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lordslaya53

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lordslaya53

1Fucked!

lordslaya53
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 6 June 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3576
  • Number of comments : 43
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 10 posted

About lordslaya53 : Please ignore my username I made it when I was maybe 12 haha
Guitarist/ audio engineer/ producer based out of Calgary, AB, Canada
My band's name is Plaguebringer and you can check us out on Facebook and buy our debut EP on Bandcamp!

lordslaya53's page activity

Visits<b>MrsJoHood</b> - 4 hours ago<b>tralulilulalala</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 6:56am<b>spork_of_doom</b> - the 06/06/2015 at 1:52pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 10:13pm<b>swaglesshipster</b> - the 06/05/2015 at 6:56pm<b>shaar</b> - the 05/31/2015 at 6:41am<b>IniestaRox</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 6:27pm<b>ZoeeeGuyss</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 12:18am<b>James64138</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 4:40pm<b>sprigs_</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 1:46pm<b>jezzilla</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 5:21pm<b>maricruz486</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 3:50pm<b>brisbanegirl</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 9:21am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 10:29am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/26/2015 at 11:27pm<b>JoshNotWright</b> - the 03/19/2015 at 11:07pm<b>xninix</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 5:46pm<b>Agnesia</b> - the 02/16/2015 at 5:53pm

Fucked!<b>James64138</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 1:11pm

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You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.

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You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

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lordslaya53's favorite FMLs

Today, while sitting at a red light with my window down, the asshat next to me flicked his still-lit cigarette away. It landed in my car and wedged between me and my seat. It burned a hole in my shirt and my seat, and burned my back and hair. FML

#20665470
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45079) - you deserved it (3078)

On 05/15/2013 at 5:47pm - work - by Seriously? (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a coin on the ground. As I bent over to pick it up, some dude came up from behind, grabbed my waist and humped me three times. He ran away before I could get a good look at his face. FML

#20664572
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52066) - you deserved it (8992)

On 05/15/2013 at 4:08am - misc - by asdffhhjk (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I woke up to my friend stroking my face with the bottom of his foot and whispering, "Shh, you're okay." FML

#20661280
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40694) - you deserved it (4152)

On 05/13/2013 at 6:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my dad sat me down for the sex talk, except it wasn't really a talk, but rather him making me watch a hardcore porn video with him as he commented on what the actors were doing. I had to listen to all this and ignore his obvious erection for almost an hour. FML

#20660939
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (79868) - you deserved it (5510)

On 05/13/2013 at 3:10pm - intimacy - by more than I wanted to know (man) - Italy (Emilia-Romagna)

Today, my family flew out to surprise my grandma for her 70th birthday. When we arrived, she and my grandpa were both sitting on the couch, high, smoking a joint. FML

#20649343
19 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50357) - you deserved it (11362)

On 05/08/2013 at 2:59am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my ex won a writing competition. His story was inspired by our relationship. In it, I'm a serial killing prostitute. FML

#20647234
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49197) - you deserved it (7625)

On 05/07/2013 at 3:45am - love - by serialkillingex (man) - Netherlands

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

#20644821
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64960) - you deserved it (5973)

On 05/06/2013 at 2:29am - kids - by SkeetinKeaton (man) - United States

Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML

#20643910
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47787) - you deserved it (6361)

On 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm - kids - by me - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried channeling Mr. Miyagi by catching a fly with my bare hands. It turned out to be a wasp. FML

#20643732
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20233) - you deserved it (45961)

On 05/05/2013 at 7:30pm - misc - by FML136969 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

#20642182
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51343) - you deserved it (4447)

On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was out with my grandma when a pair of very shady guys approached us in the street, hands in their pockets. Without breaking stride, she pulled a knife out of her handbag and told them they'd better keep walking. They did. What the fuck, gran? FML

#20640901
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50393) - you deserved it (7096)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:05pm - misc - by emasculated 10000% (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, I walked into the living room to find my 11-year-old daughter about to kiss her "not my boyfriend" on the lips. When I asked what she thought she was doing, she peeled a piece of scotch tape off her lips and said, "It's okay! We're using protection." FML

#20640565
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70093) - you deserved it (10293)

On 05/04/2013 at 8:51am - kids - by wtfmama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my wife shaved her pubic hair so that it resembles Hitler's mustache. She won't stop referring to it as "the Clitler". FML

#20637691
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60692) - you deserved it (9167)

On 05/02/2013 at 8:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I walked in on my sister apparently trying to eat herself out. FML

#20637584
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72041) - you deserved it (8075)

On 05/02/2013 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by future brain bleach addict (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, for a laugh, I put vanilla yogurt into a mayonnaise jar and went to the mall to eat it with a spoon. Too bad that someone called mall security on me for disturbing the peace. They shoved me into a back room and grilled me about what was in the jar. FML

#20632537
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42676) - you deserved it (18653)

On 04/30/2013 at 11:09am - misc - by longsock123 - United States (California)



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