mariepastyglue

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Offline (the 01/27/2016 at 9:45am)

mariepastyglue

9Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 23 October 1985 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4200
  • Number of comments : 82
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About mariepastyglue : FML is so freaken addicting, and I love it!!!!

mariepastyglue's page activity

Visits<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 11:08am<b>IsathatSo</b> - the 07/13/2016 at 4:32pm<b>darkniss</b> - the 07/05/2016 at 11:25pm<b>jumbalia94</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 6:45am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 12:40am<b>TEZZ</b> - the 03/30/2016 at 12:59pm<b>Govcheeze</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 8:13pm<b>powerkeep</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 4:36pm<b>Jaadde</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 6:14am<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 3:28pm<b>igg125</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 1:04pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 1:52am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 8:06pm<b>johny93</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 7:30pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/26/2015 at 2:00pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 12/23/2015 at 7:29am<b>WOTAN1488</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 2:49pm<b>Mons</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 12:21pm

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 6:39am<b>crudeandrudeguy</b> - the 01/29/2016 at 9:28pm<b>Toonice45</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 7:52am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 2:06am<b>beeferjay</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 7:05am<b>Fredrico011</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 9:06pm<b>El_Mojiiito</b> - the 03/10/2015 at 7:40pm<b>apgreen69</b> - the 12/22/2014 at 11:51am

mariepastyglue's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

See all of mariepastyglue's badges

mariepastyglue's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting ready, when I heard my dad in the shower. He was singing along to the song "The Wheel in the Sky" by Journey. Except he'd changed the lyrics and was singing, "The dick on this guy needs a rubbin'." It turns out my mom was in the shower with him. FML

by Anonymous / 05/01/2013 at 12:13pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my husband laughed at me for farting in the bathtub; I lied by admitting to it. The fact is that I have enough back-fat to create suction against the bathtub. FML

by Anonymous / 04/24/2013 at 11:20am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my family and I were visiting an aunt. While helping my aunt to set the table, my sister remarked that from behind I look exactly like her. I reflexively blurted out "well fuck you too". Very awkward silence. FML

by Kjer / 03/23/2013 at 8:38pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Miscellaneous

Today, a technician from my ISP came to my house to replace my router. He asked for a glass of water, one thing led to another, and for some reason I'll never fully understand, we ended up having sex. Looks like porn logic is not so far off the mark after all. FML

by je_regrette_tout / 03/09/2013 at 1:50pm / Intimacy

Today, I was on a plane returning to University, and I decided to shut my eyes. I opened them about 45 minutes later just as the plane landed to find I couldn't move at all. I was in sleep paralysis. The air hostesses had to lift me out of my seat. FML

by Dave / 09/27/2012 at 11:46am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I was pulled over. The cop stated that he "couldn't see" me because I had "blended in with the dark car background", and that it looked like no one was driving. I was literally pulled over for being black. FML

by Anonymous / 09/12/2012 at 3:00am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I foolishly told my husband that I know he's been holding back sexually, and that I was willing to indulge any sexual fantasies he may have. Now it seems that tonight, I'll be responding to the name "Fluttershy". FML

by Anonymous / 06/25/2012 at 6:08pm / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Intimacy

Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML

by amidreaming?? / 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Love

Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML

by Anonymous / 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, a therapist told me that I was too depressed to attend his depression group meetings. FML

by Sad Sally / 04/24/2012 at 7:22am / United States / Health

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

by Anonymous / 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm / France / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm recovering from colon surgery. They gave me codeine as pain relief, which has made me constipated. I'm currently sat on the toilet, trying to push out what feels like a small child wrapped in barbed wire out without busting my stitches. FML

by screaming monkey / 04/04/2012 at 6:13am / United Kingdom (Windsor and Maidenhead) / Health

Today, I had to use antiperspirant deodorant under my breasts. FML

by Anonymous / 02/24/2012 at 10:05am / Ireland / Health

Today, I found out that my favorite song since I was a small child is actually about anal sex and delaying an orgasm. FML

by Anonymoosey / 02/19/2012 at 6:47pm / Canada / Intimacy

Today, I let my little sister sleep in my room because she had a nightmare. She is currently snoring like an overweight 40 year old man with a cold. FML

by sleepless / 02/18/2012 at 5:07am / United States / Miscellaneous