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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 5 January 1996 (19 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1240
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 21 posted

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msmidnight1965's page activity

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msmidnight1965's FML badges

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.


You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…


You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

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msmidnight1965's favorite FMLs

Today, I finished a big art project. It was a self-portrait done in acrylics. Proud of my piece, I showed my mom. After some thought her first comment was, "well, I'm either going to insult your art or your face." FML


I agree, your life sucks (48028) - you deserved it (4752)

On 06/01/2013 at 7:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I got so lonely I decided to make sock puppets and play with them. I played for four hours straight, only to be interrupted by a phone call. I didn't answer because my sock puppets were "on a date" and I didn't want to stop playing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33663) - you deserved it (21316)

On 02/02/2013 at 7:08am - misc - by ineedalife (woman) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. I felt down, so I laid in bed and told my parents I needed some alone time. A couple of minutes later, one of them started blasting "All by Myself" so loud that I felt the floorboards vibrate. FML


I agree, your life sucks (37716) - you deserved it (4107)

On 12/25/2012 at 12:00am - love - by all by myself - United States (Alaska)

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (43533) - you deserved it (6116)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I brought a fluorescent tube to the store to make sure I got the correct replacement. Trying to charm the sexy cashier, I waved the tube in the air, saying "I need a new light sabre, there is no force left in this one and the Empire is attacking." Turns out she'd never heard of Star Wars. FML


Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML


I agree, your life sucks (64412) - you deserved it (3462)

On 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm - intimacy - by identitychangeplease - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my mum found out she's pregnant. I would be happy for her, if she knew who the father was. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27135) - you deserved it (1953)

On 09/06/2012 at 6:21pm - health - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my dog farted so loud in his sleep that he scared himself and woke up barking. This afternoon I achieved the same feat. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22418) - you deserved it (3725)

On 08/09/2012 at 10:26am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was changing my son's diaper when he said "Momma." Astonished that he'd finally spoken, I clapped and smiled proudly. My clap scared the crap out of him. Literally. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24921) - you deserved it (4931)

On 08/05/2012 at 9:10pm - kids - by milf - United States (Indiana)

Today, after waking up, I went into the kitchen and took a swig of milk from the carton. I overestimated my strength, and the whole thing splashed all over my face. A few moments later, my dad staggered in, looked at me in disgust, and said, "You know what? I don't even wanna know." FML


I agree, your life sucks (19909) - you deserved it (10420)

On 08/03/2012 at 3:28pm - misc - by squeltorey (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came out to my mom as a lesbian. She told me that it was impossible, because since she isn't one, she therefore couldn't have given birth to one. She still won't believe me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29222) - you deserved it (3828)

On 07/26/2012 at 1:04am - misc - by Just Me (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my wife stabbed my hand with a fork, making it bleed. I'd only tried to take some fries from her plate. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20079) - you deserved it (34029) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 05/08/2012 at 11:48pm - misc - by Mouhahaa (man) - France

Today, I went on a picnic with my boyfriend's family. I thought it would be nice to wear my sundress and cowgirl boots. The wind repeatedly picked up my dress in front of everyone, including my boyfriend's seedy grandpa, who I have to admit can do a pretty good wolf-whistle. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22865) - you deserved it (6589)

On 05/02/2012 at 2:34pm - misc - by EyeSeeYou (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I somehow managed to hit my head on a first aid kit. I now have a cut on my forehead and my boyfriend just keeps laughing from the irony. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22304) - you deserved it (3957)

On 04/18/2012 at 4:18pm - health - by 352 - United States

Today, my husband told me to stop faking being sick, because, "morning sickness doesn't happen after noon." FML


I agree, your life sucks (30951) - you deserved it (3004)

On 04/13/2012 at 10:15am - love - by prego - United States (Michigan)

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