Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 7802
  • Number of comments : 60
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About natheitz : Hi

natheitz's page activity

Visits<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:59pm<b>naw</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 5:00pm<b>cdirick</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 4:42pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 1:48pm<b>durukanus</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 4:45am<b>jjumprope</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 1:46am<b>Kane322</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 11:43pm<b>Stigorama</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 12:14am<b>uflorida21</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 1:47am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:30pm<b>TimeBandit17</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 5:29pm<b>armyant98</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 1:19pm<b>FuKcMee</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 1:03pm<b>VitoCruz</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 11:52am<b>taaywall</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 11:03am<b>ZY1431</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 11:43am<b>Matheo</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 10:41am<b>Kvothee</b> - the 08/17/2015 at 5:12am

Fucked!<b>FuKcMee</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 7:03pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:41pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:53pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:20pm

natheitz's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of natheitz's badges

natheitz's favorite FMLs

Today, I felt some serious gas building up while at the supermarket. I tried to quietly fart it out, only to end up sharting myself. I had to frantically waddle out of the store as discreetly as possible as several people in the vicinity freaked out and tried to locate the source of the smell. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24469) - you deserved it (3999)

On 07/17/2015 at 1:14pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML


I agree, your life sucks (28708) - you deserved it (2622)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by Julianapilikusplatosophophes (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my psycho ex girlfriend got up in my face after I dumped her. She said I'm going to pay and that one day, when I think I'm safe and happy, my joy will turn to ash in my mouth. When I pointed out she'd just ripped off a Game of Thrones quote, she kneed me in the balls. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26461) - you deserved it (3740)

On 07/10/2015 at 10:42pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to explain to several young children why asking the new blind girl to play hide and seek with them is inappropriate. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26871) - you deserved it (2501)

On 07/10/2015 at 12:52pm - kids - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Nottingham)

Today, instead of canceling for the third consecutive time due to work-related reasons, my boyfriend sent his twin brother on our date. They both thought I wouldn't notice. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27571) - you deserved it (1909)

On 07/08/2015 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my house was robbed while I was at work. The robber left a note telling me my stuff was crappy and that they found my safe under the bed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25658) - you deserved it (1991)

On 06/26/2015 at 12:29pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my dad got so drunk that I had to drive him home. He kept yelling at me to not speed, saying I was going too fast and that there were too many bumps on the road. I hadn't even started the car yet. FML

Today, I was complimented on my improved performance over the last 3 months. My boss said he doesn't know what I've done to improve, but to keep it up. I'd only started looking for another job, and stopped giving a shit. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25414) - you deserved it (2166)

On 06/25/2015 at 3:06am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, while driving to Nashville, I saw a bunch of wild turkeys huddled together on the side of the road. I was excited to point them out to my boyfriend, until I realized that the "wild turkeys" were in fact vultures, and that they were eating a dead deer. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20590) - you deserved it (3915)

On 06/24/2015 at 3:45pm - animals - by That escalated quickly - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my creepy 12-year-old neighbour stood on his trampoline, looked over my fence and started waving a large net around, chanting my dog's name. Now I'm scared to let my dog outside alone. FML

Today, I attended my best friend's wedding. Instead of throwing her bouquet, she turned around and handed it to me. I was the only single lady out of 150 guests. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29069) - you deserved it (2445)

On 06/22/2015 at 11:13pm - love - by hairstylistprobs - United States

Today, at my work in a call centre, a man called up on a very quiet line to report a car accident on his father's behalf because his father was deaf. I asked him to ask his dad if he was OK after the accident. I'd misheard him and he had said "dead", not "deaf". He started crying. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30324) - you deserved it (3882)

On 06/22/2015 at 7:35am - work - by Iamsosorry (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, while talking to my parents, I dropped an ordinary drinking glass. After I apologized and cleaned the mess, they told me that they had decided that if I couldn't be careful at home, I certainly couldn't be careful on the roads. They took away my keys. I'm 19. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27756) - you deserved it (2596)

On 06/15/2015 at 7:07pm - misc - by PatientlyDying (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I started working my new summer job at McDonald's. Only 2 hours into my first shift, my tooth falls out onto a young girl's tray of food. Not only did she see it, but my managers and other people waiting in line all saw it. I don't think I have a summer job anymore. FML

Mselle Risa's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML Pics : The top 4 pics
  • They say that a picture is worth a boring bunch of words thrown at you by a corporate robot. That's true. Corporate robots are the worst. Anyway, the FML Pics app is still being downloaded all over the…

Tuesday 24 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: