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natheitz

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natheitznatheitz
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12997
  • Number of comments : 67
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About natheitz : Hi

natheitz's page activity

Visits<b>vaas90</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 3:43am<b>H4H</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 4:47pm<b>PhantomKitty</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 10:39am<b>Mons</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:31pm<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 1:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:23pm<b>samrompain</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 9:19pm<b>joco4</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 1:32pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:59pm<b>naw</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 5:00pm<b>cdirick</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 4:42pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 1:48pm<b>durukanus</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 4:45am<b>jjumprope</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 1:46am<b>Kane322</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 11:43pm<b>Stigorama</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 12:14am<b>uflorida21</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 1:47am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:30pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 3:23am<b>FuKcMee</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 7:03pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:41pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:53pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:20pm

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natheitz's favorite FMLs

Today, I was so sleep deprived that while making instant oatmeal, I poured the oats into the garbage and put the empty packet in a bowl, then microwaved it for 2 minutes. FML

by Agamar / 02/23/2016 at 12:00am / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I'm locked in a bedroom with two dogs to keep them from barking at the guy fixing our water heater. One of them is stress-farting. FML

by noooooo / 02/21/2016 at 11:03am / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, while taking a bus full of loud, rambunctious elementary children to school, the bus slowly slid off the road into a ditch. After waiting 30 minutes that felt like hours, I saw the tow truck arriving from the opposite direction also slide slowly off the roadway into the opposite ditch. FML

by womanoski / 02/20/2016 at 12:56pm / United States (Indiana) / Transportation

Today, my wife got fired for leaving work early once again. She's been doing random "spot checks" for the past month, convinced that she'll catch me cheating on her. This paranoid crap is exactly why I'm filing for divorce. FML

by Anonymous / 02/20/2016 at 7:53am / United Kingdom (Merton) / Love

Today, I woke up at 3:45 AM to fly to Pittsburgh to sample classes at a university there. After all that flying and sitting in traffic for 2 hours, I finally got to attend to my first class. I fell asleep during it. FML

by elow72 / 02/19/2016 at 4:47pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Transportation

Today, I finally treated myself and bought my first moisturizer. The woman at Sephora promised it would "retexturize my face." If by "retexturize" she meant, "make it feel like a rubber balloon," then she was right on the money. FML

by balloonface / 02/18/2016 at 2:48am / United States (California) / Health

Today, after interviewing for a promotion to a position that was created with me in mind, I eagerly accepted a call from my boss, expecting good news. Turns out, they found a better applicant, who they don't believe will need support from the position I currently hold, so it's being eliminated. FML

by anon_smh / 02/17/2016 at 11:37pm / United States (Montana) / Work

Today, despite hints, suggestions, and even blatant criticism, my coworker refuses to believe he smells like rotten donkey nuts. He says he only needs to shower once a week, and that he doesn't believe in deodorant. I volunteered to do an extra autopsy today because the morgue smells better. FML

by ragnarok1540 / 02/17/2016 at 11:35pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I worked such a long shift at Panera that when my boyfriend called later, I answered, "It's a fresh day at Panera Bread in [town], this is [name] speaking. How may I help you?" He thought it was hilarious. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2016 at 7:53pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, my now ex-boyfriend told me that I was the one. Not at this moment though, he wants to see how far he can go with his best female friend. But once he's done with her, we can be together. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2016 at 7:32am / Netherlands / Love

Today, after a week of waiting to hear something about my stolen car, I got a letter in the mail saying it had been impounded the same day I reported it stolen, but they don't share a database with the police so they never called. Now the impound wants $900 plus $120 for the tow to release it. FML

by Jeezus / 02/15/2016 at 10:00pm / Canada (Alberta) / Money

Today, I was miserable with a cold. So I ordered soup and noodles from a new Chinese restaurant. Now I am miserable with a cold and food poisoning. FML

by All the ills / 02/15/2016 at 3:32pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, I think I've conditioned my body to not function without technology, as I simply couldn't take a shit until I got up, fetched my phone and returned to the toilet to read stuff on here. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2016 at 4:15am / Netherlands (Noord-Brabant) / Health

Today, I greeted my boss with, "Looking good, did you lose weight?" He responded that no, he'd just purchased larger pants. FML

by candy / 02/11/2016 at 7:24am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I found out that people are notified when you list them on Twitter. I've been listing people as "Interesting" and "Stupid". FML

by Shiet / 02/09/2016 at 11:08pm / Singapore / Miscellaneous