madamspammalot

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Offline (the 10/10/2014 at 5:01pm)

madamspammalot

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1515
  • Number of comments : 21
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About madamspammalot : If I'm online I probably should be working...

madamspammalot's page activity

Visits<b>wilwonks</b> - the 02/27/2014 at 11:49am<b>jixiekat</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 8:00pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 11/19/2013 at 10:18am<b>Unionbay47</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 7:37pm<b>mcm_3</b> - the 11/07/2013 at 4:11pm<b>Thursdayxo</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 5:53pm<b>supernaturalcat</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 8:49am<b>haylburg</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 3:25pm<b>hawkslax25</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 10:29am<b>Batgirl124</b> - the 07/26/2013 at 1:13am<b>Vanillanougat</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 8:48am<b>Disobey</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 8:02pm<b>semper_amo</b> - the 06/18/2013 at 4:39pm<b>I_Am_A_Rock</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 4:04pm<b>MrSarcasmic</b> - the 05/18/2013 at 7:12pm<b>dead_insects</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 9:06pm<b>martin_martian7</b> - the 05/13/2013 at 3:28am<b>thebestintheworl</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 3:26pm

madamspammalot's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

See all of madamspammalot's badges

madamspammalot's favorite FMLs

Today, I showed my mom a picture of a baby sloth. She then said, "Wait, sloths are real?" She thought Ice Age made them up. FML

by queenmeme / 10/08/2014 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, my dog found out how to turn my Xbox off. So whenever he wants attention, guess what he does. FML

by Z3R0G5 / 01/06/2014 at 6:00pm / United States (Indiana) / Animals

Today, I found out that someone had peed into the bottle of Febreze that we keep in the dorm bathroom. I found this out when I sprayed it onto my coat to get rid of a weird smell. FML

by Anonymous / 01/06/2014 at 2:13pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ate some amazing homemade brownies that my best friend's wife made for us. She waited till I'd shoved a third one into my mouth before she mentioned she made them with breast milk. Knowing her, I don't even doubt it was true. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2014 at 3:36pm / United Kingdom (Fife) / Miscellaneous

Today, I watched my father attempt to light a cigar with the stove and end up burning off some hair and eyebrows. He tried to play it cool, said, "Haircuts are too expensive these days anyway." and walked out, his head smoking. This man is a college professor. FML

Today, I had to basically ground my own husband, after he tricked our 6-year-old son into getting his tongue stuck to a frozen pole. FML

by Anonymous / 12/21/2013 at 2:13pm / Sweden / Kids

Today, it was safe to say I started sleepwalking again, after I woke up with a mouth filled with soil and a ravaged plant. FML

by adventurousnightsbutnotinagoodway / 12/17/2013 at 10:38am / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Health

Today, I caught a man standing on my porch, urinating on my house. I called the cops, who informed me that because my porch isn't fenced off, it's not trespassing, and because it's private property not visible from the street, the man wasn't urinating in public. FML

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

by confsused / 12/16/2013 at 12:49pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mother told her friends that I work as a call girl. I'm a call center agent. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2013 at 5:25pm / Luxembourg / Work

Today, I woke up in my hospital bed after having knee surgery, on the wrong knee. FML

by knee pain / 12/09/2013 at 2:17pm / United States / Health

Today, I had a dream that I was playing fetch with my dog. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't woken up to the sound of my phone smashing against the wall. FML

by jessierules93 / 12/07/2013 at 12:58am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my kittens hunted and killed their first prey. My hamster. FML

by Chatons / 12/05/2013 at 1:52am / Switzerland / Animals

Today, my neighbor brought a ruined napkin holder over and claimed that we drilled a hole through his wall and ruined it. I apologized, not telling him that it was actually a bullet that my boyfriend shot through the wall. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2013 at 12:53am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML

by OuchImAMoron / 11/28/2013 at 9:05pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous