This member hasn't filled in their description.
lulubelles's FML badges
What'cha looking at?
You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
lulubelles's favorite FMLs
Today, my mom insisted on putting sunscreen on me. I closed my eyes and shut my mouth while she rubbed some on my face. Halfway through, I burped. I opened my mouth just in time to get a large glob of sunscreen in it. FML
by Unbearable / 06/25/2011 at 3:58pm / United States (New York) / Health
by James64138 / 06/15/2011 at 6:13am / United States / Intimacy
by forkmylife / 05/19/2011 at 6:57pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous
Today, on a first date, I finished eating my sushi, feeling proud to have managed chopsticks so elegantly and then rubbed my eye, oblivious to the fact I had just touched some wasabi. What followed was a classy exhibition on how to jump around screeching in pain. FML
by Jyocka / 04/26/2011 at 6:25pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
Today, I learned, 15 years later, that my puppy from when I was 4, was not taken by Santa because he was in need of a reindeer. My parents took him to the shelter because they thought he was ugly. FML
by leeseyxoxo / 03/27/2011 at 2:10am / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML
by Anonymous / 01/11/2011 at 1:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids
Today, after buying some groceries, I walked back to my car. After trying several times to get in the door, I finally look up and see a terrified little boy holding onto his teacup poodle for dear life, frantically waving me away. My car was two spots over. FML
by me / 12/18/2010 at 10:20pm / United States / Transportation
Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years, the father of my son, has been the pervert who has been harassing my mother with weird texts and pictures of his knob. The cops told me after we went to the police station to report it and catch the creep. FML
by grossed the f out / 12/13/2010 at 12:01am / Intimacy
Today, while I was out of the house, my 6 year old brother stole my new waterproof camera, dunked it into the toilet holding onto the wrist strap, and flushed repeatedly to see if it lived up to its "waterproof promise." It didn't. FML
by fmylife. / 11/29/2010 at 1:02pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous
by ihateumicheal / 08/02/2010 at 11:37am / United States / Love
by Lou / 06/01/2010 at 11:59am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Transportation
Today, my mom sent me beautiful candlesticks along with some half burned candles. I thanked her. She told me the candlesticks were a wedding gift to my grandmother 85 years ago. Then she said the candles were used at my grandma's wedding. I had already lit them. FML
by knews / 03/18/2010 at 12:46am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
by unloved / 01/18/2010 at 12:06am / United Kingdom (Southend-on-Sea) / Love
Today, I was sitting at lunch and started choking on a chip. I couldn't breathe and nobody tried to help me. Having to take matters into my own hands, I reached for a juice box that belonged to someone sitting next to me. After I could breathe again, they informed me that they had mono. FML
by ohmigodimchokin / 11/18/2009 at 7:19pm / United States (Texas) / Health
Today, I met a close friend of my husband for the first time. She told me it was amazing that I agreed to be in an open marriage and asked if sex was weird knowing he'd slept with other women. No, the sex wasn't weird, because we're not in an open marriage. FML
by Anonymous / 10/30/2009 at 5:19am / United States (New Hampshire) / Intimacy
- Today, I woke up for the third time in a row from a wet dream about my ex-girlfriend. I'm currently… Today, I found out that I take long enough showers for my boyfriend to sleep with my sister and put… Today, I put my sexiest lingerie on, lit candles, put some sensual music on, and got my bed ready…