Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

natheitz

Online | Search for a member

natheitz

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5599
  • Number of comments : 57
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About natheitz : Hi

natheitz's page activity

Visits<b>tchatfield9413</b> - the 03/30/2015 at 11:25am<b>dapoog124</b> - the 02/10/2015 at 8:51pm<b>adrianvons</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 4:29am<b>paramor3</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 10:26pm<b>Lunarlilly</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 7:58pm<b>steeler088</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 7:23pm<b>nathanislegit</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 6:48pm<b>D26</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 6:24pm<b>schmuckjon79</b> - the 03/20/2014 at 7:04am<b>Chokobolt</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 4:15am<b>Trollx</b> - the 03/05/2014 at 12:13pm<b>Dekat121</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 3:40pm<b>grizzlybear26</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 11:43am<b>Owlnight321</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 4:58pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 3:29pm<b>DeadxTime</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 7:12am<b>edvin</b> - the 02/26/2014 at 1:24am<b>Rcmpbell</b> - the 02/17/2014 at 1:31pm

natheitz's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of natheitz's badges

natheitz's favorite FMLs

Today, my father tried to excuse his alcoholism by saying that his stomach stops working, and he needs to drink vodka to get it started again. FML

Today, I found out my anti-depressants are super-effective. So effective, they affect things they aren't even supposed to. Like my ability to pee. FML

#21401319
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25702) - you deserved it (1970)

On 04/28/2015 at 6:39pm - health - by full bladder - United States (Florida)

Today, due to awkward circumstances, I am living with my ex-girlfriend and her new girlfriend. FML

Today, I was watching porn, and ended up bawling because the girl in the video looked like my ex. FML

#21399752
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29889) - you deserved it (8843)

On 04/26/2015 at 12:05am - intimacy - by montanadinosaur (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

#21399378
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31106) - you deserved it (2491)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:34am - love - by a critically injured shitehawk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I found out the name on my driver's license is incorrect. I don't know what's worse: the fact the government can't even copy a goddamn name correctly, or that it took me three months to notice, when a cop nearly arrested me for carrying a "fake" license. FML

#21399342
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28629) - you deserved it (4452)

On 04/25/2015 at 3:30am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, teachers were pulling students out of class to announce valedictorian, salutatorian, and other awards for graduation. I got pulled out of class by one of them, and I got a little excited since I wasn't expecting an award. It was to tell me that my sister was staying after school. FML

Today, a friendly game of Cards Against Humanity somehow ended in a screaming match, my best friend's mother pulling out her tits, and me getting bit in the foot by a dog. FML

Today, my husband told me he doesn't see the point in trying anymore, and that he no longer loves me. I was devastated. He stayed on the couch while I went to bed. Ten minutes later, he said, "Do you mind? I'm trying to sleep." and asked me to shut up. FML

Today, I got up feeling refreshed and positive for the first time in ages, so I happily threw my window open to greet the beautiful morning. A bee flew into my eye. FML

#21394396
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29643) - you deserved it (2679)

On 04/15/2015 at 10:41pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, while cleaning my desk I found a stray gumball. I quickly popped it into my mouth only to discover with horror that it was a paintball. FML

#21394264
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16543) - you deserved it (32503)

On 04/15/2015 at 6:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML

#21392789
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35418) - you deserved it (2354)

On 04/13/2015 at 5:00am - misc - by yupthissucks - United States (Georgia)

Today, I filled out an online application for a internship. I didn't have all the info I need to complete it, but it wouldn't let me leave anything blank so to move along I filled in crap answers. I pressed "Save". It sent my draft in. I now have to explain that "Jesus" isn't actually my reference. FML

#21392735
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16329) - you deserved it (21561)

On 04/13/2015 at 1:20am - work - by unprofessional - United States (Oregon)

Today, the only way I can get my boyfriend to do anything is by telling him it's a turn on. FML

#21392608
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26825) - you deserved it (3435)

On 04/12/2015 at 9:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I caught my teenage daughter doing her laundry for the first time ever. She had piles of black and white, but then she threw them together in the washing machine. I told her blacks and whites were supposed to be separate, but she just said, "End the segregation, mom." FML

#21392458
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30029) - you deserved it (5458)

On 04/12/2015 at 4:57pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: