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nadnerbz

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nadnerbz

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 2237
  • Number of comments : 69
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>ShadowlessSpear</b> - the 12/21/2014 at 1:49pm<b>BassTurdo</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 6:31pm<b>neonvortex</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 8:40am<b>nerdfightastical</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 10:34pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 7:52am<b>Sael</b> - the 06/09/2013 at 4:01pm<b>OlgaCornmuffin</b> - the 03/28/2013 at 6:26pm<b>Disobey</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 7:37pm<b>Chuffberry</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 12:51pm<b>LovesSushi</b> - the 02/16/2013 at 10:36am<b>omerdaywalker</b> - the 12/27/2012 at 6:14am<b>expelleduser</b> - the 12/26/2012 at 5:16pm<b>DespairFaction</b> - the 06/25/2012 at 1:49am<b>kiwienne</b> - the 06/23/2012 at 2:40pm

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nadnerbz's favorite FMLs

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40999) - you deserved it (8457)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

#7212033
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34707) - you deserved it (2933)

On 01/08/2010 at 2:23am - kids - by PeanutlyDisabled - France

Today, my boyfriend called me 80 times in 5 minutes. I had previously told him I was with my friends. He left me a voicemail proposing saying he loved me to death and he was crying. We've been dating for a week. FML

#6999302
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38858) - you deserved it (4475)

On 12/28/2009 at 8:21pm - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I came home from a year long backpacking trip in Europe. During my absence my parents divorced, dad took the house and most of the money, sister is seven months pregnant, brother was arrested for statutory rape, and my mom pawned all my stuff to buy booze to "cope." Oh, and my fish died. FML

#6989911
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86887) - you deserved it (4963)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I came home from a year long backpacking trip in Europe. During my absence my parents divorced, dad took the house and most of the money, sister is seven months pregnant, brother was arrested for statutory rape, and my mom pawned all my stuff to buy booze to "cope." Oh, and my fish died. FML

#6989911
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (86887) - you deserved it (4963)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I tried to be sexy and put a condom on with my mouth. Instead, I inhaled it and my boyfriend broke three of my ribs giving me the Heimlich maneuver. FML

#4155124
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22565) - you deserved it (55006)

On 07/30/2009 at 5:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was peeing in a urinal at a bar. A drunk guy comes in, and seeing no urinals open, he decides to pee between my legs from behind me. He didn't have good aim. FML

#4081805
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63665) - you deserved it (3251)

On 07/27/2009 at 3:07pm - misc - by webperson04 (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my cousin and I found out that when a girl puts a flower in the right side of her hair, it means she's available. The bigger the flower, the more available she is. My eleven year old boy cousin told me to cut down a palm tree and put it in my hair. FML

#2671287
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67789) - you deserved it (6891)

On 06/06/2009 at 8:38pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was eating cereal and decided to warm it up to see what it tasted like. So, using a candle in the room I placed my spoon over the flame and waited to see if it heated up. Pleased with my silly experiment, I put the spoon back in my mouth. I now can't talk because of my swollen tongue. FML

#1416648
369 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23056) - you deserved it (233664)

On 04/28/2009 at 7:16am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML

#960425
702 comments

I agree, your life sucks (731869) - you deserved it (56624)

On 04/13/2009 at 10:11pm - health - by meteorbabe0101 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, to ask a boy I really liked to my school's turnabout dance, I gave him a box full of 10 cupcakes that spelled out T-U-R-N-A-B-O-U-T-?. The boy gave the box back a little later. There were two cupcakes left inside. It said N-O. FML

#152949
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99290) - you deserved it (10727)

On 02/27/2009 at 2:35pm - misc - by justanaccount (woman) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

#56665
512 comments

I agree, your life sucks (242053) - you deserved it (82319)

On 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm - kids - by offbeans (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was taking the elevator down with a group of people. It stopped on the 2nd floor and I said "What asshole can't take the steps from the 2nd floor?" Then a kid in a wheelchair got on. FML

#6517
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7094) - you deserved it (48994)

On 02/03/2009 at 3:30pm - misc - by j0natron (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)



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