lowj007

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Offline (the 05/25/2016 at 4:39am)

lowj007

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2762
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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lowj007's page activity

Visits<b>danm_1</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 1:53pm<b>foampositedaddy</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 4:15am<b>Tripartita</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 9:10am<b>Softballover1991</b> - the 09/19/2015 at 1:35am<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 12:09pm<b>giantsfan2010</b> - the 07/12/2015 at 10:27pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 10:31pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 10:52pm<b>Nsswimmer</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 7:34am<b>AllyCady14</b> - the 12/20/2013 at 10:19pm<b>haylburg</b> - the 09/07/2013 at 11:42am<b>jadeluv</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 4:41am<b>mikailanicole98</b> - the 08/03/2013 at 2:31am<b>Wizardo</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 4:45pm<b>punkyboy</b> - the 07/12/2013 at 10:10pm<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - the 07/11/2013 at 1:12pm<b>KiddoKS</b> - the 07/06/2013 at 11:29pm<b>MadMaddyson</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 1:51am

Fucked!<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/06/2015 at 6:09pm

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lowj007's favorite FMLs

Today, since I always fall asleep in class, I decided not to go to the bathroom beforehand, hoping the sensation to pee would keep me awake. I ended up falling asleep and wetting myself in the middle of the lecture. FML

by Pee.H.D / 05/02/2016 at 1:24pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife told me alcohol gives me "increased confidence without increased ability." FML

by j / 04/18/2016 at 6:24pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend is mad at me for causing him to fail a science test. Apparently he thought I was serious when I told him that homo sapiens were extinct because they were "homo". FML

by Anonymous / 03/07/2016 at 2:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML

by Anonymous / 01/23/2016 at 5:09am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was out with my brother and his group of very cute friends at a Cheesecake Factory. When the server came to take our orders, she asked me what kind of sauce I liked. Like a complete fuckwit, I blurted, "I like creamy white stuff." The guy across from me choked on his water. FML

by Bex98 / 01/11/2016 at 3:17am / United States (California) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I now accept how stupid I was to marry a man whose plans for the future all start with "When I win the lottery..." FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2016 at 12:38pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I found out that my best friend is being sacked. He's also about to rent a new apartment which he won't be able to afford when he loses his job. I can't warn him or I'll breach confidentiality and lose my job as well. FML

by Anonymous / 01/05/2016 at 10:04am / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Work

Today, I got a call from my dad asking if I was a porno actress. I am. FML

by Anonymous / 01/02/2016 at 5:31pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I accidentally farted at a board meeting. My boss thought it came from the guy sitting next to me and gave him hell for being a pig. I was too mortified to say anything, even when the guy blamed it on me, which caused my boss to rage at him for lying and then to kick him out. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2015 at 11:23am / Work

Today, the priest at my wedding farted. Everyone thought it was me. The guests, my bride, even the priest himself looked at me in disgust before continuing. FML

by Anonymous / 09/02/2015 at 9:33pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I spent an hour trying to sleep before work, but I couldn't because my two dogs wouldn't stop barking. Completely pissed off, I finally went and told the little fuck nuggets to shut the shit up. I was then immediately knocked unconscious by the burglar in my house. FML

by SilentSin / 08/24/2015 at 10:02pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend made me a coupon book. I thought it was sweet until I noticed they were all conditional. For example; "Give your boyfriend a blowjob and he'll give you a 10 minute back massage!". They're all like that and he's mad because I refuse to use them. FML

by shmoooopie / 05/28/2015 at 11:39pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my mother walked in on me watching porn. As punishment, she sat down and made me watch the rest of it with her as she gave play-by-play commentary. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2015 at 10:19pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

by Anonymous / 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I went with a couple of my friends to see a friend who's fallen very ill. Her dad walked in with a gun and demanded to know which of us had gotten his daughter pregnant. By the time I realized it was a joke, I'd already pissed myself. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2014 at 11:30am / United States (Vermont) / Miscellaneous