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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10150
  • Number of comments : 37
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 27 posted

About mordecaiandrigby : Hi, I'm an opinionated person. Although I'm usually nice, I'm pretty sarcastic. Judging my number of unconfirmed FMLs, apparently my life sucks, but not enough to get an FML confirmed.

mordecaiandrigby's page activity

Visits<b>vreid</b> - the 10/14/2016 at 11:10pm<b>Steve95401</b> - the 07/20/2016 at 7:35pm<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 4:37pm<b>Delsanity</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 1:19am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 2:11am<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 2:42pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 10/29/2015 at 9:27pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 09/11/2015 at 6:36pm<b>BlackSmurf92</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 11:10pm<b>Yazoo77</b> - the 07/28/2015 at 3:06am<b>pokysmalls</b> - the 07/22/2015 at 3:45pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 06/09/2015 at 7:27am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 5:19pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 12:43am<b>princesshulkk</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 12:13pm<b>toaster87</b> - the 04/04/2015 at 5:20pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 12:56am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 10:58pm

Fucked!<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 6:10pm<b>_kyleG_</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 6:57am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 03/29/2015 at 4:59am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 3:44am<b>Delsanity</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 4:45am

mordecaiandrigby's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

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You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.


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mordecaiandrigby's favorite FMLs

Today, I held a door open for a sweet old lady with a walker. After she went through the door, she turned and said, "That's not how you're gonna get into my pants, son." FML

by Keastwood013 / 01/18/2013 at 10:25am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, marks the sixth day in a row that my mum has called me to discuss my upcoming wedding. She's obsessed and has intimidated the actual planner I hired into going along with her plans. She's slipped up twice already and accidentally referred to it as her own wedding. Just great. FML

by fuck you, mum / 01/11/2013 at 5:19pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, my hamster died. It climbed out of its cage and jumped off my dresser. Looking for condolences, I told my mom who replied, "If I lived in your room, I would have done it earlier." FML

by deadhammy / 01/11/2013 at 2:09am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML

by lovingthis / 01/09/2013 at 11:48am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, within the first 15 minutes of a nonstop 8-hour flight, the guy sitting next to me picked an eyelash he found on my face, stared at it for a few seconds, and stuck it in his mouth. FML

by legitweirdo / 01/07/2013 at 11:16pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancé decided he wants a baby only because our dog is good, quiet, and falls asleep as soon as he starts to cradle her. He thinks a baby will be just like that. FML

by Twiggysucks68 / 01/06/2013 at 8:49pm / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

by WellShit / 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, while at the store with my mom and baby brother, a guy started to talk to me. Just as he went to give me his number, my mom handed me my brother and said, "Here's your son, your AA meeting's in an hour, let's go." FML

by Anonymous / 12/26/2012 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, as her parents were supposed to be out of town, I stayed over with my girlfriend, and we ended up in bed together. Later on, while poking through the fridge, I heard footsteps, so I said, "Didn't think you'd be walking after that." I closed the fridge and saw her dad. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 1:02pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. I was getting pretty horny, and I thought some dirty talk would turn him on. Amid my panting, I breathed the words, "Fuck me." He then stopped and said, "Excuse me, I don't like hearing that language." and wouldn't continue until I corrected myself. FML

by Anonymous / 12/24/2012 at 8:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

by orgasmicriding / 12/22/2012 at 5:55pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend told me his Christmas gift to me was custom made. I told my parents in excitement, thinking it could possibly be a ring. Half an hour later he told me what it was; a molded dildo of his penis. It's going to be an awkward conversation with my parents when they ask what I got. FML

by djl / 12/20/2012 at 12:30am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I had been trying to text my girlfriend all day, but no reply. After a while, I became worried so I called. She picked up and said, "Can't talk, busy." Not even a minute later, my best friend says to me, "Dude, tell your girlfriend to leave me alone. She's been texting me all day." FML

by SugarMyBalls / 12/19/2012 at 6:31pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I have a very uncomfortable cyst in my armpit and a sprained ankle both on my right side, resulting in me limping and keeping my arm awkwardly plastered to my side. My fiancé keeps walking like me and calling me Igor, saying "Yes, Master" whenever I ask him for something. FML

by Igor / 12/19/2012 at 12:16am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health

Today, I noticed one of my neighbors has decided to place an old toilet in the middle of their front lawn. Another one has had a kitchen sink in their driveway for a year, and yet another has a sofa in their grass. These are the people who taunt me for just walking my cat outside on a leash. FML

by SApprentice / 12/19/2012 at 12:02am / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.