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mrjamjama66

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mrjamjama66
  • Town/Country : Townsville , USA
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 208
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 44 posted

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mrjamjama66's favorite FMLs

Today, a week after moving into my new house, I'm seriously considering suing the previous occupant. He failed to mention how the neighbor has his own band and rehearses every other day until 2am. Their music is so bad, it sounds like the wailing of a cat being tortured to death. FML

#21105113
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33567) - you deserved it (4514)

On 04/05/2014 at 11:27am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out that the squeaking I've heard for the past three months, that I thought was my guinea pig, is actually my girlfriend cheating on me with my older brother. FML

#21105078
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52488) - you deserved it (4805)

On 04/05/2014 at 10:27am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend wanted me to get a shirt saying "I'm a girl," just so people won't think he's gay. FML

#21104753
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34757) - you deserved it (4889)

On 04/04/2014 at 9:57pm - misc - by Violet (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, my mom visited, and I left her for a few minutes while I used the bathroom. While I was stuck taking a crap, she went on one of her religious rants, telling my children that Easter was off this year because their precious "pagan" Easter Bunny had been murdered. FML

#21104621
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33121) - you deserved it (3171)

On 04/04/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by kaheera4 (woman) - United States

Today, I got up early in the morning to get a snack, only to walk in on my "vegan" housemate eating a turkey sandwich. This bastard harasses me every other day about my meat-eating, but all he could do after he noticed me was drop the sandwich and claim he'd been sleepwalking. FML

#21104594
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35722) - you deserved it (2709)

On 04/04/2014 at 6:07pm - misc - by fuck you with a bacon cock (man) - United Kingdom (Moray)

Today, I went to the store to buy a phone I saw last week. I looked around a little first, then continued to the electronics section. I couldn't find the phone I saw, so I went to leave. Halfway to the exit, I was detained by security and grilled for ages over my "suspicious behaviour". FML

#21104459
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32560) - you deserved it (2903)

On 04/04/2014 at 3:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was supervising a written exam, which took place in a really warm room. Half of the two hundred participants has probably never heard of deodorants. The other half used probably the whole can this morning. I had to stay in this inferno of stench for five hours. FML

#21103838
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34778) - you deserved it (3037)

On 04/03/2014 at 5:48pm - work - by RIP_Nose (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I was watching TV with my husband, and he started getting frisky. When the commercial break started, we started having sex. When he came, there were still two commercials left before the show resumed. FML

#21011750
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46346) - you deserved it (4774)

On 12/31/2013 at 4:19pm - intimacy - by erjazo (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was searched and questioned at the airport for having an apple. FML

#20971832
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36759) - you deserved it (4110)

On 11/26/2013 at 9:39pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML

#20971273
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35472) - you deserved it (2745)

On 11/26/2013 at 11:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at the grocery store, when a little boy looked up at me and asked if I was a prostitute. FML

#20970235
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39514) - you deserved it (11466)

On 11/25/2013 at 2:47pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was quite drunk so I decided to take a piss kneeling down, so I wouldn't miss. I dropped the toilet seat on my little soldier. FML

Today, my boyfriend announced to me he was sleeping with another girl via alphabet soup. FML

#20968871
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41716) - you deserved it (3143)

On 11/24/2013 at 11:01am - love - by fries - United States (New York)

Today, I discovered that my heart rate is higher while playing Tetris than it is during sex. FML

#20968767
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35743) - you deserved it (5248)

On 11/24/2013 at 7:30am - misc - by TetrisMaster - Australia

Today, after having my sinuses draining for a couple days, my ma stopped by for a surprise visit. Upon discovering the trash can full of used tissues, she called my pastor grandfather to talk to me about the chronic masturbation problem I don't have, but that everyone now thinks I have. FML



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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