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martin8337

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martin8337

107Fucked!

martin8337martin8337
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 4833
  • Number of comments : 1283
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About martin8337 : 53
Message me if you like.
Give a fuck, get a fuck.

martin8337's page activity

Visits<b>teresa96706</b> - 14 hours ago<b>herecomestheboom</b> - the 02/07/2016 at 2:25am<b>MissBoo111</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 10:32pm<b>mcbatmanrainbows</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 4:11pm<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 2:06pm<b>10220706</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 12:24am<b>kwerner7116</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 2:28pm<b>dyoy_87</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 8:32am<b>lmbachman</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 10:26pm<b>H3LL_K1D</b> - the 12/31/2015 at 7:16pm<b>Krictix</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 8:59am<b>corky1992</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 12:43am<b>NotADude</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 3:57pm<b>Mons</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 5:02pm<b>Sailer16</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 3:06pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:04am<b>sturschaedel</b> - the 12/11/2015 at 7:08pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 12/08/2015 at 1:56am

Fucked!<b>dyoy_87</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 4:28pm<b>lmbachman</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 7:25pm<b>poorjudgement</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 10:46pm<b>skyblueprincess</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 3:47am<b>luckypants</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 1:08am<b>shivakoushik</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 10:35am<b>feeloona</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 10:28pm<b>LPS8585</b> - the 09/12/2015 at 1:10am<b>kimise</b> - the 09/10/2015 at 11:07pm<b>kwerner7116</b> - the 09/09/2015 at 2:55am<b>lalala96</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 8:04am<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 5:50am<b>sweetgurl1985</b> - the 08/28/2015 at 10:46am<b>koganti</b> - the 08/26/2015 at 3:27pm<b>Rskittles10</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 10:18pm<b>MrsJellyBean</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 12:40am<b>Umbraelux</b> - the 07/21/2015 at 12:12pm<b>EvilTurtle</b> - the 07/20/2015 at 5:00am

martin8337's FML badges

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of martin8337's badges

martin8337's favorite FMLs

Today, I tried to get my golden retriever to stand in front of our church for a very short time to illustrate the point of a sermon. When I brought my dog up, he mounted the pastor's leg and began humping him. FML

#20873553
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39641) - you deserved it (9335)

On 09/08/2013 at 9:42pm - animals - by sillydoggy - United States

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML

#20872880
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53130) - you deserved it (3461)

On 09/08/2013 at 12:38pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Bern)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through my birthday card. FML

#20871364
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65248) - you deserved it (3846)

On 09/07/2013 at 12:08pm - love - by brycepetrillo - United States (Florida)

Today, after my grandma did some early Halloween costume shopping, I witnessed her modeling a "sexy nurse" outfit. After seeing her bare thighs and most of her ass, I don't think I can eat cottage cheese ever again. FML

#20868804
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50797) - you deserved it (4873)

On 09/05/2013 at 12:39pm - intimacy - by fuck my liBLARGHSLJNAdlajdSzxz (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I started my new internship at a vet clinic. By the end of the day I had: been peed on, scratched, forced to stuff a dead dog into a plastic bag, thrown up and almost passed out. I need to rethink my future career. FML

Today, I spent a large portion of the afternoon playing hide and seek with the door-to-door salesman who saw me sneak in the back door and won't stop knocking. No amount of hiding behind the couch will make him go away. FML

#20867080
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38842) - you deserved it (7108)

On 09/04/2013 at 1:25am - misc - by my back hurts - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my loneliness reached a new level when I befriended the fly in my apartment, Mr. Stickyfoot. FML

#20866691
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37989) - you deserved it (6810)

On 09/03/2013 at 9:32pm - misc - by JustAnotherFML23 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

#20866525
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24795) - you deserved it (39178)

On 09/03/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML

#20863540
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47524) - you deserved it (3457)

On 09/01/2013 at 7:06pm - misc - by WaltTheFuckDad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I witnessed my husband hocking a loogie into his hand, then throwing it into the trash can and continuing to make our sandwiches. FML

#20863339
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39632) - you deserved it (3097)

On 09/01/2013 at 4:04pm - misc - by no no no no no no no no no no no fuck no (woman) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my friends. At one point, I jokingly pointed out how one of them had the smallest boobs of us all. She calmly got out of the pond, dried herself, scooped up our clothes and phones, and drove off in her car. The cops she called arrived soon after. FML

#20861665
302 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24004) - you deserved it (69942)

On 08/31/2013 at 12:25pm - misc - by criminal tit offender - United States (Alabama)

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

#20861263
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46656) - you deserved it (7827)

On 08/31/2013 at 2:04am - misc - by fartz (woman) - United States

Today, my girlfriend freaked out, thinking she might be pregnant due to her period being late. I found myself reminding her that one actually has to have had sex recently to become pregnant. We've been living together, sexless, for over a year. FML

#20859311
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56820) - you deserved it (6333)

On 08/29/2013 at 2:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I actually had to explain to my husband why his habit of wiping his boogers off into our baby's hair has to stop. FML

#20859193
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46386) - you deserved it (3566)

On 08/29/2013 at 12:26pm - misc - by grossedout (woman) - United States (New York)



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