livkoko

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Offline (the 08/29/2014 at 8:23am)

livkoko

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 25 March 1994 (22 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2631
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About livkoko : "Simultaneously enchanted and repelled by the inexhaustible variety of life."

livkoko's page activity

Visits<b>XUnluckyAngelX</b> - the 06/13/2016 at 10:20pm<b>TheGoatTamer</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 12:31am<b>SorrowsReward</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 2:18am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 8:40am<b>Y0UI34574RD</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 1:14am<b>senor_octubre</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 10:58pm<b>colinabi</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 6:59pm<b>xandrea_mariex</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 3:00am<b>battlehamster</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 5:45am<b>robby9917</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 12:40pm<b>juliapereth</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 12:05pm<b>bobhays</b> - the 08/16/2014 at 2:46pm<b>silon5</b> - the 06/16/2014 at 8:08am<b>Haze64</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 12:03am<b>deviking</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 6:49pm<b>vinny098</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 3:56pm<b>Welshite</b> - the 01/25/2014 at 7:33pm<b>BrownBallSack</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 12:43am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 2:40pm

livkoko's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of livkoko's badges

livkoko's favorite FMLs

Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML

by anonymous / 01/12/2014 at 8:40pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, I played Call of Duty with my new flatmate. He continuously lost and was outraged that a girl beat him. It resulted in him shouting at me, claiming that since I'm Muslim, I must be part of the Taliban, which would explain my gaming skills. FML

by zahra_786 / 04/11/2013 at 5:11am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

by Anonymous / 04/09/2013 at 2:01pm / United States / Health

Today, whilst texting my boyfriend on the train, I noticed the woman sitting next to me staring intently at my phone. After letting my boyfriend know, he sent a message saying, "Are we gonna involve the dog again? Last night was fun." She gasped and screamed that I'm a "twisted dog-humping bitch." FML

by Anonymous / 03/25/2013 at 8:28pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Animals

Today, I was feeling sick and fainted while teaching my kindergarten class. I came to when one boy poured a cup of water on my face. Three kids were crying into my walkie talkie telling the office I was dead, and the rest of the class had disappeared. FML

by kindergarten teacher / 03/23/2013 at 9:25am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, after about fifteen minutes of my cat bullying me into letting him get onto my lap, I finally caved. He clambered on, turned around, farted in my direction and got off as fast as he got on. FML

by orely44 / 03/08/2013 at 9:13am / France (Pays de la Loire) / Animals

Today, while working, I thought, "I wish my kittens could text so I can talk to them throughout the day." And then I realized, I'm that cat lady you read about. FML

by Anonymous / 03/05/2013 at 11:13am / United States (Vermont) / Animals

Today, a classmate posted a recording of a recent lecture on my university's Facebook page, so we could listen again and take notes at home. A few minutes in, I heard myself asking a question. I then heard snorting and some girl muttering "dumb cunt" under her breath. FML

by DumbCuntApparently / 02/27/2013 at 3:52pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Miscellaneous

Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML

by Anonymous / 02/25/2013 at 12:57pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I found out my mother has enough toys to open a sex shop. FML

by Lois / 02/09/2013 at 7:00am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Intimacy

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

by Brock / 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, during my first day as a medical intern in a new ward, I was performing a rectal exam. My supervisor thought it would be funny to burst into the room and scream, "Who are you?! You don't even work here, you pervert!" FML

by dr mamour / 01/30/2013 at 4:57pm / Love

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me he wanted to learn Korean before Spanish. Apparently, being able to sing along to Gangnam Style is more important to him than being able to speak with my family. FML

by Latina / 01/11/2013 at 5:24am / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML

by _The__Doctor_ / 12/31/2012 at 5:44pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I were having Christmas dinner while his mom was away. I was lying alone on his bed while he did the dishes, when the bedroom door dramatically swung open and his mom glared at me from the doorway. I had to leave when she screamed "FORNICATION IS A SIN!" FML

by un_christmas / 12/25/2012 at 1:41am / Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur) / Love