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lolmylifeisajoke

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lolmylifeisajoke
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  • Number of visits : 150
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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lolmylifeisajoke's favorite FMLs

Today, I was cuddling my new boyfriend, when he went in to kiss me for the first time. Sadly, I reflexively kneed him in the balls. FML

#20917814
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37817) - you deserved it (11577)

On 10/12/2013 at 4:28pm - love - by fuck.jpg.bmp.gif.rar.zip.shit (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I got my daughter's school pictures. Instead of smiling, she did the duck face. She's 6. FML

#20912722
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43114) - you deserved it (6979)

On 10/08/2013 at 5:16pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, at work, I was taking a woman's measurements while she held her screaming baby. To silence the infant, she whipped out her breast right there and started feeding him. Moments later, he puked breast milk all over my desk. FML

#20905964
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37411) - you deserved it (3101)

On 10/03/2013 at 1:39pm - work - by blargh - Russian Federation (Moscow City)

Today, my dad asked me to stop calling him "dad" because it’s too weird for his girlfriend’s kids to hear, because they call him dad. FML

#20901637
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48200) - you deserved it (2020)

On 09/30/2013 at 4:04am - kids - by meens42 - United States

Today, I found tiny little maggots in the bristles of my toothbrush. I have no idea how long they've been there. FML

Today, I was cutting a client's hair, and she was complaining about how itchy her head was from having it too long. As I lay down my comb and shears, three lice bugs ran across my counter. FML

Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML

#20894038
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47774) - you deserved it (2894)

On 09/24/2013 at 3:15am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, the Internet wasn't working. One girl decided to try to diagnose the problem. It said to connect the Ethernet cable. She started making fun of the computer for spelling "Internet" wrong. I'm graduating with this idiot in less than a month. FML

#20886445
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40171) - you deserved it (2692)

On 09/18/2013 at 10:57am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I met my birth mother. My dad won't talk to me, my mom won't stop crying and thinks I'm replacing her, and the rest of my family won't stop calling me a bitch. I'm 21, and I just wanted to meet the woman who pushed me head-first out of her vagina. FML

Today, I was at a coffee shop, when a middle-aged guy called me a "two-timing whore", dumped his coffee on me and walked out in tears. I'm 14 and I have no idea who he was. FML

#20878614
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54014) - you deserved it (3295)

On 09/12/2013 at 6:43pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while on vacation, I called my home phone to check the messages. Someone answered. FML

#20863583
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43187) - you deserved it (2239)

On 09/01/2013 at 7:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my daughter and I were driving home when our truck broke down. A police officer stopped and offered to let me and my two year old sit in his car for the A/C. When we got in, I sat her on my lap, and she pulled down my tank top and screamed "Boobies!" right in front of the officer. FML

#20862202
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40235) - you deserved it (3510)

On 08/31/2013 at 7:48pm - kids - by embarrassedmom - United States

Today, it was the day of my wedding. I had a massive headache a couple of hours before the ceremony so I decided to take a nap. I told my brother to wake me up an hour before it started. He forgot. Now everyone thinks I ran out on my wife. FML

#20856967
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42664) - you deserved it (6216)

On 08/27/2013 at 8:23pm - love - by dhskkf (man) - United States

Today, while working at a daycare, I had to change a kid's diaper. This may seem normal for a daycare worker, but not when it's a 7-year-old kid who is still not potty-trained and shat their pants. FML

#20846305
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41470) - you deserved it (2726)

On 08/20/2013 at 1:14pm - kids - by CrappyDay - United States

Today, I found out that my girlfriend hasn't really been "researching" for work on the Internet; she's actually been tweeting the same pathetic plea to a guy from One Direction asking him to "follow" her. She's 29. FML

#20808571
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37347) - you deserved it (3974)

On 07/28/2013 at 8:18pm - misc - by LeaveTheGuyAlone (man) - United States (New York)



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