melbournearsenal

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Offline (the 04/10/2016 at 1:42pm)

melbournearsenal

65Fucked!

melbournearsenalmelbournearsenal
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 993
  • Number of comments : 70
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About melbournearsenal : Law student ~ 19 years old ~ Melbourne, Australia

melbournearsenal's page activity

Visits<b>ragnarok1540</b> - yesterday at 4:31pm<b>anonymous0110902</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:28am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 1:35am<b>aimeeowl</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 1:19pm<b>RayRay1107</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 10:17am<b>Kitteh8601</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 12:37pm<b>Blacktiger7221</b> - the 04/06/2016 at 11:39am<b>soccerforlife_27</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 2:26am<b>kawayi</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 12:50pm<b>Sansa_Kroma</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 5:26am<b>PDSot</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 1:04pm<b>madi10647</b> - the 03/18/2016 at 9:33am<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 3:19pm<b>agostina_mc</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 9:32pm<b>Mons</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 7:39pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 4:11pm<b>lulumars</b> - the 02/23/2016 at 11:44pm<b>anak36</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 11:16pm

Fucked!<b>anonymous0110902</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 3:28pm<b>RayRay1107</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 4:17pm<b>Kitteh8601</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 6:37pm<b>aimeeowl</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 12:24pm<b>PDSot</b> - the 03/25/2016 at 6:04pm<b>thefaekitten</b> - the 02/25/2016 at 10:11pm<b>lulumars</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 5:44am<b>awishadahbau5</b> - the 02/21/2016 at 7:33am<b>Sonata90</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 6:32am<b>sam882</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 3:56pm<b>paigexox0</b> - the 02/16/2016 at 12:49am<b>sojo0427</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 6:24pm<b>feven</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 5:03pm<b>atleast</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 3:52pm<b>aha_awkward_</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 12:49am<b>maria95aa</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 3:44pm<b>UberMom</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 8:48am<b>rhiley</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 8:24am

melbournearsenal's FML badges

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You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

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melbournearsenal's favorite FMLs

Today, at my job drug testing high schoolers, I see that one of the kids selected for the testing looked incredibly high. So, after he goes in the bathroom and gives me his cup with his urine inside, I take a closer look and see that the little shit jizzed in the cup. I hate my job. FML

by zachhewett / 02/02/2016 at 5:53pm / United States (Alabama) / Work

Today, at my daughter's fundraiser, I noticed that a guy with a face only a fist could love kept staring at her. I said "Beautiful, isn't she?" Before I could tell him to keep it in his damned pants, he replied "Hah. She's my girlfriend, dude. Total beast in the sack." Complete news to me on both counts. FML

by Anonymous / 01/27/2016 at 11:35am / United States (Kansas) / Kids

Today, some guy I don't know walked up to me and told me that he's determined to sleep with my girlfriend, then walked away while giving me the finger. I've never seen him before in my life. FML

by MystoganFT / 12/16/2015 at 9:55pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy

Today, my neighbor pointed to me and said to his best friend, "This motherfucker still lives with his mama. That's why he can't get no pussy." I'm thirty. My neighbor is eleven, and correct. FML

by Anonymous / 09/06/2015 at 4:11pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was at a club and caught a cute guy's eye from across the bar. He smiled at me, got up and came over, then said "Oh shit! You looked way hotter from back there. Damn!" and walked away. FML

by Anonymous / 11/22/2014 at 8:33pm / United States (Illinois) / Love

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

by anonymous / 10/27/2014 at 11:40pm / United States (Indiana) / Intimacy

Today, I got a call from my very drunk boyfriend at 1:30am asking for my permission to have sex with a "gross fat chick" he met at a pub, because he "felt sorry for her". The conversation ended with me getting hung up on because I "don't have a heart". FML

by pocketrocket90 / 08/08/2014 at 2:05am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy

Today, I found out the record label I was talking to was actually just my friends who have way too much time on their hands. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2014 at 1:24am / United States (California) / Work

Today, less than a week after ranting to my husband about how sick some people are to sexualize characters from kids' TV shows, I looked through his browser history and found out he's very much into Powerpuff Girls porn. FML

by Anonymous / 06/29/2014 at 12:18pm / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy

Today, my son got a beating. Apparently, he went to a club, waited until he saw a couple of girls pulling a duckface for a photo, then rushed over and threw pieces of bread at them. Their boyfriends, not too surprisingly, didn't appreciate this. I had to drive the idiot home from the hospital. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2014 at 5:15pm / Canada (Ontario) / Health

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

by Anonymous / 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, I decided to do a little shopping at Victoria's Secret. The woman at the register smiled and asked, "Got a special someone to impress?" I told her that my boyfriend of three years was in town for New Year's and we haven't seen each other in months. Then I went home to my four cats. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2014 at 12:14am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML

by Anonymous / 09/08/2013 at 12:38pm / Switzerland (Bern) / Work

Today, I took my cat to the vet. The creepy vet looked me in the eyes and said, "This isn't the only pussy I'll be checking out today." FML

by o_O / 06/23/2013 at 1:26pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, I witnessed an elderly lady getting mugged. I ran over to the guy mugging her and offered him the money in my wallet in return for him leaving her alone. The old lady snatched my money and ran away with the mugger. What the hell just happened? FML

by No money, mo' problems / 06/18/2013 at 6:01pm / United States / Money