msmidnight1965

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msmidnight1965

3Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 January 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1557
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

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msmidnight1965's page activity

Visits<b>clines42</b> - the 10/23/2016 at 5:45pm<b>Fluffyturtle21</b> - the 09/09/2016 at 4:13pm<b>wellthisisntgood</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 2:41pm<b>That1One1Chick</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 11:55pm<b>Sunflora219</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 10:24pm<b>dada124</b> - the 03/14/2016 at 2:25pm<b>silkyred</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 4:52pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 10:45am<b>arauzfernando1</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 11:53am<b>dno79</b> - the 02/20/2016 at 6:02am<b>HairyPunisher</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 4:27pm<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 3:27pm<b>boricualuv</b> - the 02/01/2016 at 10:33pm<b>hoesandfuckboys</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 12:55am<b>CreepinCow</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 8:32pm<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 6:51pm<b>Capriciousfox</b> - the 12/30/2015 at 9:26pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 8:14pm

Fucked!<b>HairyPunisher</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 10:27pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 12/27/2015 at 2:14am<b>NoOrdinaryNZer</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 8:22pm

msmidnight1965's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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msmidnight1965's favorite FMLs

Today, my gynecologist was having trouble with my exam due to me being "too tight." I'm 24. After the explanation of having been pretty inactive in over a year, she exclaimed, "Damn, girl, we really need to find you a boyfriend!" Yeah, tell me about it. FML

by miss cranky pants / 10/30/2010 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was at the beach with my parents. They were walking hand in hand, when they spotted a crab. My Dad turned to my Mum and said "Oh, must've crawled out of my pubes!" they both laughed and kissed. I don't think they realized I was within hearing distance. FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2010 at 9:12am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend got scared of a fly, freaked out, and accidentally punched me in the face. FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2010 at 12:25am / United States (North Dakota) / Love

Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML

by maebyf / 08/31/2010 at 10:48am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I found a pile of animal skeletons scattered in my backyard. It appears that last night, mother nature decided to rain so hard, that the graves of my childhood pets floated back up to the top, and covered half of my field. I now have to pick all of it up before my dog sees them. FML

by L.Lime05 / 08/08/2010 at 7:27pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

by Embarressed... / 08/04/2010 at 6:25am / United Kingdom (Derbyshire) / Intimacy

Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML

by dancerr2210 / 06/09/2010 at 12:01am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I was t-boned by a car that sent mine flying into five parked cars. My car was totalled. As the person who hit me pulled me out of the right side of the car he said, "Sorry. I sneezed." FML

by A. Person / 04/07/2010 at 1:36am / Mexico (Sonora) / Transportation

Today, I tried an herbal tea that is supposed to increase your milk supply (I'm a breastfeeding mom). Well, it worked, and it kicked in at my office, but only on one side. So when I went into the bathroom, I noticed I had one boob WAY higher and bigger than the other. Great. FML

by mama75 / 03/17/2010 at 10:18am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Work

Today, the water in my shower wouldn't drain so I used a snake to unclog it. I pulled almost a full foot of nasty hair and gunk out of the drain. I just moved in, and the previous owner was an elderly woman. I just pulled a foot of old lady pubes out of my drain. FML

by please_no / 03/16/2010 at 10:40am / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML

by hiii. / 03/15/2010 at 10:27pm / United States (Indiana) / Geek

Today, after puking all over the bathroom and my legs, I called my husband for sympathy. The first thing he says is "Did you cry?" and when I answered no, instead of wishing me better he quickly exclaimed "WHO'S MY BIG GIRL!" FML

by gotitEVERYWHERE / 03/08/2010 at 5:40pm / United States (Georgia) / Health

Today, it snowed in South Carolina for the first time in 10 years. It snowed eight whole inches! I was so excited, I yelled for my kids and ran outside to build a snowman. I ran out to the steps and slipped on ice. I woke up in the hospital with a bad concussion. The snow had all melted. FML

by owwie / 02/13/2010 at 3:11pm / United States / Kids

Today, I took a picture of my "privates" on my girlfriends cell phone and set it as her background without her knowing. Minutes later, I heard her mom scream. She has the same phone. FML

by masterzach21 / 01/22/2010 at 1:25am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, as I showered, I sneezed, hit my face on the wall, got shampoo in my eyes, slipped on a bar of soap, bashed my head on the wall as I fell, grabbed at the walls to stop me from falling and happened to turn off the cold water, scorching me. FML

by Concussed / 01/17/2010 at 1:22am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health