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lungjiao

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lungjiao

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 1742
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lungjiao's page activity

Visits<b>crocks97</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 7:27am<b>luckygirl2522</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 8:18pm<b>Quendolin</b> - the 11/11/2015 at 1:56am<b>ladycoco8</b> - the 09/25/2015 at 1:21am<b>oliviagearshift</b> - the 05/22/2015 at 1:02am<b>baileythedancer</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 8:43pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 02/18/2015 at 11:45am<b>stuckintime</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 6:34am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 10:45pm<b>airborneranger7</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 10:26pm<b>DeadCDbooZ</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 4:23am<b>notabeachbabe</b> - the 05/29/2014 at 4:16pm<b>nancy4494</b> - the 05/07/2014 at 12:04pm<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 9:45pm<b>gary3768</b> - the 10/24/2013 at 11:59pm

lungjiao's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

See all of lungjiao's badges

lungjiao's favorite FMLs

Today, a long standing fantasy was ruined when the only lasting impression from my first threesome was of how good my boyfriend is at giving other guys a blowjob. FML

#21522994
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18482) - you deserved it (6493)

On 02/05/2016 at 4:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I tried to be sexy by pulling down my girlfriend's panties with my teeth. I didn't expect to be faced with the mother of all shit stains and start gagging so bad I nearly puked. FML

#21522398
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25062) - you deserved it (3605)

On 02/03/2016 at 10:40am - intimacy - by :x (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend wasn't kidding when she said that if I hit her cervix just the 'right' way during sex, she'd puke. I was on the bottom. FML

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

Today, I recently burned both my hands at work so I had to ask my husband for help changing my tampon, but he refused saying it would make him feel sick. This from the man who routinely sticks his tongue in my asshole when we have sex. FML

#21512451
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28396) - you deserved it (3303)

On 01/07/2016 at 7:00am - intimacy - by anne (woman) - Germany

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. He came. A lot. I doubt I'll remember it as anything other than, "The day I found out what sneezing semen feels like." FML

#21499606
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23432) - you deserved it (3460)

On 12/03/2015 at 7:52am - intimacy - by snortingspunk (woman) - South Africa

Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parent's bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML

#21497961
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20107) - you deserved it (26735)

On 11/28/2015 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by aj513 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend told me he took pictures of me while I was sleeping. Instead of it being all cute like you see on social media, there's me sleeping with his dirty-ass sock on my face and him smiling in the background. FML

#21494299
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21561) - you deserved it (2060)

On 11/19/2015 at 3:15am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, as always, I'm so flat-chested and childlike in appearance that my boyfriend successfully passed me off as his little sister to save money at a restaurant. FML

#21486772
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24933) - you deserved it (2119)

On 11/01/2015 at 3:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Harrow)

Today, my husband broke his toe after tripping over a dog toy. Instead of telling the doctors what happened, he said it was "sex related". I had to sit there, beet red with embarrassment, getting weird looks while he giggled to himself. FML

#21482952
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22317) - you deserved it (2296)

On 10/22/2015 at 10:47am - misc - by kinkyapparently (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend about the importance of foreplay, and that attempting to get me "in the mood" by whipping his cock out and air humping was roughly equivalent to throwing a dry teabag at me and claiming he made a cup of tea. FML

#21480731
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27434) - you deserved it (2726)

On 10/16/2015 at 11:05am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, I walked into the restroom at work to see my boss standing at the urinal, pissing like a toddler. He had his pants around his ankles, ass fully exposed. Now I'm never going to be able to take anything he says seriously. FML

#21480714
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22586) - you deserved it (1665)

On 10/16/2015 at 9:31am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I laughed about a fold in my girlfriend's jeans that felt like she had a tiny boner. She started crying. Turns out she has a slight deformity. Oops. Explains why we've been taking it so slow. FML

#21480670
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27939) - you deserved it (7399)

On 10/16/2015 at 4:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, my boyfriend told me that he doesn't know why I think deepthroating is so uncomfortable. To prove his point, he grabbed my dildo and effortlessly slid it down his throat. FML

#21479432
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31636) - you deserved it (5615)

On 10/13/2015 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, while I was in the bathroom my mom walked in and tried to have a conversation with me about my bowel movements. I'm 23, and this is a regular thing. FML

#21479282
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22684) - you deserved it (2735)

On 10/12/2015 at 9:53pm - misc - by ok cool - United States (North Carolina)



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