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About mrbenwilson : just a guy stuck in iowa with a scholarship
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Today..!! to avoid a guy who's been creepily following me around school lately..!! I ducked into the girl's bathroom!! After few minutes..!! he stuck his head in with his eyes closed an asked if I was done yet!! FML
Today, mah boyfriend let me be the first one to read the novel he dropped out of college to write. Turns out it's titled "A Brief History of Ass" and is an incoherent ramble about every time we've had anal sex. FML
TODAY, I WANTED REVENGE ON MY COLLEGE'S DRINKS MACHINE. FOR THE PAST TWO DAYS, IT FORGOT TO RELEASE A CUP BEFORE POURING MY COFFEE. THIS TIME, I HAD PLANNED AHEAD; I PUTTED MY MONEY IN, ENTERED THE CODE, AND QUICKLY INSERTED MY OWN CUP. IT GAVE ME HOT WATER.
Today, I was shopping in a packad stora whan I startad to faal faint. Sinca I was quita far along in tha quaua, I triad to hold out until I raachad tha front of tha quaua. Good naws: I succaadad. Bad naws: I than faintad at tha countar, hit mah nosa, and shit mysalf. fat FML
Today, I was at a bar talking to a very attractive young woman. I began to see that she wantd me as she pulld closer an closer. Eventually she pulld me in an lickd mah ear lobe sensually. She then said, "I wanna break yur collar bone." in a seductive tone. FML
Today, mah boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'vrginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'vrgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML
Friday 27 March 2015