lovely_189

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lovely_189

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 18144
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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lovely_189's page activity

Visits<b>jill97</b> - the 03/01/2016 at 11:21pm<b>FEATHDUCK</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 6:30am<b>16bees</b> - the 07/10/2015 at 1:12am<b>retarded_whale</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 11:11am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 1:49pm<b>UC_jrmnts</b> - the 09/03/2014 at 5:31pm<b>Daylightscar</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:30pm<b>abdiG</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 10:34pm<b>megstiel</b> - the 05/14/2014 at 7:44pm<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/24/2014 at 4:05am<b>C_DOG37</b> - the 12/29/2013 at 9:24am<b>SininenAave</b> - the 12/16/2013 at 8:29pm<b>712sash</b> - the 12/11/2013 at 9:09am<b>burritosrgood</b> - the 09/21/2013 at 2:41am<b>katwohrls</b> - the 09/01/2013 at 11:45am<b>Potatopunch</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 11:59pm<b>sux4ubud</b> - the 05/20/2013 at 4:29pm<b>therealslim</b> - the 05/16/2013 at 10:51am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/28/2015 at 6:49pm

lovely_189's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

lovely_189's favorite FMLs

Today, at work, my stomach hurt and I passed gas for relief. Moments later, I discovered that my loose, silent "fart" was actually a wet, sneaky shart. The mess was beyond repair; I had to fake a family emergency and crept out of the office so that my coworkers wouldn't see my obvious crap stain. FML

by Few_Absolutes / 10/12/2009 at 2:10pm / United States (Maryland) / Health

Today, I was in a video chat with an old friend who I haven't talked to in years, and my mom walks in. The first thing she says is, "Did you close the toilet after you pooped? Cause today on the news I heard that your poop particles can fly up to 25 feet, landing on your toothbrush." FML

by Poop / 10/01/2009 at 9:09pm / United States (New Jersey) / Health

Today, I found out that if you don't clean the inside of your sonicare toothbrush, it can grow masses of fungus. I've been brushing my teeth with a vibrating mushroom for the past 5 months. FML

by mushroommouth / 10/01/2009 at 5:57pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally found out that someone had stolen my debit card and maxed it out. The good news? Whoever it was forgot to change the address on the card, so everything they bought online has been shipped to me. The bad news? I've received 16 snuggies so far, and I'm still counting. FML

by SnuggieOverload / 09/28/2009 at 4:36pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Money

Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML

by scaredtosleep / 09/24/2009 at 5:50am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the high school I have been doing at home for the past 3 years isn't accredited and doesn't count for anything. I'm 18 and starting high school as a freshman next year. FML

by diplomaless / 09/14/2009 at 2:58pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend of 5 years broke up with me. Why? Our one month old's hair is growing in blonde, and we both have dark hair. Did I cheat? No. I had blonde hair as a child until I was 4... As did every one else born in my family. I guess this factor doesn't count when you're paranoid. FML

by babymomma / 09/14/2009 at 10:13am / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my parents told me they wouldn't be able to afford my senior portraits. That was fine with me, until I found some expensive professional photos in the mail. Of our dog. FML

by sarahpft / 09/13/2009 at 12:44pm / United States (Indiana) / Animals

Today, my whole family was sitting in the kitchen. My sister was stoned and passed out in our dog's bed. My dad was drunk, yelling "who's your daddy" at his plate of barbecue, and my mom just sat there with that, "what the hell happened to my life" look on her face. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2009 at 5:27am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found one of those online color blindness tests where you have to distinguish a colored number from the pattern. Not being able to, I spent hundreds of dollars on medical tests to discover that the pattern online was a joke. FML

by colorblind / 07/05/2009 at 5:49pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend and I were in her moms car talking about which job was harder: actor or artist. I said, "Art is easy. You just scribble on a piece of paper and call it abstract art." Her mom squinted at me in the rearview mirror and my friend stopped talking. Then she said, "My mom is an artist." FML

by URGH / 06/28/2009 at 6:08pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to go get a new ID because my wallet was stolen, which had my social security card in it as well. I found out that to get your ID you have to have your social security card, and to get your social security card, you need your ID. FML

by angry / 06/28/2009 at 5:05pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went out to a nice restaurant for my friend's birthday. I went to the bathroom and heard the woman in the other stall crying. She couldn't pull her underwear up over her obese, old-lady ass because her arms don't reach that far anymore. I was the only one there. I had no choice. FML

by bathroomseww / 05/12/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I was taking a bath and needed shampoo. I leaned on the soap holder to get some and it came off the wall. Huge ants started pouring out running up the walls, down the walls, EVERYWHERE. I ran out of the bathroom screaming, completely naked. FML

by Karmas3itch / 05/12/2009 at 12:19am / United States (Ohio) / Animals

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML

by Litterbox / 04/19/2009 at 10:09pm / United States (Texas) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.