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mich23's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 04/27/2011 at 1:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I woke my husband up at 2am, screaming that there was a badger in our bedroom. We both screamed for a bit until he finally says, "What are we screaming about!?" I took a second look at the badger, and realized it was my four year old daughter with her blanket. FML
by BadgerSpirit / 04/27/2011 at 9:35am / United States (Washington) / Kids
by Anonymous / 04/27/2011 at 4:19am / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 04/26/2011 at 11:07pm / United States / Animals
Today, I stepped outdoors for a minute. The wind blew the door shut, locking me outside. I've spent the last two hours pounding frantically on the windows, trying to wake my 4 year old son who is inside. I can see him sleeping soundly on the couch. FML
by gottapee / 04/26/2011 at 7:11pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was out shopping. It was fine until my dental crossbow broke as I was laughing. The springs locked, and I couldn't close my mouth. The orthodontist couldn't see me for two hours, leaving me to walk around town with my mouth hanging open like a psychopath. FML
by rockyrocket / 04/26/2011 at 3:19pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Health
by alissa_roar / 04/18/2011 at 1:54pm / United States / Love
by Wendie / 04/18/2011 at 12:10pm / United States (California) / Animals
by fish killer / 03/25/2011 at 5:52pm / United States (Illinois) / Animals
Today, I was hanging out with the guy I like. All of a sudden, he pulls out a small vial of his blood to give to me, proving his undying love. Curious, I asked where he had gotten the blood. His answer? A razor blade. In his nose. FML
by radicaloser / 03/25/2011 at 4:50am / United States (Oregon) / Health
by Cxisbest / 03/23/2011 at 5:21pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by Cuzles / 03/23/2011 at 12:11pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I got a call from this drunk man, asking for Celeste. Since I don't know any Celestes, I told him that he had the wrong number. He kept calling for her. Apparently he can't take a hint that she didn't give him her real number, and I get to deal with him. FML
by jeanstein / 03/23/2011 at 10:58am / Miscellaneous