Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Offline (8 hours ago) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 18 March 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3801
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About mansfield_j : Whoever appeals to the law against his fellow man is either a fool or a coward.
Whoever cannot take care of themselves without that law is both.
For a wounded man shall say to his assailant,
'If I live, I will kill you. If I die, You are forgiven.'
Such is the rule of honour.

mansfield_j's page activity

Visits<b>Mons</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 5:09pm<b>ellabellaboom</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 1:29am<b>MDoremis</b> - the 11/17/2015 at 12:02am<b>TrippingOnAcid</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 6:08pm<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 8:09pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 11/05/2015 at 10:30am<b>sa5v</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 9:15pm<b>bbackensto</b> - the 10/17/2015 at 12:01am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 11:17am<b>roryriddle</b> - the 10/08/2015 at 3:07pm<b>plan_Z</b> - the 10/07/2015 at 4:56pm<b>oldmanringo</b> - the 10/02/2015 at 8:19pm<b>RMfml33</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 5:02pm<b>makeupgirl</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 1:21pm<b>Saso</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 11:17pm<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 09/29/2015 at 8:07pm<b>Malteser95</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 9:38am<b>madalyn316</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 2:02am

Fucked!<b>ellabellaboom</b> - the 11/21/2015 at 7:29am<b>LadyLuck93</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 2:09am<b>missmorggan</b> - the 10/16/2015 at 5:17pm<b>madalyn316</b> - the 09/26/2015 at 8:02am<b>NotNeeded</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 10:37pm<b>derangedplanet</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 6:41am<b>ProximityToDeath</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 1:41am<b>apineapple</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 3:26pm<b>Mossyoak_kw</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 1:29am<b>SecretSociety7</b> - the 08/07/2015 at 7:09am<b>jessi_sunshine</b> - the 08/06/2015 at 9:13pm<b>fishingforubies2</b> - the 08/05/2015 at 3:20am<b>kendalbear</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 5:43am<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 4:51am<b>sam882</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 9:15pm<b>ashleyrose465</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 7:10am<b>krisseyDJ</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 9:41am<b>Miss_Mandi</b> - the 06/08/2015 at 7:47pm

mansfield_j's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

One more and it's business time

You've received 68 likes on your profile. Kinky.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of mansfield_j's badges

mansfield_j's favorite FMLs

Today, something must be wrong with me. Last night, my dick went limper than overcooked spaghetti while in my wife's mouth, yet today I popped a massive boner that you could hammer nails with, while cutting the grass. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22452) - you deserved it (2286)

On 11/24/2015 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by anonymous (man) - Switzerland (Zug)

Today, I had to call the doctor regarding my penis. Not because of erectile dysfunction or an erection lasting more than four hours, but because of the multiple fire ant bites I woke up to after falling asleep in my backyard. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22143) - you deserved it (3900)

On 08/28/2015 at 2:13am - health - by unsuckable (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boyfriend asked me to start using a period tracker app so I can tell him which week of each month he needs to "stay the hell away" from me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21980) - you deserved it (3692)

On 08/14/2015 at 9:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, I told my boyfriend of three years that I wanted to get married and have a child within the next five years. He responded by packing up my things and showing me the door. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24526) - you deserved it (5447)

On 07/26/2015 at 2:20pm - love - by rissa5214 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got hit on by an attractive young doctor. After talking for a while we realized that we recognized each other but couldn't figure out how. Then he remembered. He was the one who'd delivered my 10 1/2 lb baby 7 months ago. I stood out because my vag tore worse than anything he'd ever seen. FML

Today, I took the biggest, most excruciatingly painful crap of my life. It was so bad that I couldn't walk straight for a good 20 minutes afterwards. Long enough for my boyfriend to film me limping around and post the clip to Facebook with the caption "#anal ftw ;)". FML


I agree, your life sucks (31509) - you deserved it (3815)

On 03/22/2015 at 10:59am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was rock climbing. I had my equipment on and I saw a really cute girl. I went for the hardest climb in the gym, and while jumping up to grab the rock, I simultaneously farted, missed the rock, fell to the mat and broke my arm in the process. FML


I agree, your life sucks (34258) - you deserved it (16512)

On 11/20/2014 at 10:25pm - misc - by AOart1st (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had to go to my dentist about a chipped tooth. I got it after my hand slipped off my dick and slammed straight into my face while I was masturbating. FML


I agree, your life sucks (30996) - you deserved it (25922)

On 10/30/2014 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was leading a tour of my university and saw a girl in ripped jeans and combat boots smoking a cigarette. I told her that she shouldn't be representing the school in such a manner. She shot back: "I'm a Presidential Scholar. Suck my dick, bitch." FML


I agree, your life sucks (27663) - you deserved it (55648)

On 10/15/2014 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Alabama)

Today, a guy asked me out, and I felt butterflies in my stomach. I soon realized that it wasn't butterflies, but an unexpected bowel movement. I stood there awkwardly, looking him in the eyes, then farted hard. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44708) - you deserved it (4999)

On 09/17/2014 at 11:14pm - love - by HappilyNeverAfter - Canada (Ontario)

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47454) - you deserved it (10447) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 08/18/2014 at 12:48am - intimacy - by Degueusement (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I came home early, only to hear a mad scramble in the living room. I found my now ex-girlfriend and best friend in there, sweaty and in their underwear. The idiot actually had the balls to claim he was teaching her how to do push-ups. FML


I agree, your life sucks (59077) - you deserved it (4405)

On 07/16/2014 at 4:09pm - love - by betrayed (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my ex told me that she's 3 weeks pregnant with my child. Not only was she on her period when I broke up with her last week, her friend let me know that the positive pregnancy test she showed me was a fake that she'd bought online. FML


I agree, your life sucks (53313) - you deserved it (5250)

On 07/10/2014 at 1:52pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my dad interrupted my job interview with a phone call, just to say "I fucked your mom." No shit, dad. FML


I agree, your life sucks (47755) - you deserved it (7633)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my soon to be mother-in-law sent out the invitations she made for my wedding. On them, it says "You are invited to this 'special' event". In the same way, I'm referred to as "special", and my name is misspelled. Hint taken, you bitch. FML


I agree, your life sucks (49013) - you deserved it (4448)

On 06/28/2014 at 4:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Céline's illustrated FML
  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: