minimammoth

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Offline (the 11/21/2014 at 8:27am)

minimammoth

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 3 June 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1856
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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minimammoth's page activity

Visits<b>moo_mima_moo</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 11:42am<b>OhHeyItzNim</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 4:21pm<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 2:21am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 10/03/2014 at 1:01pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 8:58pm<b>Jessica0928</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 8:16am<b>eriicaaaf</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 11:13pm<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:54pm<b>thedeej</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 9:22pm<b>gabix3</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 8:49pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:45pm<b>lovelypink7</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:41pm<b>Landesanity</b> - the 09/28/2014 at 7:37pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 05/06/2014 at 1:04am<b>dk1991</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 4:57pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 10:00am<b>Sebastian2022</b> - the 02/16/2014 at 2:52am<b>casual_commenter</b> - the 02/13/2014 at 8:44pm

minimammoth's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of minimammoth's badges

minimammoth's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up with a raging hangover. I soon checked my phone, only to find that I'd drunkenly sent nude pictures to several friends' numbers, as well as to my own. I'd then replied to my own message, saying that I'm not gay and telling myself to fuck off. FML

by Anonymous / 10/18/2013 at 1:30pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I discovered my 10 month old is terrified of my laugh. Every time I start to laugh, she screams in terror. It's getting depressing. FML

by easily amused / 10/12/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Kids

Today, after sending in my passport application for a trip to Paris, I got a letter from the state department saying despite them having my original birth certificate, I don't exist. Upon calling them, I was told that it only proves I'm a citizen, not that I exist. I pay taxes and have a mortgage. FML

by Anonymous / 10/11/2013 at 7:45am / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the doctor's for an ultrasound, as I'm 7 months pregnant. Then he went home and took his wife out to dinner for her birthday. FML

by Cereal_mistress / 10/07/2013 at 2:54pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML

by animal lover... / 10/05/2013 at 6:34pm / Animals

Today, a customer was paying for his food. As he placed the money in my hand, he said, "Careful, those coins are sticky." I asked why. He replied, "You know, male stuff." FML

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

by anonymous / 07/17/2013 at 12:48am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my sister announced her pregnancy at my husband's funeral. FML

by thatsfine / 07/14/2013 at 6:52pm / United Kingdom (Surrey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that the weird guy that lives next door is my biological father. FML

by yayme. / 07/11/2013 at 6:26pm / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous

Today, my parents took my iPad back to the store and exchanged it for two cheap knock off tablets. Reason being my little brother threatened to run away because I had one and he didn't. I bought the iPad on my own after graduation. They kept the difference in price. FML

by evilmuffinlord / 06/18/2013 at 2:34am / United States (Texas) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend "finally figured out" that he couldn't possibly be the father of my child, and publicly broke up with me. When I reminded him that I was already pregnant when we first met, he "extra" broke up with me for making him look stupid. FML

by Anonymous / 05/30/2013 at 11:28pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to my 5-year-old son covering my nose and mouth with his hand and complaining, "Noooo, you need to die now." FML

by life insurance for 1 / 05/30/2013 at 12:29pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

by emasculated 10000% / 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Miscellaneous