About littlem91 : I'm somewhere in England. It rains a lot.
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littlem91's favorite FMLs
by Rowansgonnarow / 07/05/2014 at 4:19pm / Health
by zl5 / 07/04/2014 at 7:17pm / New Zealand (Wellington) / Work
by stopinthenameoflove / 06/19/2014 at 10:37am / Ireland (Dublin) / Love
Today, some alarm, somewhere in my house, is making a low battery noise. I've checked every smoke detector multiple times, and I can't find it. It has been hours. I'm not sure if its still doing it or if the sound has just invaded my brain. FML
by AndrewKeane / 06/09/2014 at 12:26pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous
Today, my husband thought it would be hilarious to slip a little fake blood into the bathtub while I was relaxing in it, eyes closed. When I opened my eyes, the water was one big cloud of red. I screamed so loud that I might as well have been dying, and yes, he recorded everything. FML
by N O / 05/27/2014 at 2:47pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, it's my first day working the graveyard shift at a local hotel. My new boss thought it would be hilarious to sneak up behind me while dressed like the Grim Reaper. I screamed like a little girl and soaked my pants. Apparently he does this to all the new people. FML
by Anonymous / 05/04/2014 at 5:07pm / Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha) / Work
by athletiks / 03/26/2014 at 6:39pm / United States (Washington) / Health
by doesn't fuck on the first, thank god / 03/23/2014 at 4:25pm / United Kingdom (Southend-on-Sea) / Love
Today, while at a funeral for a distant family member, I was giving my condolences to the family. When one of them asked how I was doing, I replied with, "I'm still alive!", which is one of my standard responses due to being a cashier and being asked that question a hundred times a day. FML
by Merith2004 / 02/04/2014 at 12:18am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother-in-law called me every 2 hours, starting at 8pm and stopping at 10am the following morning. She says that since my wife and I are expecting our first child, I should "get used to waking up at all hours." She calls my work phone, which I'm not allowed to switch off. FML
by dope_mcfly / 01/29/2014 at 11:55am / United States (New Hampshire) / Miscellaneous
by PangolinScholar / 01/24/2014 at 7:34pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by sausages / 01/17/2014 at 3:56pm / Macedonia (Karpos) / Health
Today, I woke up from a short nap, only to find two waxing strips stuck to my eyebrows. I now have very little of my eyebrows remaining, and just as little idea which idiot in my family pulled this stupid excuse of a prank. FML
by I will find you and I will fucking fuck y / 01/05/2014 at 3:39pm / United Kingdom (Cornwall) / Miscellaneous
by ElephantLover / 12/11/2013 at 3:14pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML
by Ashamed_Sister / 11/30/2013 at 2:35am / Namibia (Windhoek) / Love
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…
- Today, my girlfriend tried to change her pad while we were sitting in a crowded movie theatre. She… Today, I hooked up with the guy I've liked for a while, even though my friends joked that his large… Today, I woke up and had a voicemail from my boyfriend. I just thought nothing of it because it was…