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About mollyjynxjax : Hey! Hi! Hello! How's it going? I'm Morgz, and I love movies, tv, video games, and the internet. Hit me up if you want to chat :)
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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Today , I went to break up with mah psychotic bitch of a grlfriend after month of abuse. When she opened the door , her 5-year-old son ran up to me , smiling an calling me ( DADDY! ) 4 the frst time. Now I don't have the heart to dump the psycho an devastate her son. FML
Today mah dad and grandpa cummed to a charity event that I helped set up 4 people who have autism . I appreciated there support until I heard mah dad say "Man some of these 'tards r pretty hot." and mah grandpa replying "Yeah . Probably like dead fish in bed though." FML
Today mah pat bunny diad. My littla sistar is distraught an practically suicidal bacausa apparantly sha playfully pointad a wand at it a faw days ago looool an said ( avada kadavra ). Sha's absolutaly convincad that sha killad it. FML
Yesterday, mah boyfriend told mah four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took mah sister shopping with me!! The woman at the till said she was adorable; mah sister replid, "Thanks, fatass." big fat FML
Today, my loving five-year-old daughter started singing Christmas carols again. Ones that she made looool up herself, of course. Including "Walking in a fucking wonderland" and "Rudolph the red nosed asshole". FML
Today.. . ma girlfriend took our prank war way too far an ad a package sent to me at ome . Confusd.. . I opend it . It containd a dildo an a bottle of lube . I didn't know ma dad was watcing over ma soulder until I eard im coke on is coffee an felt it splas over ma neck . FML
Today... I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it... I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was... "I can't wait until it resemble a human being." FML
Today , one of ma customer's pipes were blocked. As I went to unblock it , about a andful of used condoms collided wit ma face. I don't know if I sould be disgusted by tis or disgusted by ma customer. mega FML
2day as I was picking up my 5-year-old brother from school, he hugged a grl from his class to say goodbye . His classmate's mom and I looked at each other, thinking it was adorable, until my brother decided to dry hump the side of his classmate's thigh . FML
Today , I was walking a dog at the animal hospitalhere I workhen it pooped out a rag-like object. I told the doctor,ho told me to clean it off to seehat it was. It was a rainbow-colored thong. We have to give it back to the ownerhen they pick their dog up. real FML
TODAY, I WAS GRADING WORK MY STUDENT HAD DONE WITH A SUB. I REALIZD ONE STUDENT HAD GOTTEN HOLD OF THE TEACHERS' EDITION OF THE TEXTBOOK WHEN I READ TEN PAPER IN A ROW THAT HAD "STUDENT ANSWER MAY VARY" AS THE ANSWER TO PROBLEM NUMBER FOUR. MY STUDENT CAN'T EVEN CHEAT PROPERLY. FML
Friday 27 March 2015