About littlem91 : I'm somewhere in England. It rains a lot.
littlem91's FML badges
Picture this FML
You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.
Between your Facebook account and your FML account, things are no longer complicated: their relationship is official. We like this.
The Thumb strikes back
You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
littlem91's favorite FMLs
Today, I had a nightmare in which I was haunted by the ghost of my foreskin. I then spent the whole day moping around, wondering what my life would've been like if my parents hadn't opted to slice it off. Will I see you in heaven, long-lost ghostly foreskin? FML
by MissYouPieceOfSkin / 11/27/2013 at 3:44am / United States (Washington) / Health
by lauren_crewd / 11/23/2013 at 6:56pm / United States (Alabama) / Health
Today, I realized that no matter what I accomplish in life, I'll always be remembered for being the son of a woman so stupid that she claimed she used to be Elvis Presley's mistress. She was still an infant when he died. FML
by fs / 11/23/2013 at 6:45pm / United States (Minnesota) / Miscellaneous
by InsertPopcicle / 11/22/2013 at 1:53am / United States / Miscellaneous
by kittyboo_is_me / 11/19/2013 at 1:59am / Slovenia (Maribor) / Animals
Today, after being forced to take my little sister trick-or-treating, we had the cops called on us twice. She thought it would be funny to tell all the people giving out candy that I'd been following her around and that she had no idea who I was, and that she was scared of me. FML
by PumaPounce / 11/02/2013 at 12:50am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids
Today, my grandma has been running around the neighborhood, dressed as Bobo the Evil Clown, chasing trick-or-treaters. All I've been able to do is chase after her, and apologize to the terrified children's families. FML
by bobosgonnagetyou / 11/01/2013 at 2:04am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 10/24/2013 at 3:16pm / United States (New Mexico) / Health
Today, I started doing it again. I'd given up for years, but when I saw the pack I just couldn't help myself. One taste was enough to make me finish off the whole pack. Nobody knows that I've fallen off the wagon and I'm so ashamed of myself. Today, I began eating my cat's biscuits again. FML
by Aliiiice / 07/16/2013 at 9:18am / France (Haute-Normandie) / Health
by BlueB / 07/06/2013 at 11:42am / United States / Miscellaneous
by StockedWithJuice / 07/06/2013 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML
by Anonymous / 07/06/2013 at 7:26am / United States / Love
by skunked / 06/18/2013 at 2:00pm / United States (California) / Animals
by notyourmom / 06/11/2013 at 8:00am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 06/06/2013 at 12:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…
- Today, I had my wisdom teeth removed. The sympathetic words from my boyfriend asked if this meant I… Today, while reading an erotic story I was more excited that the author used a conjunctive adverb… Today, my boyfriend decided that vaginal, oral, and anal sex are starting to get boring. Let's just…