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maximus_prime

Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 11:33am) | Search for a member

maximus_prime

43Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2107
  • Number of comments : 132
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About maximus_prime : Hey, I live in Brisbane, Australia. Love to read the stories and comments posted, lots of witty ppl contribute :-)

maximus_prime's page activity

Visits<b>deaddonkey</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 6:23pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 11:23pm<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 11:57pm<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 5:31am<b>jamaarlove</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 8:44pm<b>panromantic</b> - the 12/10/2015 at 11:18pm<b>valleus</b> - the 12/02/2015 at 4:34pm<b>Vintage_Cola</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 7:54pm<b>Arestian</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 1:59pm<b>dgv</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 8:28am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 11:49am<b>lemonadestand</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 1:11am<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 2:29am<b>samp_squad_23</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 5:12pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 8:57am<b>nospmis517</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 1:41am<b>ShleeG</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 7:08am<b>vaselineslug</b> - the 10/28/2015 at 1:54am

Fucked!<b>Hop6e</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 1:58pm<b>bwoolf96</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 4:20pm<b>melisssa87</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 4:52pm<b>ambert0322</b> - the 09/05/2015 at 5:14am<b>bobbybev95</b> - the 09/04/2015 at 9:08pm<b>Thatissarcastic</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 12:50am<b>chaseafterwind82</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 8:42am<b>interesting33</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 12:42pm<b>dying_to_know</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 10:01am<b>Smennant</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 7:37pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 9:35pm<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 7:38am<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 3:23pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 7:35am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:26pm<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 9:50am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 11:56pm<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 3:06am

maximus_prime's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of maximus_prime's badges

maximus_prime's favorite FMLs

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

#21236507
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40720) - you deserved it (3848)

On 08/13/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went for a romantic, anniversary meal with my wife. It was amazing, until we had to rush home halfway through because our daughter rang, informing us that her 20-year-old sister had broken her wrist trying to jump from the roof, onto the trampoline and into the pool. She 'miscalculated'. FML

#21230823
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43608) - you deserved it (3808)

On 08/06/2014 at 9:21am - kids - by We raised that fool (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I asked my 8-year-old daughter to kill a house spider for me. I am a 42-year-old man. FML

#21229943
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39516) - you deserved it (18186)

On 08/05/2014 at 8:31am - kids - by ihatespiders (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML

#21227320
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46048) - you deserved it (3914)

On 08/02/2014 at 1:35am - love - by bertiebeth - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that my wife of 12 years has slept with the workmen we've had working on our long term building project. They call her the "quickie queen". FML

#21226819
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60902) - you deserved it (4739)

On 08/01/2014 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML

#21211381
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39237) - you deserved it (19183)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm - misc - by happypineapple - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I collected a package from a handsome UPS guy. We exchanged smiles, and he even noticeably checked me out. I was feeling really confident for the first time in a while. Then I went inside and saw that I had two huge breastmilk spots on my chest. FML

Today, my school received the ranking for state tournaments. We're last. Our cheerleaders are too embarrassed to cheer for us. FML

Today, and for the third time this week, I found a pubic hair in my soup. I'm currently bed-ridden and can't afford to piss off my boyfriend by complaining. FML

#21054632
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42083) - you deserved it (5060)

On 02/08/2014 at 5:14pm - misc - by vey (woman) - China (Beijing)

Today, I was driving along when I noticed a kid struggling to push his car up the crest of a hill. I jumped out to help him, and he acted surprised to see me. Once we got the car over the hill, it rolled on down. I then saw that no one was actually in the driver's seat. I'd helped a vandal. FML

Today, my sister found out that Justin Bieber got arrested and now she won't stop crying. 5ML

#21037837
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46375) - you deserved it (5488)

On 01/24/2014 at 12:28am - misc - by Estee1024 - United States (California)

Today, my students unanimously agreed, in front of me, that the only reason they take my course is to look at my ass. FML

#21028396
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61894) - you deserved it (15088)

On 01/15/2014 at 12:54am - intimacy - by jseid2 - United States (California)

Today, a rumor was spread around that I was dating somebody. I confronted the person who everyone thought I was dating, and asked him about it. He also thought we were dating. FML

#20989946
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50875) - you deserved it (5906)

On 12/12/2013 at 6:27am - love - by Rumors - United States (Wisconsin)



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