About nanner42 : I like to write and have fun...and apparently my life is so boring that I never have any FML's happen D:
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Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
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nanner42's favorite FMLs
Today, I went to see my new dentist. He was really cute, so after the checkup I started flirting. He stopped me right after I asked him out, saying, "Being a dentist has its advantages, I can see the girl's mouth before I stick my tongue in it. And in your case, it's a big no." FML
by black and yellow / 01/21/2013 at 1:32am / United States (California) / Love
Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a slap and then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML
by dormeur / 01/18/2013 at 6:39am / Animals
by EmberLove / 01/17/2013 at 9:06am / United States / Love
Today, my teenage son taught my five-year-old daughter how to fake her own death. I walked into the kitchen today to find her lying still on the floor, covered in ketchup. She laughed when I began to scream. FML
by Nightmare / 01/15/2013 at 9:41am / Kids
by frustrated / 01/13/2013 at 1:39am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/12/2013 at 12:57pm / Norway (Rogaland) / Love
Today, I started charging my phone in the car during a family road trip. The car recognized my iPhone as an MP3 player and started playing the audio from the porn video I watched before we left. Everybody heard. FML
by anonymous / 01/05/2013 at 11:16am / United States / Transportation
by marisa / 01/04/2013 at 7:31pm / Ireland (Carlow) / Love
by ashbeat / 01/01/2013 at 10:20am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/30/2012 at 9:45pm / United States (Maryland) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/27/2012 at 11:31pm / United States / Love
by DarkDisaster / 12/27/2012 at 5:16am / United States / Animals
by FuckMyEyes / 12/25/2012 at 8:49pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy
by Chanman1924 / 12/24/2012 at 4:06pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I received a package from a local guy on Craigslist. Instead of the iPhone I paid $350 for, the box only contained a photo of an iPhone. The guy had been dumb enough to attach a return address, so my husband went over and beat the shit out of him. I now have to bail him out of jail. FML
by Anonymous / 12/23/2012 at 12:52pm / United States (Maryland) / Money