Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5819
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 41 posted

About maemismile : I like batman, theatre, and cats. That's about it.

If your end game is nudes, don't bother.

maemismile's page activity

Visits<b>doubledutchy</b> - the 10/01/2015 at 8:53am<b>swharley</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 1:15pm<b>helptheorphans</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 11:52pm<b>sheeshadevil</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 7:55pm<b>19Hahaha11</b> - the 09/27/2015 at 12:54pm<b>Toodle_doo</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 2:50am<b>ratman775</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 4:37pm<b>eustonr</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 11:03am<b>Jake42100</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 6:56am<b>missmoschner</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 11:35pm<b>Eyalsh</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 7:35pm<b>AnimeAddict95</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 7:06pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 3:48pm<b>facelick</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 2:52pm<b>blakeced</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 12:55pm<b>poopsiepants</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 10:51am<b>expertsmilee</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 2:23am<b>paravoz</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 2:14am

Fucked!<b>helptheorphans</b> - the 09/28/2015 at 5:52am<b>eustonr</b> - the 09/24/2015 at 5:03pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 9:48pm<b>expertsmilee</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 8:25am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 09/23/2015 at 3:59am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 5:19pm<b>trey600rr</b> - the 07/25/2015 at 7:32pm<b>balboa_2</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 9:53pm<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 07/24/2015 at 9:38pm<b>Jake42100</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 11:47am<b>man_in_black08</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 6:26pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 07/07/2015 at 1:54am<b>keiNan</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 10:16pm<b>pratikp03</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 9:54pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 07/06/2015 at 9:30pm<b>Fredrico011</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 9:13pm<b>ranjithbvk</b> - the 06/15/2015 at 7:15pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 4:22pm

maemismile's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of maemismile's badges

maemismile's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend was shaving his beard in the bathroom when I left. An hour later, I found him exasperated after having shaved half his body. I had to help him shave every nook and cranny left because he said he was in too deep and couldn't turn back. Yes, his bumhole too. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21387) - you deserved it (2966)

On 10/03/2015 at 12:00am - misc - by NothowIimaginedmyday (woman) - United States

Today, I took my boyfriend to dinner to meet my parents. He agreed to be on his best behavior, but when my mom told us about some shady stuff going on at her job, he replied that it sounded "fishier than Justin Bieber's cunt." We were quickly kicked out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (19113) - you deserved it (3427)

On 10/02/2015 at 5:45pm - love - by FML (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to stand up on a train for my 4-hour journey. Why? Two pregnant women flew into unbridled rage with me over sitting in the priority seating, saying I was selfish. I'm recovering from spinal surgery. FML


I agree, your life sucks (27647) - you deserved it (1916)

On 09/29/2015 at 4:33am - health - by hunchbackofnotredamn (man) - United Kingdom (Warwickshire)

Today, my long-term girlfriend broke up with me because my hair "falls out" and I "will definitely be bald soon", even though it's not that bad. The same girl who I supported through her chemotherapy and gave her promises that I would stay with her no matter how she looked. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33016) - you deserved it (1681)

On 09/24/2015 at 7:52am - love - by lovedoesnotexist (man) - Belgium

Today, my boyfriend and I got in a fight about which is better: Star Wars or Lord of the Rings. We aren't speaking. FML

Today, my boyfriend cooked us a romantic dinner using the oven. The oven he recently hid $3,000 in for safekeeping. We essentially just spent thousands of dollars on a casserole. FML

Today, I was with my girlfriend at lunch when a group of guys came over. They started calling her a whore and a bunch of other shit, so I cussed them out. Turns out she was not only cheating on me, but all the other guys too. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26061) - you deserved it (1874)

On 09/21/2015 at 8:24pm - love - by Jgfenix - United States (Colorado)

Today, my boss told me to stop giving work to our college intern because it's an embarrassment to have someone who hasn't finished college working for him. This is the same boss who constantly brags about being a high school drop out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21948) - you deserved it (1387)

On 09/18/2015 at 4:02pm - work - by IkeTheIntern (man) - Canada

Today, I woke up to a cat licking my face. I don't have a cat. I quickly put the cat out the front door and went back to sleep. When I woke up later, I remembered that I had agreed to take care of my sister's cat for a week. I looked out the door, but the cat is nowhere to be found. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14626) - you deserved it (28070)

On 09/18/2015 at 8:22am - animals - by introublenow (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whiskey, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33559) - you deserved it (2143)

On 09/17/2015 at 3:48pm - kids - by Angus (man) - France

Today, it was my dad's retirement. He is traditional Japanese, so I had custom-ordered a samurai sword from a traditional Japanese blacksmith with dad's name engraved on the blade in kanji script. He loved it, right up til my drunk cousin tried to use it to cut down a tree and snapped it in two. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25681) - you deserved it (1409)

On 09/17/2015 at 7:13am - misc - by Ryoichi (man) - Germany

Today, I found out that after three years of telling my boss our strategy wasn't going to work, that I was right - it didn't work. I also found out that because it didn't work, I lost my job. My boss still has his. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22217) - you deserved it (1407)

On 09/17/2015 at 3:14am - work - by Unemployed (man) -

Today, I'm on vacation in Japan with my brother. When he said he could speak Japanese, I guess what he really meant that he's a dumbass weeaboo who only knows the words "kawaii", "baka", "sugoi" and a few others. He ended up offending two locals so much that they beat the shit out of us. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24883) - you deserved it (2920)

On 09/16/2015 at 1:16pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Japan

Today, my ex told me about how much the person she left me for loves the lingerie I bought her. FML


I agree, your life sucks (25362) - you deserved it (1999)

On 09/15/2015 at 7:47am - love - by Anon E. Mouse - United States (Maine)

Today, my teacher plugged the speakers into the wrong input on his computer, and said, "Oops, wrong hole", to which one of the students who often makes the same mistake said, "Story of my life". I understood it differently and started laughing. It would have been fine if the teacher wasn't her father. FML

G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • G.E. Gallas's illustrated FML
  • Hardcore will never die, but you will. We’re back with some rock n roll, or dare I say it, some punk rock. Don't run away, it's not that terrible stuff that emo kids listen to while slashing their…

Friday 2 October 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: