mhknorr

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mhknorr

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 27 September 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 317
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About mhknorr : live in vermont, once ate rat poison, that's why i'm so screwed up

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mhknorr's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He let me know by shaving "CYA" into my dog's fur and then moving out before I got home from work. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2012 at 2:26pm / United States (South Carolina) / Love

Today, I fought back with words against a bully. He cried, and I got detention. FML

by sharpie2792 / 02/15/2012 at 2:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked out onto the driveway to find my mom standing on the wet pavement, screaming at the worms that had come out after the rain, saying that they were "on private property" and that they were "trespassing." All of our neighbors had come out of their houses to watch. FML

by jess / 02/15/2012 at 12:47pm / United States (Montana) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend came over to my parents' house for dinner. My dad made Holocaust jokes the entire time. My boyfriend is Jewish. FML

by daughterofanazi / 02/08/2012 at 12:17am / United States (California) / Love

Today, I caught my boyfriend trying on my bra. He still has no excuse. FML

by Anonymous / 02/08/2012 at 12:04am / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad finally met my girlfriend. Unfortunately, he was driving the ambulance that she was in, due to severe alcohol poisoning and was on the way to the hospital to have her stomach pumped. FML

by screwed / 02/07/2012 at 8:40pm / United States (Connecticut) / Health

Today, I had to explain to this really intimidating girl that I wasn't giving her a dirty look, and that it was just my face at rest. FML

by Emily / 02/07/2012 at 3:39pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my girlfriend at the store and joyfully greeted her. She got really mad at me - it was her identical twin sister, who I still cannot tell apart from my girlfriend. We've been dating for three years. FML

by Anonymous / 02/07/2012 at 1:15pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I have to follow through with the bet I lost over the Super Bowl game. I don't have a problem running a lap nude around my block, but the cops in the police station right across from my house probably will. FML

by MillyMan / 02/07/2012 at 12:58pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was going to the bathroom, my engagement ring fell off into the toilet, which then automatically flushed. FML

by joy / 02/07/2012 at 12:49pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at my internship, I was told we were going to do something fun. I was excited, until I found out that this "fun" thing was labeling 500 folders. FML

by strongjon60 / 02/07/2012 at 10:07am / United States / Work

Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML

by DarkDolly / 02/04/2012 at 11:39am / France / Transportation

Today, I received a single, hand-made Valentine's card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML

by Jayde / 02/04/2012 at 12:12am / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I read some funny scribblings on a wall in the bathroom stall. My first instinct was to "Like" it. FML

by WayTooMuchFacebook / 02/04/2012 at 12:07am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, trying to pocket a little extra cash for himself, my dad responded to multiple babysitting ads on Craigslist, accepting them all on my behalf. I despise children with all my heart. FML

by Anonymous / 02/03/2012 at 5:49pm / United States / Kids