loserman67

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loserman67

8Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3238
  • Number of comments : 1066
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 62 posted

About loserman67 : Still tall and dark (the italian side of my make-up) and a little less on the almost handsome. Devil's Cut Bourbon by Jim Beam is my new found passion along with a good cuban cigar. Check out my new toy. Interested in talking? Let me know

loserman67's page activity

Visits<b>mr_suicidal</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 11:51pm<b>TEZZ</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 6:05am<b>Itineranthuman</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 10:21pm<b>WarMachine68</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 4:44pm<b>n_a_v_y</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 5:23am<b>mattzawesome</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 9:11am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 1:54pm<b>CharmedFML</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 5:50am<b>Steffi3</b> - the 03/31/2016 at 3:28pm<b>aliceaudrey1997</b> - the 02/10/2016 at 5:51am<b>Rich531</b> - the 02/08/2016 at 3:27am<b>sojo0427</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 11:22am<b>happysmile987</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 2:22am<b>shmoooopie</b> - the 01/08/2016 at 11:47pm<b>DAVIDtheDEMIGOD</b> - the 11/23/2015 at 2:56pm<b>missbeenz</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 11:22pm<b>skcmcpk</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 9:35am<b>konan__</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 12:13am

Fucked!<b>WarMachine68</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 10:44pm<b>millie14225</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 8:00am<b>coyotefox</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 1:10pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 4:38pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 3:42pm<b>ksks1234</b> - the 03/13/2015 at 7:48am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 3:59am<b>AHzulu</b> - the 11/29/2014 at 4:31am

loserman67's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of loserman67's badges

loserman67's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I was upset after a fight with my husband, so I cried alone in the bedroom. My 4-year-old son then comes in and hugs me. I thought he was trying to comfort me, but he then told me he had to go get his quarter my husband had promised to pay him if he made me shut up. FML

by Danielle / 08/22/2011 at 3:38am / United States (New York) / Kids

Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2011 at 4:18pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, my girlfriend came over to stay the night. Before she arrived, I popped a viagra to spice things up. She then informed me that she was on her period and didn't feel comfortable doing it. I had a headache and a massive boner all night. FML

by RohnAbheek / 08/21/2011 at 1:36pm / India (Maharashtra) / Intimacy

Today, my stepbrother found my diary and read it. He then told my boyfriend how I had a crush on another guy, and no longer liked him, causing my boyfriend to break up with me. That diary was from the third grade. FML

by Tinkerer / 08/21/2011 at 2:25am / United States (Oregon) / Love

Today, I finally lost my virginity. In my boyfriend's racecar bed. FML

by Emily / 08/21/2011 at 12:54am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, a stripper came into my work to get some posters copied. She asked if she could pay in small bills. I just touched $50 that have probably rubbed up against a stripper's twat. FML

by ChePow / 08/20/2011 at 2:26pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, my 4 year old asked to go outside and play in the sprinkler. I told him not right now because I was busy and he's too little to play outside by himself. I came out of the laundry room later to find he'd brought the sprinkler in the house and turned the water on. At least he listened. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 10:08am / United States / Kids

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 3:42am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I wanted to show my teenage daughter what we did when I was her age. We used to breakdance, so I stuck on a Grandmaster Flash track, and tried some old moves on the living room floor. I spun out of control, smacked my head into a wall and pulled a back muscle. FML

by Anonymous / 08/19/2011 at 3:13am / United States (New York) / Money

Today, I went to register for college classes with my mom. Upon leaving, my mom confessed to me that she thinks I will get pregnant and drop out before my freshman year is over. FML

by ms_nothing / 08/19/2011 at 12:03am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, after a tennis lesson, the coach was picking up the stray tennis balls around the court. Trying to be helpful, I asked him, "Do you want me to grab your ball bag?" His eyeballs almost burst out of their sockets. FML

by BigmouthStrikesAgain / 08/18/2011 at 8:18pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I noticed that a picture of me on my Mum and Dad's wall looked different. On closer inspection, I realised they'd recently painted over my teeth with white paint. I asked them why, and they said they looked 'discoloured'. It's my wedding photo. FML

by JLO / 08/18/2011 at 10:11am / Australia / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my parents discussing how to kill our cat, and how to make it look like an accident. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2011 at 9:38am / United Kingdom (Bexley) / Animals

Today, I was sitting in my cubicle at work, nursing a hangover, and thinking how stupid I was for getting so shit-faced last night. I then realized that I was voicing my thoughts out loud, and the whole office had gone quiet, listening to me castigate myself. FML

by Anonymous / 08/18/2011 at 3:42am / United States / Work