metallicshadow

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Offline (the 11/24/2014 at 3:54am)

metallicshadow

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 June 1992 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1845
  • Number of comments : 228
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About metallicshadow : hi i liek metallica and shadow the hedgehog thus the name metallicshadow

metallicshadow's page activity

Visits<b>kelserz27</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 6:57pm<b>Farklez</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 6:50pm<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:29pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 7:40am<b>xMrsCarlilex</b> - the 07/07/2014 at 12:16pm<b>awesomepantTamia</b> - the 06/29/2014 at 1:59pm<b>meandconner</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 6:57pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:35pm<b>Eivana</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 6:02pm<b>Alycat6363</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 8:55pm<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 08/02/2013 at 8:23pm<b>KiddoKS</b> - the 07/20/2013 at 8:42am<b>yellowchocobo</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 3:49am<b>da_directioner39</b> - the 01/01/2013 at 12:34am<b>Yousuck24</b> - the 12/20/2012 at 11:07am<b>winterforever97</b> - the 12/27/2011 at 12:14am<b>Rokara</b> - the 10/22/2011 at 8:53pm<b>THE_A_TEEN</b> - the 10/07/2011 at 12:56am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 1:40pm

metallicshadow's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of metallicshadow's badges

metallicshadow's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 08/03/2014 at 1:16am / Australia (Western Australia) / Work

Today, I was at the library, working with some classmates on our major semester project. I accidentally killed power to the row of computers by me. I've never had so many enraged faces looking at me before. FML

by AnonymousQuagga / 02/06/2014 at 10:07pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I ran into my apartment and let one rip, since I'd been holding it the whole elevator ride up. My parents had let themselves in while I was out, and laughed at me for a good 20 minutes. 5ML

by DJ / 01/24/2014 at 8:34pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, trying to get some much needed rest, I heard my neighbors fighting loudly. When they finally quit, they left a DVD on, directly behind my wall: Spongebob, with the menu tune on loop. FML

by tired individual / 01/12/2014 at 6:04am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was painting cabinets for the children's area in my church. While painting, I dropped my brush and got black paint on a white part. I tried to wipe it off. Now there's a very visible smudge that looks like a penis. FML

by peepeepainter / 01/06/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (Georgia) / Kids

Today, I downloaded a movie for my mom that she really likes, "When Harry Met Sally". When she loaded the file, we soon found out it was actually some kind of obscure porno billed as "When Harry Wet Sally". FML

by Anonymous / 01/05/2014 at 6:48pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I took an extra xanax to help with my anxiety, then went to sleep. I guess it was probably too much, because I woke up a few hours later, freaking out and panicking because I was convinced I was a bee trapped in a human body. FML

by beemove / 12/28/2013 at 4:19pm / United States (Washington) / Health

Today, a man started a deep conversation with me at the bus stop about life, death, and the miracles of things we take for granted every day. I was really enjoying it until he looked at his watch and said, "Oh shit, mushrooms make me lose track of time!" and ran off into the night. FML

by whatjusthappened / 12/20/2013 at 3:45am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try flavored condoms. I guess I enjoyed them a little too much; I almost choked half to death on a strawberry cockcicle. FML

by flavored / 11/18/2013 at 10:26am / United States / Intimacy

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

by fuck you, bitchcake / 11/10/2013 at 1:26pm / Canada (Nova Scotia) / Miscellaneous

Today, everything that was beautiful and pure in my life turned into a terrible, warped version of what it once was. Today, I lost all hope and no longer believe that life, although sometimes shitty, is sweet and worth living. Today, I met my mother-in-law. FML

by Anonymous / 11/07/2013 at 5:21pm / United Kingdom (Derry) / Miscellaneous

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

by NotGabe / 09/01/2013 at 10:25am / United States (Texas) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after giving me my very first orgasm, my boyfriend sat me down and had a serious chat with me about my orgasm face. Apparently it reminded him of the scene in the Exorcist with the possessed girl, and it really freaked him out. FML

by right / 08/02/2013 at 10:08am / United Kingdom (Dorset) / Intimacy

Today, after learning that my wife has been cheating on me, I decided to distract myself by playing The Sims. Not long after I began, my Sim's wife basically started cheating on him. FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2013 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Love

Today, after learning that my wife has been cheating on me, I decided to distract myself by playing The Sims. Not long after I began, my Sim's wife basically started cheating on him. FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2013 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Love