lolfood

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Offline (the 07/22/2015 at 1:46am)

lolfood

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 31 January 1998 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 6620
  • Number of comments : 419
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 59 posted

About lolfood : Welcome to my profile.




















































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... Why are you still here?

lolfood's page activity

Visits<b>walker9879</b> - the 05/28/2016 at 1:57pm<b>TitanLegends</b> - the 04/09/2016 at 3:59pm<b>Brucinator</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 1:20am<b>HPCullen251</b> - the 02/19/2016 at 6:30pm<b>huehuea</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 12:44am<b>LuxTheSarcastic</b> - the 11/13/2015 at 10:01pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 11:09pm<b>FlightofAcidFox</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 1:14pm<b>paskievitchjack</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 8:30pm<b>cjl1028</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 10:07pm<b>EnJey0</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 3:50pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 12:43pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 5:31pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 06/03/2015 at 10:38pm<b>ionab101</b> - the 05/21/2015 at 7:50pm<b>raven83</b> - the 05/20/2015 at 9:35am<b>MaybeMoo</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 5:08pm<b>plastix</b> - the 04/11/2015 at 1:35pm

Fucked!<b>FlightofAcidFox</b> - the 10/31/2015 at 6:14pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 6:43pm<b>rachelthelime</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 11:31pm<b>HyunnK</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 11:57pm

lolfood's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

See all of lolfood's badges

lolfood's favorite FMLs

Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML

by UnluckyInk / 02/18/2013 at 3:50am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, just so my family would think someone might actually be interested in me, I bought myself roses and attached a secret admirer card to them. My plan would have worked if I hadn't forgotten to take the receipt off the kitchen counter. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 8:18am / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, while riding the train home, I noticed a man who kept looking at me. Annoyed, I told him to be less obvious and to stop staring. He promptly responded, "Bitch, I'm gay, and even I can tell no one would want to look at you." FML

by assoutofuandme / 02/14/2013 at 2:39am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I was walking with my friend. The girl in front of us had a really nice ass, so I turned to my friend and said, "Damn, she has a perfect ass." He replied, "That's a guy." FML

by notgay / 02/11/2013 at 9:30pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, while waiting for my order at a restaurant, a woman walked up to me and slapped me. She looked at me for a moment and said "Sorry, I thought you were someone else." Ten minutes later, the same woman came back and slapped me again. FML

by Target / 02/11/2013 at 8:42pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, a girl came up to me on the street and said, "You have like no swag, bro." Feeling clever, I said, "At least I have a high school education." She then took out her work ID, showing me that she was a surgeon, flipped me off, then walked away saying, "This is totally going on Facebook." FML

by Anonymous / 02/11/2013 at 10:26am / United States (Massachusetts) / Work

Today, I gave my 5-year-old daughter a unicorn pillow pet. She ended up giving him an ill-advised name, and has been loudly proclaiming to everyone she sees that her pillow pet is Horny. FML

by Anonymous / 02/09/2013 at 3:03pm / United States (California) / Kids

Today, I introduced my boyfriend to my overprotective father. My boyfriend started out with, "Sir, it is an honor to be your daughter's sexual partner." FML

by mydadsgonnakillme / 02/08/2013 at 2:13am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, after heavy rain my street flooded. While in my living room, I looked outside to see that my elderly neighbour was outside splashing in a knee deep puddle. He was butt-naked and wearing a snorkel and flippers. FML

by Stunned / 02/04/2013 at 4:15am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Miscellaneous

Today, after heavy rain my street flooded. While in my living room, I looked outside to see that my elderly neighbour was outside splashing in a knee deep puddle. He was butt-naked and wearing a snorkel and flippers. FML

by Stunned / 02/04/2013 at 4:15am / New Zealand (Wellington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was driving around with a few friends when one of them suggested we go in to an insurance company's office and sing their jingle. I'm an awful singer, so I was planning on lip syncing. Everyone else had the same idea. FML

by Anonymous / 01/31/2013 at 12:40am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I learned it's a bad idea to text and smoke while drunk, because there is an increased risk of throwing your phone off the balcony and sticking your cigarette into your pocket. FML

by anonymous / 01/30/2013 at 5:13am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out my ten year old brother and his best friend have taught our new parrot to say, "Shut up, bitch." We have a bunch of our extended family coming over tomorrow to see what the parrot can say. FML

by What? / 01/22/2013 at 2:00pm / Australia / Animals

Today, I was at a party with my crush. The collar on his shirt was sticking up so I fixed it for him. He gave me a hug and said, "Aww you're so good to me. You're like my mother. You can be my college mother." I got mother-zoned. FML

by shiney100893 / 01/14/2013 at 7:56am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love

Today, my daughter learned a new song. This would be great, except for the lisp her teacher has. I now have a child screaming about the "itchy bitchy spider" at the top of her lungs. FML

by ugh / 01/08/2013 at 8:01pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids