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miss_kay07's FML badges
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
miss_kay07's favorite FMLs
by LittleLou / 10/16/2016 at 12:28am / United States / Intimacy
Today, I turned on my furnace when I got home from work for the first time this season. Only problem? Cats. Our kitten Norman has never heard a furnace in his life and Noel has just forgotten what a furnace sounds like. Both cats are terrified and won't stop yelping. I just want to sleep. FML
by chrisinator / 10/11/2016 at 12:21am / United States (New York) / Animals
Today, I discovered that you should always check the litter box before vacuuming stray litter outside of it after my cat burst out from the box mid-piss and skittered around the house still pissing after I put the vacuum hose behind the box. FML
by mallyboo / 10/01/2016 at 10:38am / Canada (Ontario) / Animals
by Fffhjno / 09/28/2016 at 2:15pm / United States (Utah) / Kids
Today, my boyfriend and I wanted to kayak. On the way, I told him I had to go back to our hotel because I needed the bathroom and didn't want a public one to smell. Once back in the elevator at the hotel, it got stuck. For an hour. I pooped myself and had to wait 40 minutes after that for help. FML
by ItWasOurAnniversary / 09/28/2016 at 8:08am / Australia / Health
by christacat / 09/28/2016 at 6:24am / United States (Ohio) / Health
by broken / 09/22/2016 at 9:52pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by LoadingMeows / 09/22/2016 at 9:17pm / United States / Work
Today, I was fired without warning from my job because I was not consulting my boss about things like washing dishes and throwing away garbage. Basically, I was fired for being too good at my job. FML
by Worky Workerton / 09/22/2016 at 1:14pm / United States (California) / Work
by Battlebarney / 09/22/2016 at 6:58am / United States (District of Columbia) / Health
Today, at my job of 2 months, I'd taken it upon myself to water the plants around the office every day since they all looked a little sad. My boss then asked why so many of the fake plants were getting mouldy. My co-workers had watched me water plastic plants for 2 months and nobody bothered to tell me. FML
Today, I was having dinner at my aunt's house who just migrated to Germany from India and doesn't know any German. I asked for the recipe of a dish and she said that she has been buying these cans with cute kitty picture and just adds spices to it. Catfood is delicious I must admit. FML
by drchinky888 / 09/18/2016 at 1:10pm / Spain (Catalonia) / Miscellaneous
by Loose Ends / 09/14/2016 at 7:48pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, in science class, I was bored and playing with a paper towel, dipping it into a container of water. When my teacher caught me and asked what I was doing, I panicked and said I was 'drying the water'. FML
by slitherasssnape / 09/13/2016 at 2:53pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Work
Today, my colon got perforated during a routine colonoscopy. Apparently, it's a rare complication and I have no legal recourse. So now I'll need to use a colostomy bag for the next 6 months until I can get surgery to fix their mistake. FML
by Anonymous / 09/11/2016 at 1:52am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…