This member hasn't filled in their description.
miss_kay07's FML badges
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
miss_kay07's favorite FMLs
Today, I was fired without warning from my job because I was not consulting my boss about things like washing dishes and throwing away garbage. Basically, I was fired for being too good at my job. FML
by Worky Workerton / 09/22/2016 at 1:14pm / United States (California) / Work
by Battlebarney / 09/22/2016 at 6:58am / United States (District of Columbia) / Health
Today, at my job of 2 months, I'd taken it upon myself to water the plants around the office every day since they all looked a little sad. My boss then asked why so many of the fake plants were getting mouldy. My co-workers had watched me water plastic plants for 2 months and nobody bothered to tell me. FML
Today, in science class, I was bored and playing with a paper towel, dipping it into a container of water. When my teacher caught me and asked what I was doing, I panicked and said I was 'drying the water'. FML
by slitherasssnape / 09/13/2016 at 2:53pm / United Kingdom (Milton Keynes) / Work
Today, my colon got perforated during a routine colonoscopy. Apparently, it's a rare complication and I have no legal recourse. So now I'll need to use a colostomy bag for the next 6 months until I can get surgery to fix their mistake. FML
by Anonymous / 09/11/2016 at 1:52am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Health
Today, I was making a shake at work when the cup fell off the blender. I went to catch it, and instead caught the teeth of the still-spinning mixer. When my hand was still bleeding five minutes later, my supervisor told me to clock out until it stopped. I lost money for getting hurt on the job. FML
by TexasGirl24 / 09/10/2016 at 8:51am / United States (Texas) / Work
Today, my dog brought me his squeaky toy to throw for him. I went to throw it down the hallway but it hit the door and bounced about a foot in front of him. He just stared at me for a minute like I was dumb, then took it to my boyfriend to throw. I disappoint even my dog. FML
by nattnatt73 / 09/10/2016 at 3:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Animals
by full moon / 09/07/2016 at 10:37pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work
by ripped / 09/07/2016 at 10:57am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals
Today, my aunt said that it looked like I lost some weight. I was pleased with this, since I've been trying to lose some. My mom, for some reason, thought it was insulting. She pulled me to aside to assure me that I most definitely don't look any skinnier. FML
by eliinu / 09/01/2016 at 10:45pm / United States (Kentucky) / Health
Today, I was driving home when a guy crashes into me from behind. I get out of my car and tell him that I'm going to call the cops. He then asks me if we can move to a corner because we're blocking the way, so then get back in to move. I look in the mirror to see him driving off. FML
by Anonymous / 08/31/2016 at 11:40pm / United States (California) / Transportation
by Ihatepants / 08/31/2016 at 9:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous
by guh / 08/31/2016 at 11:54am / Malaysia (Selangor) / Intimacy
Today, I saw my new pet fish completely missing the food at the bottom of his tank and sucking up the little rocks instead. My last dog died from eating rocks. I think I'm doomed to have insanely stupid pets. FML
by StupidPets / 08/23/2016 at 11:09pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals