Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

lungjiao

Offline (6 hours ago) | Search for a member

lungjiao

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1032
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

lungjiao's page activity

Visits<b>baileythedancer</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 8:43pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 11:45am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 6:34am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 10:45pm<b>airborneranger7</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:26pm<b>DeadCDbooZ</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 4:23am<b>notabeachbabe</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 4:16pm<b>nancy4494</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 12:04pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 9:45pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 11:59pm

lungjiao's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of lungjiao's badges

lungjiao's favorite FMLs

Today, my nurse girlfriend told me she's more attracted to the veins in my arm than any other part of me. FML

#21397356
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26159) - you deserved it (3125)

On 04/21/2015 at 9:48am - love - by veiny - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I noticed that my boyfriend's sister looks at my ass more than my boyfriend does. FML

#21343548
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27495) - you deserved it (3026)

On 01/24/2015 at 4:40pm - love - by whitebitch16 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, a girl from class screamed at me in public for hugging the guy she likes. She threatened to take me out if I didn't "back off". That guy is my boyfriend. FML

#21333251
112 comments

Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML

#21321894
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33315) - you deserved it (6127)

On 12/22/2014 at 3:05am - love - by ScottyB - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML

#21320716
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31892) - you deserved it (4162)

On 12/20/2014 at 2:33am - love - by qyx3lmnop24 - United States (California)

Today, my mom found my dildo, and got so angry that she beat me with it. FML

#21309415
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48189) - you deserved it (13528)

On 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it's my mom's birthday. Got the perfect gift, the perfect card and of course the perfect cake. Well, it was the perfect cake until my dog's ass crushed it. FML

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML

#21276776
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36332) - you deserved it (5250)

On 10/13/2014 at 6:20am - intimacy - by Drafrica (woman) - South Africa

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48217) - you deserved it (3552)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML

#21258738
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39325) - you deserved it (2284)

On 09/15/2014 at 11:51am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my girlfriend texted me saying, "I have some Durex and want your help" so I rushed to her house. She had meant to say "Dulux". I had to help her paint her bedroom. FML

#21257403
95 comments

Today, I got rear-ended because my ultra-clingy girlfriend wouldn't let go of my hand long enough for me to shift gears. FML

#21220481
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43511) - you deserved it (10338)

On 07/25/2014 at 5:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, my boyfriend reckoned that he has a better sleep when he falls asleep with his hand on either my boobs or my ass. I kind of just laughed it off. I later discovered he's 100% correct when he put his hand on my butt, and not five minutes later was snoring. FML

#21217074
8 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40363) - you deserved it (6589)

On 07/22/2014 at 4:44am - love - by and the truth comes out (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my wife was putting her finger in my bellybutton and making overly sexual noises. I thought this was all fun and games until I realized she was actually into this. FML

#21209385
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51652) - you deserved it (6431)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:25pm - intimacy - by thedoc (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend informed me of how I had really hurt his feelings. Apparently, not wanting to be sent a photo of his poop is hurtful. FML

#21188342
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41241) - you deserved it (5543)

On 06/25/2014 at 7:38pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)



FML's blog

  • FML's Question Time #2: School
  • We tried this before and it went pretty well, so here's another blog section for everyone to have give their opinion on a popular but controversial subject. OK, we're not debating a…

Thursday 23 April 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: