maigan332

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Offline (the 11/13/2014 at 2:41pm)

maigan332

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 19 March 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1531
  • Number of comments : 28
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About maigan332 : What do you want to know?

maigan332's page activity

Visits<b>IamAngryCoffee</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 4:20am<b>NotAUser</b> - the 09/29/2014 at 12:02pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 6:29pm<b>Mathis92987</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 4:11pm<b>stevib1223</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 1:15pm<b>Borngemini77</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 7:25am<b>acfreak69</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 11:06pm<b>DDCA</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 7:31am

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maigan332's favorite FMLs

Today, a few minutes after giving birth to our fourth child, my wife pulled me close and whispered, "I love you, but if you ever put me through that again I'll rip your balls off." Everyone laughed. FML

by you ripped them off ages ago / 08/17/2014 at 2:15am / United Kingdom (Derby) / Kids

Today, I was scrubbing the bloody aftermath of a successful mouse trap off of my stove with an old toothbrush. After a few good scrubs, out of habit I put the toothbrush in my mouth while I turned on the water. FML

by AylaMarie92 / 07/21/2014 at 5:04pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, as I was on the couch taking a nap, it started violently shaking. I panicked and chased my family outside, convinced it was an earthquake. It was just the cat trapped inside the couch. FML

by murrrrf / 07/21/2014 at 1:30am / United States (Missouri) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

by Lisa / 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Love

Today, I decided to bring down a very old fan from the attic. I plugged it in, and as soon as I turned it on, tiny spiders were blown all over my room. FML

by Anonymous / 07/11/2014 at 1:45pm / United States (California) / Animals

Today, a girl I recently slept with messaged me, explaining through a rendition of "Call Me Maybe" that she'd given me chlamydia. FML

by Rowansgonnarow / 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm / Health

Today, as always, my boyfriend has the ability to pop his eyeballs out of his eye sockets. He thought it'd be funny for me to wake up face-to-face with the disgusting sight. The shit in my bowels did an early Thanksgiving Day parade straight into my underwear. FML

by Anonymous / 11/10/2013 at 6:27pm / United States (Kentucky) / Miscellaneous

Today, my husband and I were arguing, but I dropped it so we could calm down before discussing the matter again. Later on, he made us lasagna. The moment I swallowed the first mouthful, he smirked, then started snickering uncontrollably. What the fuck did he do to my food? FML

by Anonymous / 11/02/2013 at 1:34pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, while working customer service, I instructed a customer to press the pound key on her cellphone. She hesitated a moment before asking, "Um, the pound key? You mean the hashtag, right?" FML

by #isthisthepoundkey? / 11/01/2013 at 12:49pm / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, my husband and I were watching Jurassic Park. At the end of the movie, he commented on how amazed he was that they could "train those dinosaurs" to do exactly what they wanted them to do. FML

by Anonymous / 10/29/2013 at 1:01pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Love

Today, the tickets I bought for my favorite band's concert arrived in the mail. The concert was last night. FML

by MsConfusedd / 10/27/2013 at 12:11am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I went on a blind date. The girl seemed perfect for me, until I found out she says "lol" and "rofl" out loud whenever she laughs. She also believes sex screws with people's "spiritual energy", and that's why she'll never have it. FML

by CUCKOO / 10/26/2013 at 5:27pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I found out that when my boyfriend jokingly talks about his other girlfriend, he isn't actually joking. FML

by other woman / 10/21/2013 at 12:42pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I discovered my 10 month old is terrified of my laugh. Every time I start to laugh, she screams in terror. It's getting depressing. FML

by easily amused / 10/12/2013 at 1:40am / United States / Kids

Today, I got my daughter's school pictures. Instead of smiling, she did the duck face. She's 6. FML

by Anonymous / 10/08/2013 at 5:16pm / United States (Illinois) / Kids