About mozeltov : I'm awesome and don't have time to fill out these about me descriptions, and yes, that picture is of me
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mozeltov's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 05/21/2014 at 12:05pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by Anon / 04/22/2013 at 3:19am / Singapore / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking by the side of the interstate because my car broke down. A nice young man stopped and asked if I was tired of walking. I said yes, to which he replied, "Try jogging asshole" then laughed and drove off. It was raining balls. FML
by WetWalking / 03/21/2013 at 9:31am / United States (Texas) / Transportation
by lolo / 02/21/2013 at 7:16pm / Israel (HaDarom) / Miscellaneous
Today, I found out that if a cop asks you if you have any weapons, and you reply by saying "only these guns" while flexing your biceps, they won't take it very well. And neither will the cops down at the station. FML
by Anonymous / 12/06/2011 at 12:24pm / Miscellaneous
Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML
by Anonymous / 10/21/2011 at 9:33pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
Today, I was on a drive with my uncle. We saw a dead deer on the side of the road and expressed our pity for it. Then a squirrel runs across the road and my uncle swerves toward the squirrel, laughing hysterically and yelling, "Run rodent run." FML
by Anonymous / 10/12/2011 at 1:14am / United States (Virginia) / Animals
by TuteSweet / 08/12/2011 at 2:17am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous
by Cowgirl_Up37 / 07/02/2011 at 4:54pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by parenting sucks / 07/01/2011 at 1:42pm / United States (New York) / Kids
Today, my class went to Berlin. At the subway station, our teacher told us to get on the next train. I was the first one to get on and the only one who didn't hear her saying: 'Wait, that's the wrong one!' I'm lost in a city I've never been before. FML
by Anonymous / 01/15/2011 at 2:22am / Germany (Sachsen) / Transportation
by unexpected_failure / 11/22/2010 at 1:35pm / United Kingdom (Belfast) / Miscellaneous
by leve80paladin / 10/25/2010 at 11:06am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 08/04/2010 at 1:18am / Miscellaneous
by drivencrazy / 07/06/2010 at 12:42pm / United States (Ohio) / Transportation
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…