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mclauren29

Offline (the 02/07/2016 at 12:14pm) | Search for a member

mclauren29

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 13 May 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2483
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About mclauren29 : Hi, I'm Lauren.
I like my daily dosage of FML. Though I dig the comments more than anything else.
I like the regulars commenters and FMLs that aren't about cats.

mclauren29's page activity

Visits<b>panromantic</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 9:42pm<b>Puddlepop</b> - the 09/22/2015 at 4:46am<b>PadfootLovesPie</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 1:07am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 7:50am<b>aidenmccarthy03</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 1:22am<b>Logan124</b> - the 07/12/2014 at 1:44pm<b>silmisstar</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 7:24pm<b>LilCheeno</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 4:40pm<b>scarman</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 2:03pm<b>mattb77</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:25am<b>enriquegonzolas</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 11:12am<b>emmmmmyyyyy</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 9:22am<b>shh_imbatmannnn</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 7:52am<b>rylaii</b> - the 06/22/2014 at 6:49am<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 11:31am<b>tuckit</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 8:06am<b>rabbi1010</b> - the 04/12/2014 at 5:53pm<b>name_loading</b> - the 04/02/2014 at 10:52pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 8:56pm

mclauren29's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

See all of mclauren29's badges

mclauren29's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me my vagina is "as clean as a dog's mouth." I'm not sure if that supposed to be a compliment or not. FML

#21450713
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25783) - you deserved it (3245)

On 08/02/2015 at 1:19am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while at work, I mustered up the courage to talk to a cute girl. I asked her name, to which I replied with mine and that it was nice to meet her. She followed up with a dirty look and the fact she hates anyone with my name. FML

Today, driving to work, I stop to let an old man cross the street. The driver behind me honks their horn, so I decide to drive slow to piss them off. A few turns later, I pull into the car park and notice the other driver following me. She works in the office next to mine. We met the other day. FML

#21450445
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21883) - you deserved it (6375)

On 08/01/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Hellasboy (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

#21450341
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25316) - you deserved it (6148)

On 08/01/2015 at 4:29am - animals - by funnnyyyyy -_- (woman) - Nepal

Today, I, along with two cops and another paramedic, had to fight to pin down some total scumsucker. He was high out of his mind on god knows what, in his underwear, screaming like a maniac outside someone else's house at 2 in the morning. I don't get paid nearly enough for this shit. FML

#21450305
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24038) - you deserved it (2684)

On 08/01/2015 at 2:18am - work - by hook me up with some smack, Jack (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I went to the restaurant where my date and I were supposed to meet. After half an hour he still hadn't arrived, so I texted him. He replied with a half-hearted apology and said he couldn't come because his cat had fallen asleep on his lap and he didn't want to wake it. FML

#21450259
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29365) - you deserved it (3001)

On 08/01/2015 at 12:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom demanded that I go into the basement and fix the water heater. I told her that I had no idea how to fix it, so she threw my phone down the stairs, told me to Google it, and locked the basement door behind me. It's been two hours. FML

#21371408
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34918) - you deserved it (3071)

On 03/09/2015 at 8:28pm - misc - by MyMomIsInsane - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my vibrator was in another room and I was too lazy to get it. I was also too lazy to do it manually. It's like I've been married to myself for too long. FML

Today, while showering, I pulled on my white exfoliating gloves ready to wash my face. As I was about to use them, a dark stain caught my eye so I sniffed the mark only to discover it was poo. After further investigation, I find out my younger sister had been wearing them and 'experimenting'. FML

#21104331
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45529) - you deserved it (4392)

On 04/04/2014 at 10:17am - kids - by AshleyP - United Kingdom

Today, my parents left early in the morning to run some errands, and I thought it would be nice to shovel our rather large driveway for them while they were out. An hour later, they returned from the store with a snow blower. FML

#21032937
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49963) - you deserved it (5490)

On 01/19/2014 at 3:35pm - misc - by fail (man) - United States

Today, while chatting to my mother, I tried to show her a funny website by pasting the URL into a message. After I sent the message, I realised that my browser hadn't copied the URL I wanted to send her, and that I'd actually pasted the previous URL I copied. It was porn. FML

#20957289
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22825) - you deserved it (45809)

On 11/14/2013 at 5:57am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my doctor told me that I suffer from orgasm migraines. Basically, I get an intense migraine that lasts for hours after I have an orgasm. FML

#20798770
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72874) - you deserved it (4427)

On 07/23/2013 at 1:17am - intimacy - by amanda (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, when my doctor told me I had symptoms of an STD, I had to repeatedly try to convince her I'm a 28-year-old virgin. Even as I left she still didn't believe me. FML

#20522701
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34658) - you deserved it (3680)

On 02/26/2013 at 3:21am - health - by Brook (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my boyfriend of three days met up with me at the movie theater, sporting a crude tattoo of my face on his cheek, along with a love heart and the word "forever." Looks like I'm single again. FML

#20469621
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38923) - you deserved it (4080)

On 01/20/2013 at 2:28pm - love - by maybe dead in a day (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I sent a cute, jokey text to my girlfriend saying, "Just in case the world ends, I love you." Not only did she dump me because I was an "idiot for believing in the doomsday", which I don't, she also wrote a Facebook status about it. Now everyone thinks I'm mentally unstable. FML

#20409563
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38746) - you deserved it (6846)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:37pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Vestfold)



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