 at 6:56pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work
Today, while shopping with my sister, she asked me to wait for her while she quickly said hello to a friend. I sat on a bench for an hour before I realised she wasn't coming back. Turns out "hello" had turned into a date. FML
by Anonymous / 07/30/2015 at 2:56am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous
by dirtbikeguy / 07/23/2015 at 9:05am / United States (Illinois) / Animals
Today, I went out to inspect the backyard. There are now more than two dozen spiders hanging out and webs crossing from one side of the yard to the other. I have decided to surrender this territory. FML
by Skoff / 07/23/2015 at 5:44am / Australia (New South Wales) / Animals
by padthaimeanoose / 07/18/2015 at 11:29pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy
Today, my boyfriend's idiotic friend shoved me into a stream so I could be "reunited" with my family, since my name is River. The first thing I saw as I climbed out, soaking wet, was my boyfriend high-fiving his friend. FML
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…