natheitz

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Offline (the 12/04/2016 at 2:21am)

natheitz

5Fucked!

natheitznatheitz
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 12994
  • Number of comments : 67
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About natheitz : Hi

natheitz's page activity

Visits<b>vaas90</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 3:43am<b>H4H</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 4:47pm<b>PhantomKitty</b> - the 05/30/2016 at 10:39am<b>Mons</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:31pm<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 1:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:23pm<b>samrompain</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 9:19pm<b>joco4</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 1:32pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:59pm<b>naw</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 5:00pm<b>cdirick</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 4:42pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 1:48pm<b>durukanus</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 4:45am<b>jjumprope</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 1:46am<b>Kane322</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 11:43pm<b>Stigorama</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 12:14am<b>uflorida21</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 1:47am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:30pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 3:23am<b>FuKcMee</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 7:03pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:41pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:53pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:20pm

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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

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natheitz's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend and I were brushing our teeth, standing side by side. We both have a sympathy gag reflex. He brushed his tongue and gagged, which caused me to gag. So we had a never ending gag-fest until we both began throwing up and couldn't stop until one of us could manage to hold it in. FML

by StateOfEuphoria / 07/24/2016 at 6:52pm / United States (Mississippi) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I walked out the back door of my place of employment and looked down to see a huge cockroach. This is quite a normal occurrence, so I thought nothing of it until I realized it was struggling to drag the corpse of one of its friends into the building. FML

by unemployed / 07/11/2016 at 3:09pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, I learned that my friends nicknamed me Snow White, not because I’ve got dark hair and very pale skin, but because I “only hook up with tiny dudes”. FML

by Jioune / 07/05/2016 at 5:56pm / France (Rhone-Alpes) / Love

Today, I was kissing my crush for the first time and her tooth fell out into my mouth. FML

by drpepperking10 / 07/02/2016 at 7:27pm / United States / Love

Today, while updating my résumé, I noticed that in my list of achievements it said "Torturing middle school students". I meant "tutoring", but I guess this explains why I'm still unemployed a year after I started looking for a job. FML

by fuckel4 / 07/01/2016 at 4:12pm / United States (Arkansas) / Work

Today, the paternity test came back. It's like I suspected all along; my "son" is actually my half-brother. FML

by Anonymous / 07/01/2016 at 12:23pm / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Kids

Today, I sent my boyfriend a selfie where I used the Snapchat face-swap to put my best friend's face on mine. My boyfriend didn't notice and texted back, 'Wow, so beautiful!' FML

by Catnip / 06/30/2016 at 7:42pm / Germany (Hessen) / Love

Today, my friends renamed my dog, “Dog Vader.“ Yes, my dog has asthma. FML

by Lua / 06/28/2016 at 1:09pm / France (Picardie) / Animals

Today, my work directory was updated to reflect my recent promotion. Due to lack of space, they abbreviated the title. I'm now listed as "Sr Anal". FML

by Muchacha22 / 06/20/2016 at 1:25pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, my boyfriend took me to get the abortion that we both agreed on. He was being so supportive through the whole thing. When it was all over I thanked him for coming. He replied, "Well that's what got us here in the first place!" He's still mad he can't tell anyone his joke. FML

by thatgirl / 06/18/2016 at 5:19pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, my boss brought us some small cakes from a recent trip to China. I opened mine and noticed a little foil packet wrapped with the cake, so I thought it was a powdered topping. I had a couple of bites before my coworker told me it was actually a desiccant to keep the cakes fresh. FML

by drymouth / 06/17/2016 at 7:51pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my therapist told me to write down my goals for the next five years. After thinking hard for what seemed like forever, all I could come up with was getting a girlfriend and having an FML published. And to be honest, I'm not even sure about that first one. FML

by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my 10-year-old son introduced me to Tom, his new best friend, and insisted we have him over to dinner. Tom is a slug. FML

by spadesmollusques / 06/06/2016 at 1:13am / France (Alsace) / Kids

Today, I've been chronically constipated so long that I was actually grateful for the sudden blast of diarrhea that ruined my pants. FML

by Anonymous / 06/01/2016 at 7:05am / Canada (Quebec) / Health

Today, I decided to work on my social anxiety by ordering some food. I waited in line, practicing my order in my head all the way. When I got to the front, I said my order with no mistakes. The cashier just stared blankly at me until I mumbled, "Never mind..." and left. FML

by EyesofStone / 05/31/2016 at 9:03pm / United States / Miscellaneous