max367

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max367

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 11231
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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max367's page activity

Visits<b>ospreyman518</b> - the 09/13/2016 at 5:37pm<b>fader402</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 12:26am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 07/16/2016 at 7:47am<b>ImKimitheEmo</b> - the 07/11/2016 at 7:40pm<b>quazimozart</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 8:44am<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 1:54am<b>caggybandicoot</b> - the 04/08/2016 at 8:47am<b>oliversoden101</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 5:57pm<b>thatguynamedsky</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 1:01am<b>dmcintosh</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 3:21pm<b>TacoMan32</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 11:55pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 5:31am<b>Sleep_lover654</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 1:43pm<b>LivToFail</b> - the 01/31/2016 at 1:20pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 2:42am<b>nodeathtoall</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 3:30pm<b>kittykittyrun</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 9:05pm<b>idk0002</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 2:08pm

Fucked!<b>UndeadCity9</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 6:36pm<b>kittykittyrun</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 3:06am<b>KatPlaysMC</b> - the 06/14/2015 at 4:36am<b>Chaith</b> - the 06/11/2015 at 12:15am<b>clairedabear</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 5:00am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 5:08am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 12:57am

max367's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of max367's badges

max367's favorite FMLs

Today, my drill sergeant was yelling at me and asking me questions. I got a question wrong, and he asked me if I am a "Shit Sandwich". I replied "Yes sir, with extra cheese." I'm running miles till the day I die. FML

by BarhydtBran / 08/17/2015 at 9:55pm / United States (California) / Work

Today, my 4-year-old son's daycare called because he kissed a few girls. They explained he can't walk up and kiss little girls. I thought the situation was under control, until I was called an hour later to remove him from the premises for kissing little boys. FML

by stressedmom36 / 08/13/2015 at 7:50pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, in the second week of August, hell has come to earth; my mom has been playing Christmas music all afternoon and is already searching online for decorations. I hope she buys a length of rope to go with them, because I've already given up on life. FML

by brbkillingmyself / 08/08/2015 at 6:52pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to serve an incredibly rude and irrationally angry customer, but I managed to keep my cool. When he finally went to leave with his purchase, I wished him a good day. He whirled around and yelled "I'll have whatever the fuck kind of day I want, bitch!" FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2015 at 6:23pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend, when I noticed a large piece of broccoli wedged between her teeth. I have no idea how she didn't feel it, but I couldn't stop fixating on it and started going soft. I had to cry out, fake an orgasm, then toss the condom really quickly to spare her feelings. FML

by horsefuck / 08/07/2015 at 8:51am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Intimacy

Today, my step-sister told me that she was getting married to her girlfriend next summer. At a big family brunch, I made a toast to their marriage. I didn't know that my step-mom didn't know they were dating in the first place, or that she was severely homophobic. FML

by anon / 07/28/2015 at 1:02am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend's dad helped me put coolant in my car. When I said I wished I could do something in return, he told me to get an abortion so I wouldn't "ruin" his son's life. When I told my boyfriend, he didn't believe me. FML

by father-in-nope / 07/21/2015 at 11:17am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got fired, apparently for being racist to black people. When I told my boyfriend, he couldn't stop laughing. He's black. FML

by Razz / 07/15/2015 at 6:02pm / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife was in seemingly never-ending labor. It got so bad, I overheard a nurse in the doorway mutter to a coworker that she hoped my baby would just die or something, so she could finally go take a smoke break. FML

by Anonymous / 07/10/2015 at 9:23pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Kids

Today, I went by myself to do a birthday party in a park, dressed as Elsa from Frozen. Everything was going fine until another Elsa and an Anna showed up to a nearby party. The kids then decided I was a fake and pulled my wig off. FML

by princessrose / 07/09/2015 at 7:08pm / United States (Kansas) / Work

Today, after breaking up with my girlfriend of 3 years a few months ago, my boys convinced me to go out with the cute girl I had been talking to on Tinder. However, she wasn't cute, or a girl. He robbed me. FML

by Anonymous / 07/09/2015 at 3:46pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my idiot boss placed an expensive order for anti-bullying banners that read: "Take a stand against bullying!" This would be fine if I didn't work in a specialized school for children in wheelchairs. FML

by Anonymous / 07/05/2015 at 5:29am / United States (Oregon) / Work

Today, I quit my job so I wouldn't have to work with this one complete fuck-wit anymore. I told him what I thought of him, and then walked away giving him the middle finger. Turns out, he is a regular customer at my new job. Everyone loves him and thinks he's awesome. FML

by Anonymous / 07/02/2015 at 12:49am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, the man that I have a crush on finally touched me. This would have been great, if not for the fact that it was to roll me on my side while I was having a seizure. FML

by Anonymous / 06/30/2015 at 3:51am / United States (Minnesota) / Love

Today, another idiot was admitted to my hospital with a foreign object up his ass. Yet again, the excuse went along the lines of "I tripped and fell on it." Please, someone tell me how you can accidentally trip anus-first onto the end of a cucumber, which just so happens to have a condom on it. FML

by Idiot says "HIPAA violation" / 06/26/2015 at 9:21pm / United States (Virginia) / Work