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marcranger's FML badges
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
I’m your new creative director
You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
marcranger's favorite FMLs
Today, at work, I needed to fart and thought it would be fast and silent, so I let it rip. I was wrong. Everyone turned around and looked at me as my fart rolled on for a good 10 seconds. The worst part, I screamed, "It wasn't me!" while I was still farting. FML
by Worthless Waste of Skin Who Hates Himself / 04/30/2016 at 8:59am / Georgia (Dushet'is Raioni) / Love
by JordanAfml / 09/03/2015 at 5:14pm / United States (Arizona) / Animals
by Sestricken / 08/11/2015 at 8:22am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love
by Myyrh / 06/15/2015 at 9:48pm / Switzerland (Basel-Stadt) / Love
Today, my dad gave my younger brother condoms and a pat on the back, even though he doesn't have a girlfriend. This is after called me a whore after he saw me kissing my long-term boyfriend last week. FML
Today, my dad was fixing my wardrobe and pushed too hard, causing stuff to fall from the top shelves. I saw it happen with my own eyes, but he's dead-set convinced that it was some kind of poltergeist fucking with him, and now he doesn't want me to go in my room. FML
by Anonymous / 01/16/2015 at 11:22am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
Today, after listening to a group of my friends ranting on about how much they love babies and can't wait to have them, I got to witness their looks of horror and disgust as I expressed my desire to not have children. I also happened to be the only girl there. FML
by Anonymous / 01/11/2015 at 8:14pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Kids
by unlucky / 12/11/2014 at 8:26am / Hong Kong / Work
by 19collegestudentandpregant / 09/26/2014 at 6:07pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous
Today, I attended a family gathering. My cousin's new baby was being passed around. By way of politely declining to hold it, I meant to say that I looked forward to getting to know it better once it could talk. What I blurted out instead was, "I can't wait until it resembles a human being." FML
by marcranger / 08/11/2014 at 7:40pm / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by lonely otaku / 12/25/2013 at 2:46am / Canada (British Columbia) / Love
Today, my boyfriend and I got into a huge argument while driving home from visiting family. We pulled into a gas station, and I went inside to grab a drink and cool down. When I came back out, both car and boyfriend were nowhere in sight. It was my car. FML
by marcranger / 12/05/2013 at 9:30pm / United States (Colorado) / Love
Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML
by Sherressa / 12/02/2013 at 3:04pm / Ireland (Dublin) / Miscellaneous
by fuck.jpg.bmp.gif.rar.zip.shit / 10/12/2013 at 4:28pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love
- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say…