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natheitz

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natheitznatheitz
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 9166
  • Number of comments : 61
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About natheitz : Hi

natheitz's page activity

Visits<b>Mons</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:31pm<b>weirdncrazy</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 1:53am<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/08/2016 at 9:23pm<b>samrompain</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 9:19pm<b>joco4</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 1:32pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 11/07/2015 at 5:59pm<b>naw</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 5:00pm<b>cdirick</b> - the 10/25/2015 at 4:42pm<b>FitFriday</b> - the 10/09/2015 at 1:48pm<b>durukanus</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 4:45am<b>jjumprope</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 1:46am<b>Kane322</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 11:43pm<b>Stigorama</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 12:14am<b>uflorida21</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 1:47am<b>Toughsky</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:30pm<b>TimeBandit17</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 5:29pm<b>armyant98</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 1:19pm<b>FuKcMee</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 1:03pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 3:23am<b>FuKcMee</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 7:03pm<b>Matheo</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 4:41pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:53pm<b>tranced_</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 1:20pm

natheitz's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of natheitz's badges

natheitz's favorite FMLs

Today, I scored the number of a cute girl. I gave her mine as well, just before leaving the bar. As I waved her goodbye, I attempted to do a cheesy "call me" gesture with my thumb and pinky finger, and winked. For a reason unknown to me, I ended up flipping her off. I still winked though. FML

by killme.jpeg / 04/17/2016 at 9:04pm / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I started my period almost a week earlier than I expected to. I also happened to be at the beach with a guy that I really liked when it started. He was the one who noticed, and he informed me by saying that we couldn't go back in the water or we would be eaten by sharks. FML

by Unsuspecting / 04/16/2016 at 8:23am / United States / Health

Today, my fiancé's mom was driving me to the store to pick up my wedding dress. A few minutes into the drive, she said the car's tank was nearly out of "Jews" and that she'd have to give it "a whole lotta gas", then chuckled to herself. She's well aware that I'm Jewish. FML

by Anonymous / 04/16/2016 at 2:01am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I lay in bed reflecting on my fiancé's complaint about my lack of displays of affection. I felt terrible, so I rolled over and hugged him in his sleep. He's a fully trained martial artist and his immediate reaction was to try to snap my neck. FML

by bruised / 04/11/2016 at 3:26am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, while working my job as a swim instructor, my coworker sprayed me with the hose. I instinctively held up what I was holding to block the cold water. I was holding a 4 year-old. FML

by humanshield / 04/10/2016 at 12:49pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, the nerves for my finals got so bad that I started stress-cleaning in my dream. FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2016 at 11:26am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I took a girl to a sushi restaurant for our first date. She insisted she's had sushi before, but I had to watch her struggle with the chopsticks for a few minutes before mercifully asking the waitress for a fork. She then ate a fork full of wasabi, thinking it was guacamole. I think there won't be a second date. FML

by John_Elvis / 04/08/2016 at 11:30pm / United States (Indiana) / Love

Today, I discovered that the vitamin I've been taking for hair growth actually works really well. Unfortunately, it only works on my leg hair. FML

by anonymous / 04/03/2016 at 5:50pm / United States (Florida) / Health

Today, it's day 9 of my honeymoon. It's also day 8 of my period and day 7 of food poisoning. FML

by Anonymous / 04/02/2016 at 3:47pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Holidays

Today, I was in the gym waiting for my boyfriend while he played racquetball. I had to listen to old men talk about their prostates for 15 minutes. FML

Today, in my self-defense class, we did an attack simulation. As I began to hit my attacker, my fist hit the top of his helmet, dislocating my shoulder. I then spent the next hour in the ER sobbing until it was popped back in. I need to learn to defend myself against myself. FML

by inpain / 03/17/2016 at 12:56am / United States (California) / Health

Today, at my brother's baseball practice, two 6 year-old girls wanted a piggy back ride. I get this a lot due to my size, so after telling their mom how good I was with kids, I let one get on my back. I then promptly tripped over a puppy and face planted, resulting in a crying child. FML

by toot_toot_turtle / 03/16/2016 at 11:41pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after returning to work from a week-long sickness, I sent out an apologetic email to all of my clients to explain my lack of communication due to absence. I realised afterwards I had put the subject line as 'Absense'. And sent it to all of my clients. FML

by absense / 03/16/2016 at 3:43am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, I forgot my phone on the roof of my car. I took a 30 minute drive from my friend's city to my city. I got on to my driveway, surprised to see my phone still there. Thinking I'm really lucky, I pick up my phone. Then, I trip over a pebble, cracking my phone in the process. FML

by Anonymous / 03/11/2016 at 7:20am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, I introduced my kind and amazing Iranian boyfriend to my mother. When he went to use the rest room, she warned me to "knock it off with this Bin Laden fetish" or she'll have me put on psychiatric hold. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2016 at 1:58am / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Love