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macy77875

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macy77875

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
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  • Number of visits : 545
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

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macy77875's page activity

Visits<b>DarthVerona</b> - the 01/09/2015 at 6:40am<b>brooklynrage</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 5:39pm

macy77875's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of macy77875's badges

macy77875's favorite FMLs

Today, I awoke at two in the morning to my cat putting his most recent kill on my chest. When I jumped up screaming, the dead mouse went flying and now my husband and I can't find it. Better yet now both my husband and my cat are giving me the silent treatment. FML

#21460304
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18538) - you deserved it (1873)

On 08/24/2015 at 11:16pm - animals - by catlady - United States (New York)

Today, I screamed like a little girl and scrambled to climb atop the toilet seat when I saw a cockroach running around our bathroom. My 5-year-old nephew came in, slapped it to death and said not to be scared, because he'll always protect me. FML

#21458825
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23201) - you deserved it (5962)

On 08/21/2015 at 11:25am - kids - by MyBallsForSaleOnEbay (man) - Malta

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

#21455960
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30686) - you deserved it (1365)

On 08/14/2015 at 11:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, I witnessed my dad wake himself from a nap with his own fart and start panicking in confusion. I guess I shouldn't have broken down laughing, because he demanded to know what I did to him. He didn't believe the truth and bitched me out for screwing around. FML

#21453366
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22012) - you deserved it (1906)

On 08/08/2015 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I fed my 4ft python a live rat for the first time. He now has a new friend he won't let me near. FML

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. It got hot and intense and we were really into it, until she blurted out, "Oh baby, rub your penis against mine". FML

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't like cuddling in bed because he hates rebreathing his own carbon dioxide. FML

#21451972
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21338) - you deserved it (2459)

On 08/04/2015 at 10:33pm - love - by Carowl (woman) -

Today, I met my wife's mistress, at the maternity ward in the hospital, after she gave birth to our second child. FML

#21451505
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22691) - you deserved it (1776)

On 08/03/2015 at 9:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Alaska)

Today, my boyfriend of 2 months and I had sex for the first time last night. This afternoon he texted me saying, "I had an amazing night with you yesterday." Following that text he said, "I forgot to tell you I have an STD." FML

#21451172
228 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32165) - you deserved it (5610)

On 08/03/2015 at 2:06am - intimacy - by ahhh - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to the restaurant where my date and I were supposed to meet. After half an hour he still hadn't arrived, so I texted him. He replied with a half-hearted apology and said he couldn't come because his cat had fallen asleep on his lap and he didn't want to wake it. FML

#21450259
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27818) - you deserved it (2625)

On 08/01/2015 at 12:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my friends showed me a video of me blind drunk last night, getting into a fight with my front door. The door won, unlike my face. FML

#21447461
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16610) - you deserved it (12180)

On 07/26/2015 at 10:27am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my boyfriend's idiotic friend shoved me into a stream so I could be "reunited" with my family, since my name is River. The first thing I saw as I climbed out, soaking wet, was my boyfriend high-fiving his friend. FML

#21443301
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25707) - you deserved it (2424)

On 07/18/2015 at 12:08am - misc - by River (woman) -

Today, at 3 in the morning, I was getting out of bed to use the bathroom, when my boyfriend grabbed my arm, looked at me wide-eyed and begged, "Don't... They'll take your skin..." He doesn't remember saying it, and now I'm scared shitless to use the bathroom at night. FML

#21439825
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27740) - you deserved it (2387)

On 07/10/2015 at 11:49pm - misc - by Julianapilikusplatosophophes (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, instead of canceling for the third consecutive time due to work-related reasons, my boyfriend sent his twin brother on our date. They both thought I wouldn't notice. FML

#21438625
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26932) - you deserved it (1864)

On 07/08/2015 at 4:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)



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