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Offline (the 12/23/2015 at 5:21am)



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5164
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About maddiiee00 : All you need to know is that I'm a female residing on the planet Earth. And I like skyrim a lot.

maddiiee00's page activity

Visits<b>toasty_narwals</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 9:12pm<b>Mooish</b> - the 11/04/2013 at 4:05pm<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 10/05/2013 at 6:28pm<b>RichardDickanus</b> - the 09/27/2013 at 1:17am<b>BTF989</b> - the 09/22/2013 at 4:05pm<b>Falzou</b> - the 09/15/2013 at 10:57am<b>thiswhitey</b> - the 08/31/2013 at 4:54pm<b>lekimdraw</b> - the 08/30/2013 at 9:52pm<b>InfernoVivo</b> - the 08/26/2013 at 6:32pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/19/2013 at 11:43pm<b>cristy91</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 11:30pm<b>olpally</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 11:46pm<b>Crash7777</b> - the 08/15/2013 at 11:34am<b>Bittenchaos</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 2:45pm<b>marykaitlyn</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 12:29am<b>SlapAndTickle</b> - the 08/11/2013 at 3:51am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 08/10/2013 at 5:33pm<b>altpokey</b> - the 08/09/2013 at 10:59pm

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maddiiee00's favorite FMLs

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

by JuggaloSlasher15 / 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, my husband and I were fooling around, and things got heated. In the heat of things, I told him to tear my panties off. He took it literally and yanked at them with all his might. It's been two hours and I still can't walk straight. FML

by fuck my arse / 08/08/2013 at 6:15pm / United Kingdom (Reading) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter, who was born in late 2000, mentioned how amazing it is that she'll be alive during the year 3000. I asked her exactly how old she thinks she'll be by then. She said, "Thirty, duh." I've screwed up as a parent, so very badly. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2013 at 11:19am / United States (Arkansas) / Kids

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

by Anonymous / 08/06/2013 at 2:19am / United States / Health

Today, my son told his 8-year-old sister that since she swallowed an apple seed, that a tree is going to grow in her stomach and kill her. She's inconsolable and won't believe that she'll be fine, because "they say that to all the dying people on TV". FML

by ulisha5 / 08/02/2013 at 5:54pm / Bulgaria (Burgas) / Kids

Today, at work, I felt a sudden, all-too-familiar pain in my stomach. I ran for the restroom, but before I could get there, I shat myself. I had to limp the rest of the way, then beg my boss to let me go home. He said no and told me to get back to work. FML

by Anonymous / 08/02/2013 at 5:34pm / United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne) / Health

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in the shower, oblivious to the outside world, when four police officers who had apparently been banging at my door, entered by force. They were doing a bust on a weed farm and got the wrong house. FML

by Anonymous / 07/30/2013 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, while taking my boyfriend's virginity, he started moaning, "Oh God! Oh God! Oh God!" He then started crying and praying. FML

by JustSomeGuy / 07/29/2013 at 11:43pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML

by PrettyScared / 07/29/2013 at 11:07am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was crying at my desk at work. My colleague tried to cheer me up by saying: "Don't worry, I'm sure you will find a new job soon". I didn't even know I was fired. I was crying because my cat died this morning. FML

by Anonymous / 07/28/2013 at 10:31am / Sweden (Dalarnas Lan) / Work

Today, my girlfriend and I attempted some bondage for the first time. Within seconds of the handcuffs being put on, I went into a serious panic attack. I was playing the dominant; my girlfriend was the one in cuffs. FML

by vanillaforme / 07/27/2013 at 7:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my sister backed out of my wedding because it was becoming too much about me. After I begged her to reconsider, I had no choice but to pick a new bridesmaid. When my new bridesmaid posted on Facebook how excited she was, my sister commented, "See, you made HER feel special." FML

by chumpslolo / 07/25/2013 at 6:55am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, the great deal on my new apartment has turned into a nightmare. I keep hearing extremely weird sounds almost every night, and when I tried taking pics of the place today, my camera's face recognition feature kept activating, but only in my bedroom. I'm scared shitless. FML

by notenoughunderwearintheworld / 07/21/2013 at 4:54pm / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Transportation

Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML

by Nick / 07/20/2013 at 3:37pm / United States (California) / Money