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msmidnight1965

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msmidnight1965
  • Town/Country : Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 January 1996 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 668
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

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msmidnight1965's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

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msmidnight1965's favorite FMLs

Today, while setting up for a party I was having, I put black lights into our bathroom for the cool bright, neon color you get when you pee. When I turn them on to see where I need to continue cleaning, I see many, small, yellow hand prints on the walls. I have a nine year old brother. FML

#13660294
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20118) - you deserved it (2572)

On 10/31/2010 at 5:05am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my gynecologist was having trouble with my exam due to me being "too tight." I'm 24. After the explanation of having been pretty inactive in over a year, she exclaimed, "Damn, girl, we really need to find you a boyfriend!" Yeah, tell me about it. FML

#13645148
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29527) - you deserved it (3919)

On 10/30/2010 at 1:03am - intimacy - by miss cranky pants - United States (California)

Today, I was at the beach with my parents. They were walking hand in hand, when they spotted a crab. My Dad turned to my Mum and said "Oh, must've crawled out of my pubes!" they both laughed and kissed. I don't think they realized I was within hearing distance. FML

#13287262
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25873) - you deserved it (2895)

On 10/02/2010 at 9:12am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend got scared of a fly, freaked out, and accidentally punched me in the face. FML

#12926482
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24184) - you deserved it (3437)

On 09/06/2010 at 12:25am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Dakota)

Today, my boyfriend of three years proposed to me. He brought me to our favorite restaurant and ordered expensive champagne. It was all very romantic, until he got on one knee and I farted out of surprise. Loudly. FML

#12837026
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36156) - you deserved it (7382)

On 08/31/2010 at 10:48am - love - by maebyf - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found a pile of animal skeletons scattered in my backyard. It appears that last night, mother nature decided to rain so hard, that the graves of my childhood pets floated back up to the top, and covered half of my field. I now have to pick all of it up before my dog sees them. FML

#12396014
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30993) - you deserved it (3216)

On 08/08/2010 at 7:27pm - animals - by L.Lime05 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

#12305756
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35250) - you deserved it (9880)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, after making out with my boyfriend for the first time, it took me an hour to convince him he was still a virgin. FML

#11070143
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44113) - you deserved it (6050)

On 06/09/2010 at 12:01am - intimacy - by dancerr2210 - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was t-boned by a car that sent mine flying into five parked cars. My car was totalled. As the person who hit me pulled me out of the right side of the car he said, "Sorry. I sneezed." FML

#9697078
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27827) - you deserved it (1763)

On 04/07/2010 at 1:36am - misc - by A. Person - Mexico (Sonora)

Today, I tried an herbal tea that is supposed to increase your milk supply (I'm a breastfeeding mom). Well, it worked, and it kicked in at my office, but only on one side. So when I went into the bathroom, I noticed I had one boob WAY higher and bigger than the other. Great. FML

#9156670
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23921) - you deserved it (4242)

On 03/17/2010 at 10:18am - work - by mama75 (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, the water in my shower wouldn't drain so I used a snake to unclog it. I pulled almost a full foot of nasty hair and gunk out of the drain. I just moved in, and the previous owner was an elderly woman. I just pulled a foot of old lady pubes out of my drain. FML

#9129175
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27876) - you deserved it (2194)

On 03/16/2010 at 10:40am - misc - by please_no (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was so bored I googled the word "bored." The results were boring. FML

#9117281
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8558) - you deserved it (34176)

On 03/15/2010 at 10:27pm - misc - by hiii. (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, after puking all over the bathroom and my legs, I called my husband for sympathy. The first thing he says is "Did you cry?" and when I answered no, instead of wishing me better he quickly exclaimed "WHO'S MY BIG GIRL!" FML

#8923957
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18062) - you deserved it (5841)

On 03/08/2010 at 5:40pm - health - by gotitEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, it snowed in South Carolina for the first time in 10 years. It snowed eight whole inches! I was so excited, I yelled for my kids and ran outside to build a snowman. I ran out to the steps and slipped on ice. I woke up in the hospital with a bad concussion. The snow had all melted. FML

#8210549
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27951) - you deserved it (5060)

On 02/13/2010 at 3:11pm - kids - by owwie - United States

Today, I took a picture of my "privates" on my girlfriends cell phone and set it as her background without her knowing. Minutes later, I heard her mom scream. She has the same phone. FML

#7492476
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6579) - you deserved it (31875)

On 01/22/2010 at 1:25am - intimacy - by masterzach21 (man) - United States (Michigan)



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