magaliwoodrock

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Offline (the 07/13/2016 at 5:45am)

magaliwoodrock

19Fucked!

magaliwoodrockmagaliwoodrock
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4367
  • Number of comments : 78
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About magaliwoodrock : My name is Maggie, I'm 21
I'm a college student
I've been a vegetarian for 10 years now,
and my favorite genre of music is progressive rock and edm

magaliwoodrock's page activity

Visits<b>Livin_Like_Larry</b> - the 07/15/2016 at 11:43pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/28/2016 at 4:53pm<b>hardesty2904</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 6:27pm<b>guskta</b> - the 06/17/2016 at 5:41am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 6:43pm<b>399</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 4:32pm<b>boostedc</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 4:00am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 05/23/2016 at 11:57pm<b>taby448</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 12:17pm<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 12:23pm<b>taylorcheri</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 4:54pm<b>finchy420</b> - the 03/26/2016 at 6:11am<b>devsfunda</b> - the 03/10/2016 at 12:54pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 8:58am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 5:52pm<b>Ethan_Anonymous</b> - the 02/28/2016 at 4:26am<b>Emmalyne606777</b> - the 02/24/2016 at 4:16am<b>fastman19</b> - the 02/22/2016 at 6:42am

Fucked!<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 12:41am<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 03/28/2016 at 4:25pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 3:00pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 7:23am<b>devsfunda</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 7:09pm<b>GuyOrange</b> - the 12/20/2015 at 6:39pm<b>chandler88</b> - the 12/18/2015 at 5:32am<b>christian1509</b> - the 12/07/2015 at 9:10am<b>S232Flash</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 2:19am<b>orios105</b> - the 12/06/2015 at 12:07am<b>andrewbezy</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 4:45pm<b>fastman19</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 3:14pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 2:24pm<b>Soldierman</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 9:38am<b>MoDDbest</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 7:58am<b>getoffmyscreen</b> - the 12/05/2015 at 6:35am<b>brandonwong</b> - the 11/06/2015 at 1:16am<b>A07</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 7:02pm

magaliwoodrock's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of magaliwoodrock's badges

magaliwoodrock's favorite FMLs

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

by Wtf / 07/10/2013 at 1:24am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 4:55pm / United States / Health

Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML

by Anonymous / 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm / United States / Holidays

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be funny to go to the Apple store and log me on to Facebook on every single computer. FML

by Terminator101101 / 05/30/2013 at 7:06pm / United States (Nevada) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the store to buy oranges and pick up a pack of condoms. When we were at the checkout counter, my boyfriend happily told the cashier, "The only way we can have sex is if we squeeze oranges all over our bodies." FML

by Anonymous / 04/10/2013 at 12:28am / United States / Intimacy

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, I finally managed to give her an orgasm. During that orgasm, she tore out a clump of my hair, causing me to scream in pain. She scowled and said, "Ah shut it, ya little bitch." FML

by dating walter white's gf apparently / 04/06/2013 at 3:13pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, my roommate stumbled in drunk at 5am with 3 Big Macs, and passed out on the floor after eating them. This happens almost every night. I stay in, study, work, and go to the gym almost everyday. And she still has better grades, a better body, and makes more money than me. FML

by apparentlythereisnokarma / 01/01/2013 at 4:00pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched "Rain Man" with my family. The whole time they kept exclaiming, "Omigod! That's just like Kate!" FML

by Kate / 04/29/2012 at 11:22am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I sent my grandma a naked picture instead of my girlfriend. While attempting to delete it, I sent it again. FML

by me / 11/04/2011 at 12:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend admitted that the only reason he remembers my eye color is because it's the same shade of his shit after he's had a salad. FML

by poopcoloredeyes / 10/31/2011 at 4:06pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, while on the phone with my boyfriend, I really needed to poop. Badly. He was in the middle of telling a story, so I figured I could get away with muting the phone while on the toilet. Halfway through, he suddenly went silent. I forgot to mute the phone. FML

by ShitHappens / 10/24/2011 at 1:04am / United States / Love

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

by Goaway / 08/14/2011 at 7:20am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to a party. I tried dancing in public for the first time ever. Judging by the whispers, stares and giggles, I'm never doing it again. FML

by Travolta / 08/14/2011 at 12:50am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, I came home to find my house destroyed. I was so devastated, I cried. I had spent days hand-crafting the house to perfection, down to the finest detail. On Minecraft. FML

by ifailsobadly / 08/13/2011 at 4:22pm / United Kingdom (Worcestershire) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

by lostforwords / 08/06/2011 at 3:10pm / Ireland (Tipperary) / Miscellaneous