mmcrae97

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mmcrae97

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  • Number of visits : 2871
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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mmcrae97's page activity

Visits<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 7:28am

Fucked!<b>patrickalamo</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 1:28pm

mmcrae97's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of mmcrae97's badges

mmcrae97's favorite FMLs

Today, while working at a children's toy store, a woman walked in, looked around a bit, then asked if we sell dildos. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2015 at 11:22am / United States / Work

Today, my husband decided he would rather be with his mistress than with me while I gave birth to our first child. FML

by MissyPants / 08/15/2015 at 4:22am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I had a first date with a guy I met online. And his mom. FML

by fridgemylifee / 08/13/2015 at 1:39pm / United States / Love

Today, I had to ride in the back seat of a car, next to a large, hyperactive dog who experiences nervous bowel movements. FML

by grace / 08/13/2015 at 10:54am / United States (New York) / Transportation

Today, I bought some pricey lipstick for a date tonight. An hour after putting it on, my lips are so swollen, I look like a blow-up sex doll. FML

by blow me / 08/07/2015 at 12:36pm / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, I fed my 4ft python a live rat for the first time. He now has a new friend he won't let me near. FML

by clutzirella / 08/07/2015 at 2:32am / United States (Florida) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out what mouse intestines squashed against my bare feet feels like. FML

by whydoihavecats / 08/04/2015 at 3:19pm / United Kingdom / Animals

Today, I met my wife's mistress, at the maternity ward in the hospital, after she gave birth to our second child. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2015 at 9:28pm / United States (Alaska) / Love

Today, on my second day at my new job, a customer called my manager with a complaint about me. He said I put the cheese "upside down" on his sandwich, and that made it taste bad. FML

by LexiD19 / 07/31/2015 at 6:56pm / United States (South Carolina) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was changing my clothes with my dog in the room. As I took off my shirt, he looked at me, ran into the corner, and threw up. Well that's a confidence booster. FML

by Anonymous / 07/31/2015 at 2:55pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, I found out why I was always picked up last from school. My parents didn't want the other parents to find out I was their kid. FML

by Lonely School Kid / 07/30/2015 at 6:35pm / Canada / Kids

Today, I just found my husband on Craigslist. He's working away from home, and he's looking to give a blowjob. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2015 at 3:29pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Intimacy

Today, I came home to find my mom drunk. She asked me for a hug and then started crying, "Where's my daughter?" I'm her daughter. And her only child, as far as I know. FML

by roselysunset / 07/29/2015 at 1:07pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while in a hotel, I left the room to get some ice. Since my parents left the door wedged open, I didn't worry about trying to find the room number. Without thinking, I walked in to another room that was also wedged open. Yes, there were people in it, and yes, they were both naked and hairy. FML

by Anonymous / 07/28/2015 at 2:55pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my step-sister told me that she was getting married to her girlfriend next summer. At a big family brunch, I made a toast to their marriage. I didn't know that my step-mom didn't know they were dating in the first place, or that she was severely homophobic. FML

by anon / 07/28/2015 at 1:02am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous