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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 9 March 1996 (20 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 945
  • Number of comments : 64
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About migueljm5 : I am better than you.

Feel free to message me. I'm bored af

migueljm5's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 7:08pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 1:08pm<b>fringeisawesome</b> - the 08/04/2015 at 5:59pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:40pm<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 2:02pm<b>Raxy</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 5:59pm<b>RandomMishaps</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 5:55pm<b>cadyshaw17</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 12:06pm<b>Trevor_foy</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 12:55am<b>emily1015</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 6:25pm<b>freakyfriday101</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 7:47pm<b>tommytomq</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 1:24pm<b>DuckGirl420</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 4:51am<b>maria95aa</b> - the 07/30/2014 at 5:53pm<b>jaffvis</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 5:46am<b>captaininouille</b> - the 06/25/2014 at 5:14pm<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 10:12pm<b>Cherryta</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 5:42pm

Fucked!<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 02/09/2016 at 1:08am

migueljm5's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of migueljm5's badges

migueljm5's favorite FMLs

Today, a girl who has had a problem with me for as long as I can remember, tagged me in a Facebook status update in which she equated my intelligence to that of a mollusk and equated my weight to that of a hippopotamus. My boyfriend, as well as several of my "friends," liked it. FML

by smarter than a mollusk, skinner than a hippo / 11/10/2010 at 12:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was fired from the restaurant I work at because I missed my shift. I missed it because I was in the hospital for food poisoning from the meal I ate at work last night. FML

by anon / 07/26/2010 at 12:22am / United States / Work

Today, feeling down and dejected because of the shitty weather and none of my friends or family wanting to spend time with me to feel loved I took my favorite stuffed animal and that says 'I love you' when you squeeze it. I squeezed it. Nothing happened. Even an inanimate object rejected me. FML

by dejected / 02/27/2010 at 8:32pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I was out and was having a wonderful time. At exactly midnight, I get a call from my father. He's divorcing my mother. He's also going to Florida with his mistress for the weekend. If that wasn't the best news ever, he'd love if I found an apartment to live in ASAP. FML

by Anonymous / 10/17/2009 at 3:52am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, my crush was talking to me on Facebook. He said, "Did you know that 99% of the time a guy is talking to a girl it's because he wants to go out with her? Yeah, well, this is that 1%." FML

by Icy / 10/01/2009 at 2:59am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I wrote a note for my crush of 2 years, expressing all my feelings for him signed it as "Forever your lover" then I slipped it into his locker. Later that day, he walked back up to me, tossed the note at me and said "You know I recognize your handwriting, right?" FML

by fmynote / 08/27/2009 at 7:00pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I had the closing shift at work in a cafe and there was a man and lady left. I made them coffee and started to close up. When the lady finished her coffee she grabbed my arm and said 'I think that man is masturbating' and leaves in a hurry. I had to wait for him to finish before closing. FML

by MBG / 06/05/2009 at 3:43am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I was pulled over by a police officer for speeding. After writing the ticket, he asked me why I was wearing a surgical mask. I told him that swine flu was found in our area and I was scared. He thought that I was insulting him and wrote me another ticket. FML

by Anonymous / 04/27/2009 at 2:24am / United States (New York) / Health

Today, my airline lost my luggage when I flew back from France. They also lost my luggage when I flew to France. FML

by Dr. Jack / 02/04/2009 at 8:54am / United States (California) / Transportation