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Offline (the 07/23/2015 at 12:12pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1592
  • Number of comments : 118
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About maximus_prime : Hey, I live in Brisbane, Australia. Love to read the stories and comments posted, lots of witty ppl contribute :-)

maximus_prime's page activity

Visits<b>KayDee29</b> - the 07/27/2015 at 2:50am<b>Umbraelux</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 6:03am<b>DragonHypeTrain</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 12:54am<b>_awwhellnaw_</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 3:11pm<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 07/16/2015 at 4:38am<b>leeleeamber</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 5:05pm<b>idontlikelife</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 1:39pm<b>dt1990</b> - the 07/15/2015 at 1:27pm<b>Smennant</b> - the 07/14/2015 at 2:36pm<b>angiemarie96</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:15am<b>AMcM</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 12:52pm<b>Replyka</b> - the 07/09/2015 at 8:52pm<b>bobjope</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 6:26pm<b>gigistar15</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 7:49pm<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 3:18pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 6:00am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 8:02pm<b>Dusty_Cups</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 5:19pm

Fucked!<b>Smennant</b> - the 07/05/2015 at 7:37pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 9:35pm<b>MrsPegg</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 7:38am<b>thebakingseal</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 3:23pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 05/27/2015 at 7:35am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 10:26pm<b>ohmissjane</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 9:50am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 11:56pm<b>insanecutie</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 4:05pm<b>sh4rpestl1ves</b> - the 04/17/2015 at 3:06am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 1:09am<b>AMcM</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 11:45pm<b>thatonelosergirl</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 12:12am<b>princessEll</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 4:54pm<b>Random_Princess</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 8:20am<b>CitricAcid</b> - the 02/24/2015 at 4:46am<b>EKDH</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 11:03pm<b>reiichan</b> - the 02/23/2015 at 10:32pm

maximus_prime's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

See all of maximus_prime's badges

maximus_prime's favorite FMLs

Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24967) - you deserved it (45173)

On 08/22/2014 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I woke up to a blood-curdling scream from the living room. I jumped up and went running, only to find out it was my mother, who'd screamed at some dramatic plot twist in a Sex and the City episode. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35952) - you deserved it (2929)

On 08/22/2014 at 4:26pm - misc - by leastitwasntsurpriseanal (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boss chewed me out for correcting several spelling and grammar mistakes in one of his reports. The words "Think you're so damn smart, don't ya?" were uttered. I'm his secretary, and proofreading his shit is part of my job. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42460) - you deserved it (2684)

On 08/22/2014 at 12:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, on my first day at as a photo editor at a print store, I had to spend over an hour editing a full shoot of a fat man eating a baguette in a bathtub, closeups included. FML


I agree, your life sucks (35728) - you deserved it (3439)

On 08/21/2014 at 1:39pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML


I agree, your life sucks (39444) - you deserved it (7296)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, my girlfriend took our prank war way too far and had a package sent to me at home. Confused, I opened it. It contained a dildo and a bottle of lube. I didn't know my dad was watching over my shoulder until I heard him choke on his coffee and felt it splash over my neck. FML


I agree, your life sucks (50675) - you deserved it (9214)

On 08/20/2014 at 5:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML


I agree, your life sucks (39758) - you deserved it (3771)

On 08/13/2014 at 7:33am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went for a romantic, anniversary meal with my wife. It was amazing, until we had to rush home halfway through because our daughter rang, informing us that her 20-year-old sister had broken her wrist trying to jump from the roof, onto the trampoline and into the pool. She 'miscalculated'. FML


I agree, your life sucks (42208) - you deserved it (3700)

On 08/06/2014 at 9:21am - kids - by We raised that fool (man) - United Kingdom (Derby)

Today, I asked my 8-year-old daughter to kill a house spider for me. I am a 42-year-old man. FML


I agree, your life sucks (38343) - you deserved it (17667)

On 08/05/2014 at 8:31am - kids - by ihatespiders (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted me to get him some take out. He responded with, "I think we should see other people. Uh, chicken please." FML


I agree, your life sucks (44937) - you deserved it (3830)

On 08/02/2014 at 1:35am - love - by bertiebeth - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that my wife of 12 years has slept with the workmen we've had working on our long term building project. They call her the "quickie queen". FML


I agree, your life sucks (54936) - you deserved it (3695)

On 08/01/2014 at 2:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I went to a market. I saw stall which had mainly animal furs and things like that. I found a rounded, furry pen and stroked my cheek with it. Wondering what it was, being so soft and oddly shaped, I checked the tag. It was kangaroo testicles. FML


I agree, your life sucks (36364) - you deserved it (17645)

On 07/16/2014 at 11:31pm - misc - by happypineapple - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I collected a package from a handsome UPS guy. We exchanged smiles, and he even noticeably checked me out. I was feeling really confident for the first time in a while. Then I went inside and saw that I had two huge breastmilk spots on my chest. FML

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