monkeyspark

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monkeyspark

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10559
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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monkeyspark's page activity

Visits<b>AHzulu</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 6:04am<b>saucybugger101</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 5:11pm<b>keirachuter</b> - the 08/14/2015 at 12:54pm<b>KitchKraft</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 10:13pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/05/2015 at 5:06pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 6:03pm<b>StevoKing666</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 2:32pm<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 11:03pm<b>sleepisweak</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 6:20am<b>oops6663</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 9:53am<b>anormalperson</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 2:46am<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 5:04am<b>PePziNL</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 11:57am<b>lambda</b> - the 02/01/2014 at 3:47am<b>Waspinator1998</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 1:16am<b>vanessuhm</b> - the 01/27/2014 at 1:04pm<b>Spartancjm</b> - the 12/08/2013 at 3:16am<b>NickPowers55</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 11:55pm

Fucked!<b>AHzulu</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 11:04am<b>KitchKraft</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 4:13am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 10:18pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 11:04am

monkeyspark's FML badges

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of monkeyspark's badges

monkeyspark's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my new college room-mate. He then introduced me to his imaginary friend. FML

by Anonymous / 01/18/2010 at 7:01pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, while babysitting a six year old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his pants/undies and pointed to his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML

by Michele / 01/17/2010 at 7:32pm / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, my grandma told me to fuck off when I tried to help her with the dishes. FML

by volleyballgirl12 / 01/17/2010 at 1:31am / Love

Today, my boyfriend took me to meet his friends at one of his exclusive "clubs." Expecting it to be his old friends from college, I agreed to go. Apparently, I've been dating a member of the Ku Klux Klan for 2 years. FML

by Awkward / 01/16/2010 at 4:24pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML

by dire-rear / 01/16/2010 at 3:19pm / Singapore / Health

Today, I found out that last summer while my girlfriend worked on a Disney Cruise ship, she cheated on me with Tarzan. FML

by daragnan / 01/10/2010 at 4:47pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was babysitting a new child. I guess she heard me tell her parents about my severe peanut allergy because she got a jar out of the pantry, spread it all over the stairs leading to where her fort was, and walked around with a baseball bat covered in it so I couldn't come near her. FML

by PeanutlyDisabled / 01/08/2010 at 2:23am / France / Kids

Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML

by Soresack / 01/04/2010 at 8:34am / United States (Arizona) / Health

Today, after breaking up with my girlfriend of two years over the phone, I recieved a knock on my door. It was my now ex-girlfriend who came to seek revenge by shooting me in the balls with a paintball gun at about a three foot range. FML

by lovehurts / 12/28/2009 at 3:41pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, my girlfriend left me for my sister. I can't stop thinking about all those days they went out alone for "girl time." FML

by notgoodenough38 / 12/27/2009 at 5:34pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, I was driving in the car with my boyfriend and he couldn't keep his hands off me. Nothing to complain about when your boyfriend likes to touch you, right? Except when he keeps smacking your jiggly thighs to watch the ripples and 'tenderize the pork chops'. FML

by porkythighs / 12/27/2009 at 9:19am / Singapore / Love

Today, I have been stuck in the bathroom. Apparently, my 8 year old son decided to sneak in some TurboLax into the juice we left out for Santa. Well played son. FML

by BathroomMuch / 12/25/2009 at 11:15am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I took a friend home from the hospital. She was on medication that made her drowsy. She fell onto her bed and asked me to help her take off some clothes since she had her winter gear on. She passes out and her roommate walks in and catches me undressing an unconscious girl. FML

by Nemesis2747 / 12/24/2009 at 1:09am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, my boyfriend bought me a voice personalized build-a-bear. I thought he was going to propose to me through it, only to press the foot of the bear and hear "we should break up" instead. FML

by samgonzalessb / 12/14/2009 at 12:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up and looked in the mirror and noticed that my face was covered in glitter. I asked my wife about it and she said she put it on me while I was sleeping so that I would sparkle like Edward from Twilight when I'm in the sunlight. FML

by IB6UB9 / 11/28/2009 at 12:32pm / United States / Love