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museerux01

Offline (the 03/04/2014 at 8:01pm) | Search for a member

museerux01

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 424
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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museerux01's page activity

Visits<b>benfagan</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 12:36am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 09/02/2013 at 11:52pm

museerux01's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of museerux01's badges

museerux01's favorite FMLs

Today, my family and I were having turkey for dinner. My boyfriend leaned in towards me and muttered, "I'll stuff your turkey later". Everyone heard and the whole room went dead silent. FML

Today, my girlfriend and I finally watched Toy Story 3; I ended up crying when the toys almost die. After the movie, my girlfriend broke up with me because I embarrassed her. FML

#20982712
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45655) - you deserved it (11645)

On 12/06/2013 at 11:13am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I dropped a $400 bottle of wine while trying to get the cork out. FML

#20982484
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44932) - you deserved it (17208)

On 12/06/2013 at 2:08am - money - by butterfingers - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had sex with my boyfriend for the first time. It was also the first time he'd ever had sex. How could I tell? He cried all the way through, and called his parents right after. FML

#20974515
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60137) - you deserved it (6570)

On 11/29/2013 at 6:56am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

#20963410
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59844) - you deserved it (9072)

On 11/19/2013 at 2:46pm - intimacy - by oops999 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got into a fight with a lawn chair. It won. FML

#20961117
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31188) - you deserved it (11649)

On 11/17/2013 at 5:07pm - misc - by what_a_loner - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I walked into my dorm room, only to witness my roommate shaving her vag over my trashcan. FML

#20950523
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49958) - you deserved it (4083)

On 11/08/2013 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by JN5SLK (woman) - United States (Utah)

Today, I had a panic attack when a huge spider ran over my hand. I screamed, wailed, and killed it with a shoe while shouting. Ten minutes later, police slammed on my door. My neighbor called them, saying it sounded like someone was being murdered. FML

#20943397
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42719) - you deserved it (7655)

On 11/03/2013 at 2:34am - animals - by katchoo (woman) - Denmark

Today, while driving in the car with my father, he handed me his iPhone and asked me to Google "Is ObamaCare good for our country?" As soon as I typed in "Is", the first result was "Is olive oil good for anal." FML

#20942318
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59389) - you deserved it (5651)

On 11/02/2013 at 9:21am - intimacy - by justme - United States (Ohio)

Today, while working customer service, I instructed a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitated a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" FML

#20941322
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43993) - you deserved it (4101)

On 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm - work - by #isthisthepoundkey? - United States (Florida)

Today, I'm severely sunburned and can barely walk properly. My boyfriend keeps telling his friends that it's because of "how hard he gave it to me last night". FML

#20936372
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55879) - you deserved it (9722)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:51am - intimacy - by snowwhite (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend told me how jealous he gets when I "hang out" with Dylan. Dylan is the 5-year-old boy whom I babysit every day. My boyfriend wants me to stop, because apparently Dylan cockblocks him. FML

#20933884
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46353) - you deserved it (5097)

On 10/25/2013 at 8:49pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realised it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML

#20929016
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53311) - you deserved it (3931)

On 10/21/2013 at 3:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, my father was taking pictures of my friend and me as we got ready for homecoming. After the pictures were taken, he offered to show us. He scrolled one picture too far and ended up showing us a picture of his penis. FML

#20927261
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63240) - you deserved it (4879)

On 10/20/2013 at 9:02am - intimacy - by Female_Lucifer (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was hanging out with a guy I like. We climbed a tree to watch the sunset, and as the sun went down, I kissed him. He fell out of the tree. FML

#20920034
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51161) - you deserved it (5825)

On 10/14/2013 at 12:02pm - love - by lovehurts - United States (Pennsylvania)



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