maxtheripper666

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maxtheripper666

1Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 672
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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maxtheripper666's page activity

Visits<b>frankmz</b> - 7 hours ago<b>JD1147</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 11:33am<b>Mons</b> - the 08/15/2015 at 3:03pm<b>TheMeanwhile</b> - the 06/07/2015 at 2:47pm<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 2:10pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 7:36pm<b>morondon000</b> - the 01/08/2015 at 11:20am<b>ZombieSazza</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:46pm<b>Death_The_Kid15</b> - the 06/01/2014 at 10:49pm<b>eezila</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 11:49am<b>Riiley</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 6:56pm<b>olpally</b> - the 05/12/2014 at 12:32pm<b>Deadpool47</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 2:04pm<b>persianninja</b> - the 05/11/2014 at 2:01pm<b>bertyogurt</b> - the 03/08/2014 at 12:41am

Fucked!<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/02/2015 at 4:32am

maxtheripper666's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of maxtheripper666's badges

maxtheripper666's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML

by Anonymous / 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

by Anonymous / 04/20/2014 at 12:03am / United States (Idaho) / Animals

Today, my brother was arrested for starting a fistfight at a funeral. He didn't even know the deceased; he's just been crashing funerals recently, hoping to hook up with mourners. I'm not sure who's more pathetic: him for doing such a thing, or me for bailing his fucking dumb arse out of jail. FML

by an idiot / 02/16/2013 at 1:03pm / Australia / Money

Today, the attractive guy I barely speak to in my statistics class gave me a rose for Valentine's Day because he remembered they were my favorite. My husband got me a roll of quarters and told me to go buy myself "something pretty." FML

by RosesAreRed / 02/15/2013 at 1:07am / United States (Missouri) / Love

Today, I had to suffer through a two-hour long trivia game with my boyfriend's family. As if that wasn't annoying enough, my boyfriend caused the pair of us to lose by just a single point, because he answered "Quebec" to the question of "What is the capital city of France?" FML

by twohoursclosertodeath / 01/26/2013 at 5:57pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while sledding with my daughter, I tried getting her to go down a steeper slope than she's used to. She was worried she'd crash, so I went first to show her how it's done. I lost control halfway down the hill, bailed, and rolled into a tree. My wife has it on video. FML

Today, while going on a jog through the countryside, I discovered that it is actually possible outside of crappy TV shows to have a rifle leveled at you, and to be shouted at to, "Get off my land." FML

by fuckinghicks / 12/30/2012 at 6:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I were told by our elderly neighbors that they can hear us having sex a lot. To top it off, the elderly man said while patting his wife's arm with a smile, "Carol used to make noises like that too, back in the day." FML

by Ceej / 10/28/2012 at 12:06am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my crush and I were volunteering at a local farm. He confessed to me that I'm one of the most beautiful girls he's ever seen. Just as he leaned in to kiss me, I lost my footing and fell into a pile of horse shit. He just stood there, pointing and laughing. FML

by FarmerGirl / 10/09/2012 at 2:43pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, a guy I've been seeing for a while sent me a link to a porn site, with the message, "Holy fuck, isn't this your mom?!" Thinking he was joking around, I clicked the link just to see what sick shit he wanted to show me. It was my mom. FML

by identitychangeplease / 09/19/2012 at 4:41pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Intimacy

Today, I learned that I'm expecting twins. A boy and a girl. My husband, upon finding out about this, immediately suggested that we give them Star Wars names. But not Luke and Leia. Oh no. He wants to name them Darth and Vayda. And he is absolutely serious about this. FML

by AGeeksWife / 09/12/2012 at 3:03am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids

Today, I was cycling with my uncle and became increasingly frustrated as we got further and further from our intended destination. It took me a while to figure out that I had somehow lost my uncle and was following a complete stranger. FML

by Anonymous / 09/10/2012 at 6:40am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, the acne on one side of my face has flared up at the corners of my mouth, making me look just like The Joker. FML

by onorexveritas / 09/06/2012 at 12:54pm / United States (California) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after finishing a song during karaoke, a man came up to me and held out his hand. Quite flattered, I shook it, said thanks and that I was glad he enjoyed it. Turns out he was next and just wanted the microphone. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2012 at 4:52am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dog was run over. The man who ran over my dog was taking his own dog to the emergency vet. As the man awkwardly tried to apologise to me, he said, "Think of the irony". FML

by byegeorge / 08/17/2012 at 7:26am / United Kingdom (Hounslow) / Animals